Is he holding out hope?

[oneinamillion]

I broke up with my bf a couple months ago.

 

I sent him an email apologizing -- and let him know that its a shame we didnt' work out and its disappointing. And I wished him all the best --- to say my peace.

 

He responded almost two days later with:

 

"I can’t believe things turned out the way they did either. It wasn’t in both of our interests how it exploded.

 

I accept your apology.

 

You know I leave Friday. I will take what you said on my trip. If you would be interested, we can have a chat when I get back. "

 

(Note: I yelled at him. We had a very heated argument. Hence, the reference to an explosion)

 

I didn't respond and went on vacation for a month. I am back and have not replied yet. I don't want to get back together and think its better if we don't. And I don't want him to think I do.

 

But I wonder if his email to me means he is still interested in me or is holding out hope?

Edited September 25, 2014 by oneinamillion

[sdrawkcaB ssA]

Sounds like your torn... seems like you enjoy your life enough to not turn around.

 

Do you need him as an EX, or are you worried he his hurt???

 

Any way you opened the door, and you must now find what you want and allow for discussion, whether or not you are done with your detachment.

[oneinamillion]

Thanks.

 

The way it ended was me yelling at him for checking my cell phone texts with my male friend (Tyler) and grabbing my phone from him forcefully.

 

I felt bad about what I did that night and I missed him so I sent him that email. In the email I also told him again that Tyler and I are just friends.

 

I do not ever want to get back together. I just want to know if he is ready for a friendship. If he has feelings or hope I don't want to mislead him or start talking to him again.

[littleblacksubmarine]

Can't say for sure as you can never know another persons thoughts or feelings, but probably yes. You should make sure he knows that you are not interested in getting back together. Make sure it's clear that you will always feel that way too, don't have him hanging on to hope with phrases like 'right now'.

 

Attempting to be friends with him if he still wants to be with you will only result in him hurting more and for longer. Friendship is not a realistic replacement for a relationship.

[Dontfindme]

Nice of you to apologize, but if you really care about him then you should let him heal through NC. It's not on you to wonder if he's holding out hope; NC from you will help kill it anyway.

 

Let him heal. And do your thing. Don't try to be his friend now, and for a while.

[loversquarrel]

If he hasn't contacted you in a months time and his last argument with you involved his belief that you may be interested in another guy, then i'd have to say he has no interest in you . I wouldn't be surprised if he kind of gave you the cold shoulder if you were to call him. He probably is sane and not wanting to deal with games.

[me85]

You said you don't want to get back together with him so leave him be. All he said was "We can have a chat when I get back if you want." He was just saying he was open to continuing the conversation another time. You're not obligated to respond to him.

 

You made your decision, gota stick by it...unless you realize in the future that you made a terrible mistake by ending things with him. Until then, just keep moving forward. He'll be just fine.

[mightycpa]

All you really know is how he FELT when he wrote the email. As you must know, feelings change.

 

It sounds like you're not interested, so let sleeping dogs lie. Don't respond if he contacts you. He'll get the message.

[oneinamillion]

Thanks everyone!! I will let it lie.