knowman Posted March 7, 2005 Posted March 7, 2005 I am a person who is attracted to women outside of my race. I have gotten grief from my high school teacher to former supervisor and some peers about my choice. My last 2 relationships failed because I listened to too many people. It happened with my last relationship when my ex-girlfriend refused to introduce me to her parents when she was introduced to my family. It hurt me deeply after we broke up and angry that her parents pressured her to end the relationship with me. I don't like people dictating my choices for me and allowed it to happen. I would like to know how should I deal with a girlfriend's parents or guardians. I am not a criminal nor drug addict, I am a decent person.
Illusion24 Posted March 7, 2005 Posted March 7, 2005 No matter what you do they will have a bias outlook on you...what you have to do is try your best to show them when you get the opportunity that race and ethnicity doesn't matter...what matters is the connection and love you have for that person...Love has no color nor does it have a race...The one that really has to except you is the person you're with...If she loves you and hides nothing then that right girl will not be afraid to introduce you to her parents... My bf is 4 years younger and I didn't introduce him to my parents until I was official with him and realized that it was serious...so if the girl is serious about you trust me she won't hide you from her parents...woman leave their homes to be with the one they love no matter what... Just remember make yourself happy first then worry about the rest...if you do what comes from your heart theirs no way it would back fire on you...be yourself thats all you can do
shamen Posted March 7, 2005 Posted March 7, 2005 Originally posted by knowman It happened with my last relationship when my ex-girlfriend refused to introduce me to her parents when she was introduced to my family. It hurt me deeply after we broke up and angry that her parents pressured her to end the relationship with me. I don't like people dictating my choices for me and allowed it to happen. I would like to know how should I deal with a girlfriend's parents or guardians. I am not a criminal nor drug addict, I am a decent person. I'm so sorry that this happened to you. That really stinks. I've dated someone outside of my race on several occasions as well and hope that the other person's family would accept me for who I am. And that my family would accept them. My step-mother is kind of an a**, and I don't think she would like it, but I personally wouldn't care about what she thought. Hopefully you meet someone for whom they can say that it doesn't matter what their parents think and just live their life. People should not be prejudiced anyway; they are living in a different era IMHO. I'm currently hanging out with someone who's mixed right now and to be honest, when we're together, I don't even think about this fact. He just is who he is.
blind_otter Posted March 7, 2005 Posted March 7, 2005 It just goes with the territory - I am of mixed race, and although I look pretty dern white I still get grief from some people regarding my race. Some people are just ignorant and you have to keep plugging away until you find someone who isn't encumbered by the racial issues. Sometimes it can get disheartening. It takes a really strong couple with strong values and all that to be able to handle the stresses of being of mixed race. Good luck!!!!
Urban Rubble01 Posted March 8, 2005 Posted March 8, 2005 Listen man, not only should you not listen to people who frown on "interracial" dating, you should do what you can to remove those bigots from your life. But I'm confused with what you're asking. Are you concerned that her parents won't accept that you're a different race ? By the way I'm white, my ex girlfriend (who I'm "on a break with", long story) is Cambodian. She's really dark skinned, alot of people actually think she's black. We've experienced small amounts of problems, but nothing major. However, my family is from Georgia and when we went on vacation down there we got a little more grief. It bothers me more than it does her, she just writes them off as ignorant, I have the urge to kill them. But really, it never affected our relationship, I wouldn't worry about it.
murs Posted September 26, 2005 Posted September 26, 2005 I know this is an old post but I've only started reading posts on and off, from this site back in May, but I wanted to write my comment in the hope it would help other people in a similar situation. I think there are more problems not listening to your heart than there are with putting up with other peoples crap. Once your feelings are more sorted down the track you will feel alot happier about the situation. I know this from experience. I am asian female (150cm) and my boyfriend (185cm) is white. We are an odd looking couple compared to the general population around us in Australia where I live. It use to bother me plenty. I have been going out with him for over 6 years now ... I was a little worried about the impact of what others would say about this and he is 3ish yrs younger! I am happy. No one has said a bad word yet. But I expect them too, but I feel strong enough now to know that people half the time are full of sh*t anyway. People tend to say comments(words) which they don't really think about and I don't take too much heart to. I am glad I've gotten stronger. Sometimes you have to know what you want (CLEAR full Pictures) to be strong, because there will always be people who are around you who can't get over there own pre-conceived ideas, or who think they know what is best for you. Cheers, to you mate, try and be strong, and find out what is important to you. And ignore other peoples comments. More of the time people comment without thinking anyways.
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