Guys: how often do YOU get asked out?

[MrNate 2.0]

What if a girl slapped my ass once?

 

 

What does that fall under?

[ComingInHot]

What if a girl slapped my ass once?

 

 

What does that fall under?

 

 

A Proposition or Assault depending on your mood I guess? Lol*

[CaliGuy]

A Proposition or Assault depending on your mood I guess? Lol*

 

I actually had a female VP slap me in the arse once. I was flattered

[ComingInHot]

I actually had a female VP slap me in the arse once. I was flattered

 

Oh Brother Cali :lmao:

[ThaWholigan]

What if a girl slapped my ass once?

 

 

What does that fall under?

Falls under "hints" .

 

Reading this thread is pretty interesting. I've been asked out quite a few times, usually for like drinks or coffee, some sh*t like that. It never transpires into anything though. But nowadays, making the move myself isn't so discomforting to me.

 

And I have to say, the hints are infinitely funnier than the approaches. Just this year, I've had women literally invade my personal space just to get my attention but without actually saying anything - they'll rub their ass on me on the train when it's not even full, flick their hair directly into my face just so I will look at them, stare at you like you have a f*cking huge zit sticking out of your face .

 

The hints are funnier than the approaches!

 

@Hayden - London, eh?

[CaliGuy]

Oh Brother Cali :lmao:

 

I'm not kidding! That REALLY happened. And she was pretty hot. I like a woman who is that straight forward

[Kid_Charlemange]

A few months ago, I posted the results of my OKC "experiment," where I approached the same 25 women using my own profile, and one almost identical except I used an old college buddy's pictures (with his permission). The results were astounding.

 

So I just emailed him this question. He's been in a LTR for a couple years, but before that, he was dating pretty regularly. Here is is answer:

 

"Asked out? Well that was kind of rare. Maybe twice a month. It would usually be someone at work saying like "hey there is a big group going to the rodeo next week wanna come?" or something close. Now if you mean being hit on at a bar, well that was about every time I went. They would scope to see if there was a ring and if not they'd approach and introduce themselves. Not sure if that counts! I would say that before I met [his GF] I didn't make an effort for 4-5 years, I just let women approach me."

 

We went back and forth along these lines for a while. After some prodding he, said his "best estimate" is that he had sex with 150 different women in that period of time.

[somedude81]

A few months ago, I posted the results of my OKC "experiment," where I approached the same 25 women using my own profile, and one almost identical except I used an old college buddy's pictures (with his permission). The results were astounding.

 

So I just emailed him this question. He's been in a LTR for a couple years, but before that, he was dating pretty regularly. Here is is answer:

 

"Asked out? Well that was kind of rare. Maybe twice a month. It would usually be someone at work saying like "hey there is a big group going to the rodeo next week wanna come?" or something close. Now if you mean being hit on at a bar, well that was about every time I went. They would scope to see if there was a ring and if not they'd approach and introduce themselves. Not sure if that counts! I would say that before I met [his GF] I didn't make an effort for 4-5 years, I just let women approach me."

 

We went back and forth along these lines for a while. After some prodding he, said his "best estimate" is that he had sex with 150 different women in that period of time.

 

Thanks for making me jealous.

 

Ah to be a good looking attractive man, that's the life.

 

[Phoe]

We went back and forth along these lines for a while. After some prodding he, said his "best estimate" is that he had sex with 150 different women in that period of time.

 

*shudders*

 

Yuck. That would just plain creep me out.

[Bumpin in My Trunk]

Now that I remember, I was at work when this girl came in with her family. The dad had to do some things at the counter so naturally, the whole family just waited next to him and I noticed that she was giving me looks. I would look in her direction and she would look away. I thought it was weird as hell but then I started catching on until I finally caught her looking at me and locked eye contact. I proceeded to give her a I-know-what-you're-doing-smile and let her know with my looks I find her attractive too.

 

Too bad her whole family was there. I'm not gonna lose my job over some girl.

 

Still, I hope she comes in again, and this time alone

[Kid_Charlemange]

*shudders*

 

Yuck. That would just plain creep me out.

 

I wonder how unusual it is. Most of my other buds are married and have been for some time; this guy has been pretty much half LTRs and half single.

