mortensorchid Posted September 27, 2014 Posted September 27, 2014 I was on the knife edge the other day, as some will recall from said post: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/494981-i-give-up-i-really-mean-time Tonight my FWB that I had been with for the last year or so had a phone call. I said I got my Halloween costume in the mail. He said he was busy tonight, Mr. Wishy Washy. I got the impression even though he didn't say anything about it that he had/has a date tonight with someone else. He said from now on we are just friends. I said "I see." He said "Yeah." I said "Thank you, I have enough friends. Bye." And hung up. He's called three times since then. I have not picked up the phone. I think I sensed the end was coming on his part. Let it be. Life goes on. Coldest blood runs through my veins, I will forge forward. Regret is unprofessional if someone is going to treat me like that. Another Friday night sad post in the community as it seems. Do not cry for me, we're all in this together.
Tayken Posted September 27, 2014 Posted September 27, 2014 @OP.....I wouldn't jump to such conclusions like you did. Did it ever occur to you that something might have happened today that is making him sad / react in such way? All you have gone and done is make the ubiquitous assumption, that there is another woman lurking or that he is now shagging someone else. This aside, you did say you two are FWBs right, surely this is an arrangement that you've enjoyed for a while, and it is bound to come to an end at some point? You owe it to him and yourself to actually hear his side...just sayin'
Dork Vader Posted September 27, 2014 Posted September 27, 2014 Okay I get why you would be up set when he says you are just a friend. How ever you are not acting very mature about this. I don't know your history with this man. But how do you know he did not have something else going on that was innocent? You're not giving yourself a chance by what you've just done. You should have told him. I care about you and I can't just be friends with you. I like you more then a friend and it's not fair to either of us. No matter what you chose you're not being mature at ALL. 2
xxoo Posted September 27, 2014 Posted September 27, 2014 I'm sorry you're hurting tonight. Did you want more than FWB with this guy?
Tayken Posted September 27, 2014 Posted September 27, 2014 ^ One of my red flags.....self centered i.e. me me me You won't believe the amount of women and am sure men out there like this.
LoneIsland Posted September 27, 2014 Posted September 27, 2014 Us men get told to be friends all the time. Its not the end of the world, just 1 less friend is all. 1
Cristo Posted September 27, 2014 Posted September 27, 2014 I was on the knife edge the other day, as some will recall from said post: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/494981-i-give-up-i-really-mean-time Tonight my FWB that I had been with for the last year or so had a phone call. I said I got my Halloween costume in the mail. He said he was busy tonight, Mr. Wishy Washy. I got the impression even though he didn't say anything about it that he had/has a date tonight with someone else. He said from now on we are just friends. I said "I see." He said "Yeah." I said "Thank you, I have enough friends. Bye." And hung up. He's called three times since then. I have not picked up the phone. I think I sensed the end was coming on his part. Let it be. Life goes on. Coldest blood runs through my veins, I will forge forward. Regret is unprofessional if someone is going to treat me like that. Another Friday night sad post in the community as it seems. Do not cry for me, we're all in this together. Well, if you guys are just FWB and not in a relationship, then it's really not your business what he's doing with other women (unless he's having unprotected sex with both you and them). This is why I don't do FWB. It creates too much of a mess. 6
Mister Zen Posted September 27, 2014 Posted September 27, 2014 Us men get told to be friends all the time. Its not the end of the world, just 1 less friend is all. Exactly. Its funny how a lot of women can't take their own medicine. Not necessarily talking about the OP. But many women will tell men to "suck it up" in situations where, if reversed, they would be crying in the fetal position. Same goes with rejection. They can dish it out all day. But let some handsome stud tell them to piss off and watch them sulk for a month. 4
MrNate 2.0 Posted September 27, 2014 Posted September 27, 2014 I was on the knife edge the other day, as some will recall from said post: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/494981-i-give-up-i-really-mean-time Tonight my FWB that I had been with for the last year or so had a phone call. I said I got my Halloween costume in the mail. He said he was busy tonight, Mr. Wishy Washy. I got the impression even though he didn't say anything about it that he had/has a date tonight with someone else. He said from now on we are just friends. I said "I see." He said "Yeah." I said "Thank you, I have enough friends. Bye." And hung up. He's called three times since then. I have not picked up the phone. I think I sensed the end was coming on his part. Let it be. Life goes on. Coldest blood runs through my veins, I will forge forward. Regret is unprofessional if someone is going to treat me like that. Another Friday night sad post in the community as it seems. Do not cry for me, we're all in this together. This is so dramatic for no reason. This guy isn't even your man. Heavens. 5
MrNate 2.0 Posted September 27, 2014 Posted September 27, 2014 Exactly. Its funny how a lot of women can't take their own medicine. Not necessarily talking about the OP. But many women will tell men to "suck it up" in situations where, if reversed, they would be crying in the fetal position. Same goes with rejection. They can dish it out all day. But let some handsome stud tell them to piss off and watch them sulk for a month. I know! A rejection?? Oh, woe is me.
