abby_tx Posted September 27, 2014 Posted September 27, 2014 I went on a date with a guy I met online. I thought he was goodlooking and nice, but the attraction/chemistry wasn't there for me. Despite that, we had a fun date and great conversation. We both were really open which was a nice change from the last guy I dated (fun guy, but we never got into anything deep). Anyway, the downside of being a little too open is I found out he has a bit of a shady past. He was a drug dealer in high school and got into a lot of fights. I wouldn't have guessed it since he seemed a bit dorky in person. I also found out he didn't go to college and his career aspirations seem a little low. Okay, the last thing that bothers me.... he texted me Friday afternoon to see if I had plans for the weekend. I was busy and forgot to reply. I get a second text from him later that night saying, "I guess you found something better to do. I'm bored. :(" That rubbed me the wrong way. I just get an overall bad vibe from him despite our fun date. I had thought I'd give it a second date, but is it worth it?? Not sure what to do.
Assasda Posted September 27, 2014 Posted September 27, 2014 That last needy text from him put you over the top. hahahaha Nothing more. You didnt care about his shady past, his job situation or anything. - Just that last text. -And you are in your right I get the vibe that youre still attracted to this guy, so, go out with him. You know you want to
Author abby_tx Posted September 27, 2014 Author Posted September 27, 2014 That last needy text from him put you over the top. hahahaha Nothing more. You didnt care about his shady past, his job situation or anything. - Just that last text. -And you are in your right I get the vibe that youre still attracted to this guy, so, go out with him. You know you want to The other stuff bothered me, but yes. The needy text put me over the edge. If he's only hung out with me once for three hours and already is upset at me for not replying soon enough? Underneath that nice guy package, he could be an angry or possessive guy. I don't know how you get the vibe that I'm still attracted?
Dork Vader Posted September 27, 2014 Posted September 27, 2014 Move on the guy doesn't stand a chance.
CaliGuy Posted September 27, 2014 Posted September 27, 2014 Anyway, the downside of being a little too open is I found out he has a bit of a shady past. He was a drug dealer in high school and got into a lot of fights. I wouldn't have guessed it since he seemed a bit dorky in person. I also found out he didn't go to college and his career aspirations seem a little low. This statement above should be enough to have provided you an answer. A clear and emphatic NO! Run away -- fast.
Author abby_tx Posted September 27, 2014 Author Posted September 27, 2014 Okay. This settles it. No second date. It sucks because I really wish I had someone special. Or really ANYONE to hang out with. But I'm not desperate enough to settle. 1
Assasda Posted September 27, 2014 Posted September 27, 2014 The other stuff bothered me, but yes. The needy text put me over the edge. If he's only hung out with me once for three hours and already is upset at me for not replying soon enough? Underneath that nice guy package, he could be an angry or possessive guy. I don't know how you get the vibe that I'm still attracted? I get the vibe that youre still attracted, because you posted here. You cared enough to ask. See you've made your mind up though, women change their minds though, dont be afraid to follow your intuitions
spiderowl Posted September 27, 2014 Posted September 27, 2014 I went on a date with a guy I met online. I thought he was goodlooking and nice, but the attraction/chemistry wasn't there for me. Despite that, we had a fun date and great conversation. We both were really open which was a nice change from the last guy I dated (fun guy, but we never got into anything deep). Anyway, the downside of being a little too open is I found out he has a bit of a shady past. He was a drug dealer in high school and got into a lot of fights. I wouldn't have guessed it since he seemed a bit dorky in person. I also found out he didn't go to college and his career aspirations seem a little low. Okay, the last thing that bothers me.... he texted me Friday afternoon to see if I had plans for the weekend. I was busy and forgot to reply. I get a second text from him later that night saying, "I guess you found something better to do. I'm bored. :(" That rubbed me the wrong way. I just get an overall bad vibe from him despite our fun date. I had thought I'd give it a second date, but is it worth it?? Not sure what to do. It sounds like you good a good vibe from him and had a good date, but what he told you has triggered concerns. His last text was a bit peevish and, if you weren't much too late in replying, a bit much. If I was having doubts about someone and then got that text, I'd be where you are now. What do you feel in your gut about him - happy, excited, anxious, uncomfortable? If mixed, what is the predominant feeling? If it's really not clear, you need to buy time to work this out. Unless you enjoy excitement and are used to dramatic situations, you'll probably go with your predominant gut feeling ultimately.
SycamoreCircle Posted September 27, 2014 Posted September 27, 2014 This statement above should be enough to have provided you an answer. A clear and emphatic NO! Run away -- fast. Well, not necessarily. I knew an older woman who was very independent, responsible, disciplined and extremely intelligent who described her teenage self as a "drug dealer".
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