 

Now I was his roommate for two semesters, and know he probably had 25 partners (more than my lifetime total) during that period alone. It's pretty effortless for him. One of my closest female friends, who at age 22 was "saving herself for marriage" lost her virginity to him two hours after meeting him.

 

Me? I don't think he's all that good-looking. But apparently I'm in a minority there

 

What's interesting is that his current GF is very average-looking. My ex is far more physically attractive. Go figure.

 

(His GF, however, is not a passive-aggressive narcissist suffering from delusional disorder who probably should be institutionalized)

[Toodaloo]

I COULD however, possibly say something like, "are you going to ask me out because I think I would like that"... thing is, you'd have to be talking to me in order for that to happen.

Never mind, back to square one of the topic...

 

I think that is pretty clear obvious and direct while still leaving the chap to ask the question... Like CIH says though it helps if you are already in discussion...

[Toodaloo]

THANK YOU!!! I was completely stressed with this thread

look at Priv, being the Man!!

 

Oh don't get stressed just turn your computer off!!!

 

Priv honey - you ARE the man...

 

That is all I want. A man to be a man! As I said if he hasn't got the balls to simply ask me out then I would crush him in an argument... does not bode well for the future self esteem of either. That and 100 other tiny little things that just make the whole thing wrong from the start.

 

Kid - the answer to your question goes back to confidence. A confident man will know he can win the fight so will not bother to raise his fist. Does that make sense? Your friend knew he could get those women into bed so he didn't bother trying. His wife was probably the exception to the rule and make him work for it. Thus she has the if you work for me you can have me but you have to keep working thing going. She is probably smart and as quick as a whip to keep him in line...

[Toodaloo]

Still a bit gutted that there is no update on Belinda...

 

London sucks. If you smile at someone on the tube they run a mile... Its how I get a seat when I can't be bothered to stand... People are so rude and closed off when they are squashed in to big cities...

[boilingpoint]

Priv honey - you ARE the man...

 

That is all I want. A man to be a man! As I said if he hasn't got the balls to simply ask me out then I would crush him in an argument... does not bode well for the future self esteem of either. That and 100 other tiny little things that just make the whole thing wrong from the start.

 

Sorry, you have no idea what a man is.

 

You only know that you want to completely avoid putting yourself out there for any guy you come across. You'll just settle for the most attractive man who comes to you and who sticks around long enough.

 

You're only limiting yourself here but I wish you all the best.

 

Personally I like a woman with an open mind, some character and a bit of ambition in life. Those are the keepers I'll make sure I ask out.

[Ninjainpajamas]

Blimey, where do blokes live and women not approach them?? Maybe London is different?

 

I won't go down the list of stereotypes I've heard about women from England, from guys who actually lived/from there or just guys who met them in other countries or what not, but that's definitely one of the reputations they have.

[Harradin]

I can never see when a girl is hinting at me, so unless I ask them out because I like them, I tend to be approached as apparently she "makes it obvious" but I'm still not connecting the dots.

 

Mostly in clubs if I start talking to a girl (don't really count as asking out as I'm making conversation or gonna start hitting on them,) most of the time she's the one who makes a move on me or asks me out.

[Keenly]

Oh don't get stressed just turn your computer off!!!

 

Priv honey - you ARE the man...

 

That is all I want. A man to be a man! As I said if he hasn't got the balls to simply ask me out then I would crush him in an argument... does not bode well for the future self esteem of either. That and 100 other tiny little things that just make the whole thing wrong from the start.

 

Kid - the answer to your question goes back to confidence. A confident man will know he can win the fight so will not bother to raise his fist. Does that make sense? Your friend knew he could get those women into bed so he didn't bother trying. His wife was probably the exception to the rule and make him work for it. Thus she has the if you work for me you can have me but you have to keep working thing going. She is probably smart and as quick as a whip to keep him in line...

 

 

There is zero correlation between a man asking you out and a man standing up to your crap.

 

 

 

I don't know where you pulled this from, but the two have nothing to do with each other. Do you know why I don't ask women out? Because they need to prove themselves worthy of my advance.

[ComingInHot]

There is zero correlation between a man asking you out and a man standing up to your crap.

 

 

 

I don't know where you pulled this from, but the two have nothing to do with each other. Do you know why I don't ask women out? Because they need to prove themselves worthy of my advance.

 

say what Keenly? I sincerely do not understand honey. How in the world is a girl going to 'prove herself as worthy of Your asking her out IF you don't ask her out to spend time to get to know her?

