Darren2013 Posted September 29, 2014 Posted September 29, 2014 Maybe not all women but it turns out some women will appear pissed to mask the fact that they are disappointed that a certain guy they like has not asked them out. I've been reading some stuff about that on other sites. I personally do not understand why any woman would be pissed about that because to me that communicates a strong sense of entitlement. Just as I as a man am not entitled to receive any attention from women it is equally true that women are not entitled to be asked out just because they like the guy alot. Some might say that well the guy likes her too and she knows it but he just isn't stepping up and being man enough to ask her out. I say so what. She still isn't entitled to get asked out even if there is a mutual interest there. The guy has every right to stay in his comfortable cubby hole or shell and not stick his neck out and ask her out on a date. For whatever reasons he is deciding not to act on his attraction for her and he has every right to do nothing about his attractions. If a woman is pissed because I won't ask her out then I can almost guarantee that I would be less inclined to ask her out if I was already thinking about it beforehand. It would not sit well with me because then I have to wonder how far her sense of entitlement goes in other areas if the dates progress to something serious. If we are having problems before even getting started then there's no reason to start. There is no law written anywhere that says a man must ask a woman out even if he likes her and even if she made it clear she likes him. His reasons for not doing so are his business and they don't have to make sense to anyone except himself.
LoneIsland Posted September 29, 2014 Posted September 29, 2014 Yes women get pissed when rejected. Not much use asking now that they are no longer available to you.
boilingpoint Posted September 29, 2014 Posted September 29, 2014 But they haven't been rejected - that's the thing. Most women don't realise that they always have the option to just go straight up to the guy and say: ''wanna get a coffee sometime?"
LoneIsland Posted September 29, 2014 Posted September 29, 2014 When they get that angry, they have been rejected bad even if you haven't done the rejection. You have to be on your toes or the game is over before you knew it started. The only option they understand is you pick up the signal or you pick the exit.
Tayken Posted September 29, 2014 Posted September 29, 2014 But they haven't been rejected - that's the thing. Most women don't realise that they always have the option to just go straight up to the guy and say: ''wanna get a coffee sometime?" Ah.....but they are bigger than that in their mind, and because we still live in the dark ages, "it's a man' job to ask them out" If it's a man' job to do all this nonsense, why then do most these days insist on telling a guy the exact ring they want? Ludicrous just like people dictating which gift they want for xmas / valentines / etc Whatever happened to it's the thought that counts?
LoneIsland Posted September 29, 2014 Posted September 29, 2014 Whatever happened to it's the thought that counts? It is still in vogue. Her thought counts very much.
ComingInHot Posted September 29, 2014 Posted September 29, 2014 Quick question, could it be possible that it is not 'anger' per say that the woman is feeling but disappointment? I am trying to remember from a long long looooong time ago how I felt when the guy I was crushing on didn't ask me out... I wasn't 'pissed' at him. I was disappointed then spent a couple days wondering what was wrong with me. Then I was fine and over it. He ended up asking me out later but I couldn't do because I don't like to feel insecure. (could just be a twisted girl thing but it's true). Anyone?
LoneIsland Posted September 29, 2014 Posted September 29, 2014 Quick question, could it be possible that it is not 'anger' per say that the woman is feeling but disappointment? I am trying to remember from a long long looooong time ago how I felt when the guy I was crushing on didn't ask me out... I wasn't 'pissed' at him. I was disappointed then spent a couple days wondering what was wrong with me. Then I was fine and over it. He ended up asking me out later but I couldn't do because I don't like to feel insecure. (could just be a twisted girl thing but it's true). Anyone? The response varies. Some get extremely angry, some get scared, some remain friendly and hopeful, some get truly embarrassed, craw under a rock and never be seen again. It's not the guy's fault. Girls like to send sudden signals they expect guys to recognize instantly. Often, they don't.
