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is the "I just cant be in a relationship right now" line


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Posted

and its variants ("I need some time to work on myself" etc) EVER legit??? or is it usually just a polite way of saying "I CAN be in a relationship right now.... but not with you"???

 

after "let's just be friends" (which usually means "have a nice life") this is the most common dumping line I have seen.

 

at first I believed it but then I found out through mutual friends that the dumper hooked up with another guy one day after dumping me so the whole "I just dont want to be in a relationship with anyone" line was obviously a lie!

 

in your experience is this line usually just a polite way of saying "I am looking for a relationship... but not with you" or is it EVER actually legit???

Posted

It can be legit.

High stress levels, just having left a bad relationship, I have turned down guys because I truly felt torn apart inside.

There was no way I could have been in a relationship at that time.

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Posted
and its variants ("I need some time to work on myself" etc) EVER legit??? or is it usually just a polite way of saying "I CAN be in a relationship right now.... but not with you"???

 

after "let's just be friends" (which usually means "have a nice life") this is the most common dumping line I have seen.

 

at first I believed it but then I found out through mutual friends that the dumper hooked up with another guy one day after dumping me so the whole "I just dont want to be in a relationship with anyone" line was obviously a lie!

 

in your experience is this line usually just a polite way of saying "I am looking for a relationship... but not with you" or is it EVER actually legit???

 

I guess it can be legit in some cases. In my case it wasn't. He needed "time alone" because his life "was a mess", but three weeks after the BU he had a new girlfriend. Well, maybe three weeks alone was all he needed to get his life back together :p

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Posted
It can be legit.

High stress levels, just having left a bad relationship, I have turned down guys because I truly felt torn apart inside.

There was no way I could have been in a relationship at that time.

Same after separating from my husband. I wasn't ready for anything for years and that had nothing to do with the men I met.

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Posted

I wasn't ready after my ex for a few months..... Even though I met some nice men I would have loved to have dated.

Posted

The prepositional phrase "with you" is silent but implied.

 

If you were perfect for the speaker of that phrase, they would make time or get over their problem.

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