Brooke02 Posted October 3, 2014 Posted October 3, 2014 It's been 31 days since my BU. 2 1/2 weeks NC. Yesterday I had a some what good day. Today, I'm looking for signals of sadness. I keep thinking of memories and my ex to see if I'm sad, but it's like I'm drawing a blank. I'm not happy but not sad..I'm in between. It's like a sick and twisted feeling like I'm looking for sadness almost seeing if I will cry, why? Also, my memories of seeing him, feeling him, etc. Seem so far away now, it's only been 33 days. But I know tomorrow may be different since it's a roller coaster of ups and downs. I'm just surprised I guess. Anyone else ever feel this way?
Frank2thepoint Posted October 4, 2014 Posted October 4, 2014 You are healing and moving on. You no longer are feeling the great sadness of loss, but not yet the comfort of emotional stability. You aren't thinking about the past relationship as much as you were, and even if you do, you aren't phased by it. With time, it will fade to the background of your memories. I recently went through an amicable break up, it's still fresh for me, and I am currently overwhelmed with emotions. Just sadness of the loss, confusion, and strong feelings for my ex. There is a small part of me that knows it is for the best overall, and with time I will heal. But the thought of not holding her, looking her in the eyes, or canoodling, hurts very much.
Author Brooke02 Posted October 4, 2014 Author Posted October 4, 2014 It just came out if the blue too. My relationship was only 9 months. I knew it wasn't gonna last because of all the red flags and my gut feeling. But I held on because a relationship that didn't make me completely happy would be better than being alone. I will admit that, I can see that now. I did love him so much, I have so many great memories & it was a loss to me but he just wasn't my match. Like you said, I feel better but not 100% yet. I know how your feeling, the pain is the worst thing ever. Thank you for your post, stay strong.. We'll find the person that's meant for us:) These relationships were just our stepping stones. :-)
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