ComingInHot Posted September 29, 2014 Posted September 29, 2014 The response varies. Some get extremely angry, some get scared, some remain friendly and hopeful, some get truly embarrassed, craw under a rock and never be seen again. It's not the guy's fault. Girls like to send sudden signals they expect guys to recognize instantly. Often, they don't. Should be the quote of the day my friend!! Maybe because I was usually friends with most of 'the boys', it was easier to just carry on being friends regardless. I figured out younger than most that if I wanted a male to 'UNDERSTAND ME' all I needed to do was to TELL HIM. Then Ta Da, the guy got it* and the stress was gone and no games need be played except to flirt and have fun. Well, I feel bad you have 'pissed off' so many women because you aren't asking them all out . It just isn't easy being you OP, is it (I am totally joking if you don't know )? CIH* 1
LoneIsland Posted September 29, 2014 Posted September 29, 2014 I figured out younger than most that if I wanted a male to 'UNDERSTAND ME' all I needed to do was to TELL HIM. Glad you figured it out. Words are best for guys, although even then that may not be reliable some times. Same words used by guys and girls can have different meanings. In another thread, I said "two way street". The woman said "do you mean the traffic ?" I said "no, the interaction between 2 people".
maysj18 Posted September 29, 2014 Posted September 29, 2014 Just my two cents: men act just as "pissed" when they're rejected. It's a normal human reaction to being turned down. It isn't an entitlement mentality and if you think it is then you men must have an entitlement mentality as well. And as far as women living in the dark ages, a lot of men feel overwhelmed or weirded out when women ask them out. There's a stigma that BOTH men and women are keeping alive and it's hard to change that.
Phoe Posted September 29, 2014 Posted September 29, 2014 The response varies. Some get extremely angry, some get scared, some remain friendly and hopeful, some get truly embarrassed, craw under a rock and never be seen again. It's not the guy's fault. Girls like to send sudden signals they expect guys to recognize instantly. Often, they don't. Exactly, there are a variety of reactions. Mine is embarrassment. Last year I had a crush on a guy. I sent signals for a while in hopes I might see something back. Finally sucked it up and asked him to join me for dinner and a drink, he declined. For the next few weeks I was very embarassed to interact with him. Not angry, but a bit avoidant just because I felt very stupid
Fondue Posted September 29, 2014 Posted September 29, 2014 I had a lady that got upset with me for not asking her out. I was kind of dumbfounded. She wasn't mad per say, she was irritated. She was like, "UGH, WHEN ARE YOU GONNA ASK ME OUT ALREADY!?" Mind you, this was one of our first (probably was the first, now that I think about it) phone conversations after I got her #. This is someone I met in person and decided to grow a pair and just ask for the digits. She was also super model quality (I wrote about this woman in prior posts). Long story short, she was super crazy. No matter how hot, crazy can't be dealt with. Ran away from that.
Mrin Posted September 29, 2014 Posted September 29, 2014 It is just human emotion - it manifests itself in many different forms. That and women can play just as many PUA-type mind games as men. If being nice to you didn't solicit a "strike" perhaps ignoring or being mean to you might. Ah, the wonderfully complicated and chaotic dance of romance...
Fondue Posted September 29, 2014 Posted September 29, 2014 Oh man, this also reminds me of my younger days. Not sure if these are situations where they were "mad," but definitely confusing! Women (girls) just EXPECTED you to know they "liked" you. I had several women, months/years later tell me, "I was really into you, why didn't you ask me out!?" How the **** should I know you were into me? No signals. Nothing. Hell, one never even talked to me. I met her like two years after high school and she told me, "I had such a crush on you, why didn't you ever talk to me?" I didn't even know this girl existed-- let alone her name. I wasn't even popular or good-looking either. I don't know why these girls liked me in the first place. Wish I knew all this before though. Would have made for a much more interesting life.
Author Darren2013 Posted September 29, 2014 Author Posted September 29, 2014 The response varies. Some get extremely angry, some get scared, some remain friendly and hopeful, some get truly embarrassed, craw under a rock and never be seen again. It's not the guy's fault. Girls like to send sudden signals they expect guys to recognize instantly. Often, they don't. Yeah it is unrealistic to expect me to jump on signals that can be easily explained away for other things. Even a touch on the arm is not a strong enough signal. She would have to give me a signal that I can't explain away before I make a move.
Tayken Posted September 29, 2014 Posted September 29, 2014 It is still in vogue. Her thought counts very much. By this you are referring to the magazine right?