Dork Vader Posted September 27, 2014 Posted September 27, 2014 Well, if you guys are just FWB and not in a relationship, then it's really not your business what he's doing with other women (unless he's having unprotected sex with both you and them). This is why I don't do FWB. It creates too much of a mess. This is complete non sense. If he is out sleeping around and sleeping with her it is 100% her business. STD's are very real and can be transmitted even if you use condoms. Condoms simply REDUCE the risk of transmission. Trust me I know I have herpes. You can also transmit Hep.C via oral sex You have an 80% chance of transmitting herpes even if you use condoms. If I sleep with someone while having an outbreak and use a condom they are likely to contract it. HPV can be transmittes orally as well. Condoms will not prevent pubic lice (crabs). This notion that you can safely sleep around is complete bs. You can not. It is 100% her business if he was sleeping around. You're a fool if you think other wise. But be my guest and buy into the media bs that you can sleep around safely. You'll end up like me and have HPV AND herpes.
quidproquo89 Posted September 27, 2014 Posted September 27, 2014 Us men get told to be friends all the time. Its not the end of the world, just 1 less friend is all. I was told recently, lets just be friends (''I would love to be your friend''). I followed that up wanting to meet as a mate and my text got ignored pfft.
quidproquo89 Posted September 27, 2014 Posted September 27, 2014 Well, if you guys are just FWB and not in a relationship, then it's really not your business what he's doing with other women (unless he's having unprotected sex with both you and them). This is why I don't do FWB. It creates too much of a mess. I'm old fashioned, but I only want to get intimate with somebody that I have feelings for 2
quidproquo89 Posted September 27, 2014 Posted September 27, 2014 I know! A rejection?? Oh, woe is me. we all feel bad from time to time because of rejection. This site is a way of venting, getting it off your chest and out of your system. Frankly, I use this site myself to express myself so that I don't let it affect me in real life. OP, you'll be fine you just got to get these feelings off your chest and then move on 1
Anela Posted September 27, 2014 Posted September 27, 2014 This is so dramatic for no reason. This guy isn't even your man. Heavens. She seems to have feelings for him. I don't like to tell people when they should stop, or be able to stop, having feelings for someone.
Anela Posted September 27, 2014 Posted September 27, 2014 Exactly. Its funny how a lot of women can't take their own medicine. Not necessarily talking about the OP. But many women will tell men to "suck it up" in situations where, if reversed, they would be crying in the fetal position. Same goes with rejection. They can dish it out all day. But let some handsome stud tell them to piss off and watch them sulk for a month. Bitter, bitter, bitter. Good job, guys, showing people how "nice" you are. 2
LoneIsland Posted September 27, 2014 Posted September 27, 2014 Same goes with rejection. They can dish it out all day. But let some handsome stud tell them to piss off and watch them sulk for a month. I'd never tell them to piss off, but then I am no handsome stud. On plenty of occasions when I did not respond immediately to their approaches because my signal processor was notoriously slow, they were absolutely destroyed. You won't believe how angry some would get. One even got me fired. What beesh. 2
Els Posted September 27, 2014 Posted September 27, 2014 I don't see anything wrong with what the OP did. They're not in a relationship. She had feelings for him, but he wasn't returning them. So she did what the guys here tell every guy who gets rejected to do - block the person and move on. In fact, based on reading her past threads, she should probably have done it ages ago. It's a bit of a double standard to pile on the OP for doing that exact same thing that all the rejected guys are told to do, don't you all think? 1
Author mortensorchid Posted September 27, 2014 Author Posted September 27, 2014 Slept on it. Feeling better. Life goes on. I think after so much time you fool yourself into thinking something that isn't happening, on both sides. I have a lot to offer someone, I know that. I think both need to rise to the plate and take a stand on something, at least he didn't do it by writing me an email, that would have been ultra cowardly (and that's happened before). But it's what it is now. Life goes on. 3
Maleficent Posted September 27, 2014 Posted September 27, 2014 Slept on it. Feeling better. Life goes on. I think after so much time you fool yourself into thinking something that isn't happening, on both sides. I have a lot to offer someone, I know that. I think both need to rise to the plate and take a stand on something, at least he didn't do it by writing me an email, that would have been ultra cowardly (and that's happened before). But it's what it is now. Life goes on. There. No matter the kind of relationship you have with someone, getting dumped always sucks. Though I'm sure there is a reason why he was your FWB for all this time and nothing serious came out of it...
Winherback Posted September 27, 2014 Posted September 27, 2014 Hang in there. I am 36 and I am starting to feel like life is one big break up lol. Been dating girl past 2 months (dated briefly in past) tell me last Sat on phone that she wanted to marry me, reiterated her seriousness... and now a few days later we srr having a you are doing too much for me, are we better as friends?, I dont communicate enough, etc, etc... Blows my mind. And yet, despite the natural despair and hopelessness that comes heavier in these moments as we age... I know I will be just fine down the road. But for now, it f**king stings. Just like for you. But like me, you will be just fine and a better person for this if you so choose.
Author mortensorchid Posted September 28, 2014 Author Posted September 28, 2014 You gotta learn how to stroke an ego. =/ My ego is fully intact. I am no longer an insecure woman who bends to the want and needs of others, which I think we are taught to do as children. Self centered? Of course. But necessary that women have to relearn at some point. I have not heard from him since Friday. I think life is too short to waste anymore on people who don't want the same things that you do, or those who take back, or those who will no simply take a risk from a serious to a smaller one, which he refuses to do. 2
Mister Zen Posted September 28, 2014 Posted September 28, 2014 Bitter, bitter, bitter. Good job, guys, showing people how "nice" you are. When did I ever say I was nice?
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