777doom Posted October 4, 2014 Posted October 4, 2014 Hi everyone, just looking for a bit of advice and I'll try to keep it short. Met a girl 'online' a couple of months ago (tinder actually) and we got on pretty well and I arranged a date within a couple of days. Met up for drinks and got on well, decided to meet again at some point. Despite pretty busy schedules we did meet up again 5 or 6 days later. This time I invited her over to my house (parents house actually, I'm 21 living at home for the moment). During this time I find out that she had only been recently single, for a couple of months or so and that she is still friends with her ex. We were alone so watched some tv and I escalated things, probably a bit too fast in hindsight. We made out etc, but didn't have sex and we kissed again when she left. Afterwards we did agree to go out again, I was planning on doing a fun activity, something a bit more date-worthy, but overtime we were texting a bit less and longer gaps between responses. We also both have/had a pretty busy schedule that clashed alot so couldn't arrange anything for a couple of weeks after anyway. I backed off a lot to see if it would spark any interest but no so I asked for a straight answer and she said she wasn't really sure what she was looking for considering she was so newly single. Basically she said she didn't want to take things as fast as I did. So she said sorry it didnt work out etc and we haven't spoken since (this was about 3 - 4 weeks ago). This makes sense to me and I think I ****ed it up a bit by going too fast. Having said that she seemed to like me and we got on well. Is there any way I can re-initiate contact without putting any pressure on her or coming over as needy. I feel like if it had happened at a different time then something may have come out of it. I would assume the biggest factor here is time to get over her ex, even though they are still' friends' (I don't personally believe you can be after a break-up). Thanks for any response!
cif Posted October 4, 2014 Posted October 4, 2014 It sounds to me like she did the fade. BUT since you didn't really "break up" why not send her a msg asking how she's doing and if she'd like to meet for drinks? 1
Author 777doom Posted October 4, 2014 Author Posted October 4, 2014 It sounds to me like she did the fade. BUT since you didn't really "break up" why not send her a msg asking how she's doing and if she'd like to meet for drinks? Hey cif. I was considering doing this but I thought that if she doesn't want to go out then that's my only chance gone. Would it be better to build a bit more of a rapport over a week or so (without any mention of meeting up) before asking to go out, just to gauge her interest first...Or will she realise that's exactly what I am doing, which could potentially be a turn off?
cif Posted October 4, 2014 Posted October 4, 2014 You guys have already been on a date. If she's interested she'll accept. If not reject and you'll have your answer. Why dance around it and waste time? Unless you're looking for a pen pal just get straight to it.
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