Gloria25 Posted September 29, 2014 Posted September 29, 2014 Sense of entitlement? Really? Did you ever consider that the woman might be upset at other things (i.e. how much dating sucks)? Did you also ever consider that the way the guy is in his approach might be confusing her and she doesn't know what to do? So, she's frustrated? Did you also consider she may be going through her monthly "womanly" thing and things that normally wouldn't bother her, actually bother her? Without talking to someone and guessing/making assumptions as to why they do what they do doesn't help anyone...
Author Darren2013 Posted September 29, 2014 Author Posted September 29, 2014 Sense of entitlement? Really? Did you ever consider that the woman might be upset at other things (i.e. how much dating sucks)? Did you also ever consider that the way the guy is in his approach might be confusing her and she doesn't know what to do? So, she's frustrated? Did you also consider she may be going through her monthly "womanly" thing and things that normally wouldn't bother her, actually bother her? Without talking to someone and guessing/making assumptions as to why they do what they do doesn't help anyone... Thank you.
dragonfire13 Posted September 29, 2014 Posted September 29, 2014 If I met a guy once, sensed an interest that was mutual but nothing came of it or I never heard from him again, I wouldn't take it personally or even feel that rejected. I mean, how well can someone know you from one meeting for you to feel rejected? If he decided not to pursue things, that's his prerogative. Also, I wouldn't get attached or hopeful with a guy I just met. However, I do get annoyed when a guy indicates interest, continues to stay in contact (random contact such as text messages or through social media comments, often flirty) and even vaguely mentions hanging out sometimes, but it never happens. Similarly, I would get p*ssed off if friends would constantly contact me but never make the effort to hang out. I'm just of that mind set where I prefer face-to-face interaction over constantly being glued to my phone or chatting to people and getting updates about their life via social media. It's lazy, soulless communication in my opinion, and unfortunately something both men and women rely on. I bet you, if none of these methods of communication existed, people would be getting a lot more dates! As opposed to being put on the back burner until people can be arsed or if nothing better comes along. 1
LoneIsland Posted September 29, 2014 Posted September 29, 2014 By this you are referring to the magazine right? No I mean the woman's thought counts (implying the man's thought doesn't count) is still in fashion. Vogue is a word as well as the name of a mag.
Tayken Posted September 29, 2014 Posted September 29, 2014 No I mean the woman's thought counts (implying the man's thought doesn't count) is still in fashion. Vogue is a word as well as the name of a mag. Ah... http://cdn.memegenerator.net/instances/400x/30931388.jpg note to self
LoneIsland Posted September 29, 2014 Posted September 29, 2014 Yeah it is unrealistic to expect me to jump on signals that can be easily explained away for other things. Even a touch on the arm is not a strong enough signal. She would have to give me a signal that I can't explain away before I make a move. Well a woman once grabbed my arm with both her hands. I still didn't see that as a signal. She was normally very friendly. So I thought she was just being friendly. Afterwards, she was annoyed. Then there was another woman, she was cold to me all year like -2C. Then one day she suddenly became +40C. I thought she must have suffered some unexpected problems or something and I didn't see that as a signal. Afterwards, she remained friendly. If either of them had said to me: "hey sexy guy, wanna come out with me ?" I would have said yes. Goes to show signals don't work all that good when there is room for misinterpretation.
ThaWholigan Posted September 29, 2014 Posted September 29, 2014 Some of them do get noticeably disappointed. Angry? I've only really seen that once, and it was more like mild frustration. I never really clocked they wanted me till afterwards...
Keenly Posted September 29, 2014 Posted September 29, 2014 Just my two cents: men act just as "pissed" when they're rejected. It's a normal human reaction to being turned down. It isn't an entitlement mentality and if you think it is then you men must have an entitlement mentality as well. And as far as women living in the dark ages, a lot of men feel overwhelmed or weirded out when women ask them out. There's a stigma that BOTH men and women are keeping alive and it's hard to change that. I see this all the time on LS, but I've never seen nor heard of it from any man I've ever met in my entire life. I don't know where these men are, but just because one guy is turned off from it, doesn't Kean another guy would not jump on the chance.
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