Mizz Layta Posted September 26, 2014 Posted September 26, 2014 He told me not to contact him anymore and he needs space.He recently lost his job so things are not going well for him.However, its been 2 weeks and I havent heard from him.I have a very strong urge to contact him but I want to respect his wishes. We live 4 hours apart and we have known each other for few years.I don't think he will walk away out of my life just like this .How can I fight this urge? I can't bring myself to delete him number either.
Natsu21 Posted September 26, 2014 Posted September 26, 2014 He said he wanted space. Be his friend and give him that. If he's ready to contact you, he will. You said you lived 4 hours away, right? Long distance relationships like that don't always last. It sounds like he's interested in someone else more than likely and you're the last to know. Sorry, but you don't ask to be away from someone you love or care about. Stay No Contact, it's over. 1
singsparkles Posted September 26, 2014 Posted September 26, 2014 He told me not to contact him anymore and he needs space.He recently lost his job so things are not going well for him.However, its been 2 weeks and I havent heard from him.I have a very strong urge to contact him but I want to respect his wishes. We live 4 hours apart and we have known each other for few years.I don't think he will walk away out of my life just like this .How can I fight this urge? I can't bring myself to delete him number either. Mizz Layta, You are not alone! I go through these urges every day, and some days it seems physically impossible to not contact them...but you need to stick to your guns! Any time you feel the urge to contact him, just come on this site and talk to people who will talk you out of it! I know this sounds harsh, but if he wanted to contact you, he would...and as sad as it seems, it's life. I'm going through the same thing. Every time my phone rings, I wish it was him, but it never is. You have to know that not contacting him is best for yourself and your heart. You do not want to get hurt any further. Take this time to focus on yourself and do things to make your life better and try new hobbies that will make you happy. Use this as "Me Time" .... it can be so therapeutic. This feeling your feeling will go away over time... You just really need to stick to no contact for atleast a month and you will feel a huge weight lifted off your shoulders. Im sorry you're feeling the way you do. I know it's hard and painful. But you need to know your worth is more than him! Your worth is precious and right now he is proving to you that he is not worthy of you!!! Remind yourself of your worth every second you feel like contacting him, and remind yourself that he doesn't deserve your contact with how he's acting! Hugs! xxx 1
FailedFirstLove Posted September 26, 2014 Posted September 26, 2014 It's the hardest thing to do.... It will be the biggest struggle Keep occupied but remeber that if u contact him u will be pushing him away more. That should scare you into not contacting. Or in my case. What my ex comes back and says scares me. It hurts so much. I couldn't continually put myself through it because after my anxiety would be throigh the roof and I would have to spend weeks calming myself back down. 1
me85 Posted September 26, 2014 Posted September 26, 2014 Play with a yo-yo, braid your hair, color your hair, blow bubbles, paint your toenails, say your abc's backwards, put a spoon on the tip of your nose and see if it will stay when you let go (practice makes perfect!) jump rope, turn on some tunes and dance, go outside and play, bake a cake, rearrange your furniture, clean out your closet, go through your bills, organize your pantry, make a grocery list, balance a book on your head while walking a straight line and chewing bubble gum... (= You've gone this long so just keep it up! GoFFL!!!! 1
Strength in Healing Posted September 26, 2014 Posted September 26, 2014 Imagine he just got the AIDS. Maybe he did! Seriously.
BC1980 Posted September 26, 2014 Posted September 26, 2014 I used to imagine the cold reception I would get if I broke NC. I realized he may not even answer the phone, and that was enough to keep me from contacting him. 1
Elle1975 Posted September 27, 2014 Posted September 27, 2014 You resist the urge by understanding that contacting him will make things worse. When you go away, you totally disappear, he just might think "wtf happened?". I say he "might", but honestly I'd take him to his word, and drill in my head that it's over. 1
mightycpa Posted September 27, 2014 Posted September 27, 2014 He told me not to contact him anymore and he needs spacer. Hi Mizz Layta. Please write me back. Tell me exactly how you'd have to feel in order to speak those words to him and mean it. After you do that, I'll tell you why you shouldn't contact him now.
Author Mizz Layta Posted September 27, 2014 Author Posted September 27, 2014 Hi Mizz Layta. Please write me back. Tell me exactly how you'd have to feel in order to speak those words to him and mean it. After you do that, I'll tell you why you shouldn't contact him now. He is the one who told me not to contact him anymore , not the other way around. Even though I missed him terribly, I am going to respect his wishes no matter how hard it is.
mightycpa Posted September 27, 2014 Posted September 27, 2014 He is the one who told me not to contact him anymore , not the other way around. Even though I missed him terribly, I am going to respect his wishes no matter how hard it is. I understand that. But what I'm asking you to do is to put yourself in his shoes. What would you have to feel in order to say those words to him? Knowing that should help you stay strong. 2
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