Justaguy30 Posted October 3, 2014 Posted October 3, 2014 I would like to start this thread to help people figure out what is going on. There are a few signs that are just sure things. I will start with if a woman has a new friend but she says he is gay. That is a very likely sign she just doesn't want you to be suspicious of her cheating with him because she is.
Diezel Posted October 3, 2014 Posted October 3, 2014 If you find them in bed with someone else... they are cheating. 7
me85 Posted October 3, 2014 Posted October 3, 2014 (edited) If they're not having sex with you... They don't want you touching their phone... You catch them beating off in the bathroom with the door locked...and they have their phone with them... (All of the above happened to me and more) Edited October 3, 2014 by me85
PegNosePete Posted October 3, 2014 Posted October 3, 2014 I will start with if a woman has a new friend but she says he is gay. That is a very likely sign she just doesn't want you to be suspicious of her cheating with him because she is. Either that, or she has a new friend who is gay. Sorry but your "sure sign" can generate a lot of false positives.
d0nnivain Posted October 3, 2014 Posted October 3, 2014 New / better grooming habits Secretive phone calls. 1
Redhead14 Posted October 3, 2014 Posted October 3, 2014 Does she usually lie? Has she given you reason to distrust you in the past? If not, then you believe her. If she hasn't lied or given reason to distrust in the past, then you are suspicious for reasons which are your own.
Haydn Posted October 3, 2014 Posted October 3, 2014 I've never been cheated on (I think). But I have cheated on. My give away is a new opinion on something, that I'd never held before. (oh the shame Haydn)
Leilah Posted October 3, 2014 Posted October 3, 2014 I noticed that people who cheat generally start accusing their partners of cheating as well whether it was warranted or not. I guess they are essentially trying to project their guilt on to you. 6
Thicke2013 Posted October 3, 2014 Posted October 3, 2014 For me it was simple. She was being distant and suddenly started talking to her "friends" more on the phone. Then all of a sudden she had a "friend" that was going through a hard time and needed her to come over. I followed. End of story. 1
beyondcrushed Posted October 3, 2014 Posted October 3, 2014 (edited) In my experiences: -exh: caught him texting another woman then in the arms with another woman -exbf: found texts between him and other woman Before I found the hard evidence, my gut was telling me long before that something wasn't right. These were the gut wrenching signs: -keeping his cell phone hidden -talking about another female "friend" a lot -hanging out with said female a lot (without you) -texting regularly with female (and not willing to share those texts with me, even deleting them) -increased interaction with said female (and not including her husband) -making plans with female (without inviting me) -a few too many late nights with friends and said female -history of cheating and flirting with married and single women -history of lying Always trust your gut. You know when something doesn't feel right. But.....when you're emotionally invested most people never listen to their guts. You argue with yourself, concluding you must be wrong. In those cases, you either let it go, trust them fully and continue to live in bliss. Or....you look for hard evidence (i.e. find sexts, in bed with another, etc), then you will know without a doubt. Question is, if you find evidence, then what? What will you do? Edited October 3, 2014 by beyondcrushed 2
Author Justaguy30 Posted October 3, 2014 Author Posted October 3, 2014 Either that, or she has a new friend who is gay. Sorry but your "sure sign" can generate a lot of false positives. That is possible but that lie is used a lot!
Elle1975 Posted October 4, 2014 Posted October 4, 2014 I'd be suspicious over constant irritability, total absence of a sex life, that kind of things. As for a gay male friend, I had a friend like that at work. He really was gay, married to his husband, and they had 6 kids together. We'd check out the cute customers together I really think that what gives a clue is the behavior at home, new habits like going to the gym alone out of the blue, that kind of things.. 1
Arieswoman Posted October 4, 2014 Posted October 4, 2014 1. Being pre-occupied/suking/bad tempered/uninterested in anything you do or say/being critical. 2. Need to "work late" more, getting involved in hobbies more (outside the home, that is). 3. Buying new clothes. and the all-time classic - " I need more space ".... 2
scatterd Posted October 4, 2014 Posted October 4, 2014 defensive,sneaking to talk on phone,distant and uncompasionate. less sex.Dressing and looking better. 1
Author Justaguy30 Posted October 6, 2014 Author Posted October 6, 2014 Less affectionate, if she stops kissing you its pretty much over imo. I also noticed with my last ex when we had sex she wouldn't want to get fully undressed. That is when she started cheating on me.
