tripped Posted October 3, 2014 Posted October 3, 2014 So this is somewhat of a followup to a thread I had last week, but I feel like I need new advice as the situation has progressed. Basically, I've been seeing a girl for a few months long distance. For the first couple of months, everything was beyond amazing, and we were both very open about our feelings. We would visit constantly, had great intimacy, etc. She decided to move to my city (has been planning to for awhile, total coincidence that we had just met) and everything changed pretty suddenly when she found her apartment here. The past several weeks have been very distant on her part, ignoring almost any emotion I try to show her and cutting our communication down by 80-90%. Any time I have tried to bring this up, she has either brushed it off like everything is fine, or gotten very defensive. I have been giving her a lot of space this week, and she is moving tomorrow. Her parents will be in town helping her move all weekend, so I don't know if I will see her until they leave, it's up to her. My question is, what should I say/do if the distance continues in person? A lot of her stress has already let up this week (she's done with work, she's had her going away party, she's finished packing) and yet she is still being just as distant. I am aware that I shouldn't expect her to shift back to normal immediately, but at what point does it go from "she's just stressed about moving" to "there's something else going on" She recently revealed that her past few relationships have been very bad, and she alluded to her "building up a wall." It was in reference to a friend though, and before the move I saw the opposite of a wall.
Jules Dash Posted October 3, 2014 Posted October 3, 2014 When someone needs space always give it to them. Always. Never try to fight someone who is trying to get space.
Author tripped Posted October 3, 2014 Author Posted October 3, 2014 When someone needs space always give it to them. Always. Never try to fight someone who is trying to get space. And I haven't, the second she said she needed space I gave it to her and said I was here for her when she needs me. But at a certain point, when she is back in town, there has to be a point where she either talks to me or lets me move on, right?
Diezel Posted October 3, 2014 Posted October 3, 2014 What can you do? Date other women. She doesn't "have to let you move on". You do that on your own. Obviously she isn't talking to you, so stop trying. She's probably excited about the prospect of a new place and meeting new people. She's obviously not including you in that picture, so don't include her in yours anymore. 1
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