...Maybe I'm too old for this sh$t...

[Keenly]

say what Keenly? I sincerely do not understand honey. How in the world is a girl going to 'prove herself as worthy of Your asking her out IF you don't ask her out to spend time to get to know her?

...Maybe I'm too old for this sh$t...

 

I'm extremely selective with who I choose to pursue, because when I date, I give it my all. I won't even try if its some one I'm not 100% into.

 

So I observe. I have several conversations with her instead of one 3 minute one. I see how she acts, what she is interested in, what she is passionate about, and most importantly what her body language is telling me.

 

Then I make the decision whether or not I feel like pursuing her.

 

 

Don't act surprised, I'm merely doing exactly what women do.

[braindamage]

Once in my life - although the LTR lasts till today (and going).

[ComingInHot]

I'm extremely selective with who I choose to pursue, because when I date, I give it my all. I won't even try if its some one I'm not 100% into.

 

So I observe. I have several conversations with her instead of one 3 minute one. I see how she acts, what she is interested in, what she is passionate about, and most importantly what her body language is telling me.

 

Then I make the decision whether or not I feel like pursuing her.

 

 

Don't act surprised, I'm merely doing exactly what women do.

 

better explanation * she's not 'proving ' herself, just showing who she is and what she is like. That's how it should be

good for you being patient and selective and discerning. *

[Toodaloo]

Sorry, you have no idea what a man is.

 

You only know that you want to completely avoid putting yourself out there for any guy you come across. You'll just settle for the most attractive man who comes to you and who sticks around long enough.

 

You're only limiting yourself here but I wish you all the best.

 

Personally I like a woman with an open mind, some character and a bit of ambition in life. Those are the keepers I'll make sure I ask out.

 

I am fully aware of what a "man" is. I am fully aware of what I want from a man, am I going to get that? Who knows quite frankly I would rather be on my own until the day I die than settle for someone that I did not consider to be the best.

 

I may well be limiting myself however I don't see why I should settle for second best nor why anyone else should settle with me when I consider them second best. Not fair on either party and not conductive to a healthy relationship at all.

 

I am not going to "settle" for the first attractive man that comes along. If that were the case then I would have taken up any of the many offers from the very attractive men in my past that I have turned down. Why? Because I knew something was wrong or slightly off and I believe that marriage is for life not just for Christmas.

 

I am glad that you know what you want and I hope that your not digging and insinuating that I am in some way bland, unambitious or narrow minded simply because while I am happy to lead the way when it comes to a man deciding if he wants to date me I would prefer that he ask the question.

 

You seem to have it in your head that if a girl would rather you ask them out instead that it shows some form of weakness but you waiting around to be asked in case you get rejected is OK??? Contradiction in itself there!

 

I started another thread on this else where as it seems rather unfair that this one has been hi jacked and gone off topic.

[SawtoothMars]

There are a few reasons why women don't put themselves out there.....they fear that they will be labelled or give the impression they are easy.

 

How about this....what is your impression of a woman that does ask you out, picks you up and pays for the date? Do you feel emasculinated? or do you feel flattered?

 

I've never in my entire life met ANYONE who thinks a girl is easy just because she asks a guy out. I once got asked out by a girl who was a public spokeswoman for staying a virgin until marriage. Never in my wildest dreams (and they can be wild), did I think she would be easy. I dated her for months and eventually got dumped before I even got to first base. We are still friends!

 

When a woman asks me out... 9 times in 10 it is a very hefty girl. I like it because I know she likes me on some level... and if I share that feeling then I feel we have a great shot.

 

Now... if she picks me up and pays... and I have had that happen once... it is a very odd feeling. I dated a Filipino woman who decided to change restaurants after we had met. She drove me to an new restaurant and we literally fought over the check. It was kind of embarrassing and I thought it meant she didn't like me. However, she did book a second date with me later.

[Kofybean]

We are also constantly told DO NOT ASK THE GUY OUT... Every self help book, every article, every shred of advice is do not ask him - let him ask you. So we are stuck flirting, hoping that you catch our (un)subtle hints and ask us...

 

haha looks and books and articles instead of simply asking men.

 

I have asked guys out and it has never gone well.

 

This is pretty much what every guy goes through already yet they still do it. You think you're special if you think you should get 100% Yes ratio.