Justanaverageguy Posted October 6, 2014 Posted October 6, 2014 I noticed that people who cheat generally start accusing their partners of cheating as well whether it was warranted or not. I guess they are essentially trying to project their guilt on to you. I don't think this is caused by a projection of guilt. People in general believe others will act and behave in a similar manner to themselves. Those who are not cheaters are generally trusting of their partner - because they don't suspect their partners would do something like that. Those who cheat are often possessive, jealous and overly suspicious of things their partner does. They expect all people think the same way they do. I would steer clear of anyone who gets excessively jealous without good reason. It's a reflection of the way they believe people act ... which normally means it's how they act.
Omei Posted October 6, 2014 Posted October 6, 2014 Phones have been mentioned but PC's too when history's are daily erased, they try to cover the screen with their body, they minimize things as soon as you walk into the room, they put a password to log into windows, they turn it off completely every time to sway you from not using it etc. 1
Author Justaguy30 Posted October 6, 2014 Author Posted October 6, 2014 If your partner deletes all of their texts and call logs daily and browser history on their phone. Leave them.
Author Justaguy30 Posted October 6, 2014 Author Posted October 6, 2014 The reason I started this thread is because when I was with my partner she would just lie and I knew she was doing it but just couldn't catch her doing it and it really drove me crazy. Knowing what I know now I should have just left and I would like to help anyone figure it out before it ruins their lives as mine was ruined.
Dork Vader Posted October 6, 2014 Posted October 6, 2014 The signs of cheating are fairly clear cut. People don't jump into cheating unless it is a drunken one night stand. That said it starts casually. They will become addicted to their phone. They will become secretive with it. They will hide it. They will have a work lunch, dinner or some other thing. It's important to note this is only a sign when combined with other signs of cheating. People can and will have work lunches and dinners. They will become busy. Once the sex starts or they start to feel guilt. They will become critical of you. You wont be able to do anything right. They will nag at you and in general pick you apart in an attempt to justify their actions. Things wont add up, they say they got off work at 5:00 yet you'll notice they have left early. They will become with drawn intimately. They will be very inconsistent with their emotions. One moment you're a rock star, the next you're not. You will start to feel second. If you're getting all of the signs above I can almost guarantee you, you're being cheated on. 1
Author Justaguy30 Posted October 6, 2014 Author Posted October 6, 2014 If you notice on days you work late or they work late all of a sudden they don't want to have sex with you and this becomes a pattern.
Dork Vader Posted October 6, 2014 Posted October 6, 2014 If you notice on days you work late or they work late all of a sudden they don't want to have sex with you and this becomes a pattern. Yes and no, working late and not wanting sex could just be because they are tired. It's important to note that they have to show multiple signs of cheating. If it's only one or two of the signs of cheating, it's likely something else. Your gut will tell you. I believe your gut tells you because you don't see these signs all at once. You see a red flag then right it off as suspicious or a red flag. The red flags build but you slowly become semi immune to the red flags. Thus your gut is telling you they are cheating. All the dots are there you just have not connected them yet. Few people can cheat and get away with it. 3
Ameden Posted October 10, 2014 Posted October 10, 2014 From a technology standpoint since we use it so much hiding screen or turning away from you when texting never letting go of their phone or not letting you have it when asked to see it clearing browser history often going to sites like himchat.com, strangermeetup.com and so on
Recommended Posts