nat105 Posted March 7, 2005 Posted March 7, 2005 Hi I not sure what to do and I guess Im looking for a little advice on my situation my ex boyfriend broke up with me back last year in August 2004 although im still really upset by this time passed has helped. He broke up with me because we argued alot and because I got a txt from an ex boyfriend and I didnt tell him. I didnt think it was important and things were going really well between us and I didnt want to mention my ex it wasnt revelant. then he just said to me its over really harshly and I have never seen him since August. My ex is older than me Im 24 and he is 31 im hes first girlfriend. I tried desperetly hard to win him back for a couple of months I sent him little gifts and wrote him a letter which explained the usual that I loved him and missed him and that I wanted to get back together. Then In October last year two months after he left me he told me in an email never to contact him again and that he wanted nothing more to do with me he told me he didnt want me for a friend or a girlfriend and never will. I was devastated to hear this but I respected his wishes and left him alone then in December last year he sent me an email out of the blue which said how are you? I couldnt believe it he told me never to contact him again and he was so sure. so I was really surprized to hear from him. I never said anything about what he said back in october and was very plesant to him so we started sending emails regulary and this has carried on. This year in February we were IM each other quite alot it was genral chit chat. its really difficult to chat to someone after all that has happened when we were together we spoke about getting a place together and now we are wishing each other luck because we are both getting houses separately, its so strange. we are both on AOL and we both have profiles at the moment Im dating and I have put that on my marital status and he mentions that and wished me luck so I know hes been looking at my profile because I never told him I was dating. in our emails we write to one another I mentioned I was dating and he said he was too but he seems to repeat everything I say. I was hoping that the friendly emails and text messages would bring us back together again but its going nowhere I sent him an email the other day asking him what did he want from me because he never phones me or wants to meet up. he said he would like to be friends but dont friends meet up now and again and speak on the phone we have never spoken on the phone since we broke up I dont want to be the first one to call because he told me he wanted nothing to do with me. Im so confused because I left him alone when he wanted me too when he contacted me I was nice to him so that he could feel comfortable I just feel used. its hard to explain how I feel I still love him but it feels like it will be like this forever him texting me now and again and it never going anywhere its a horrible situation to be in. I dont know what he wants from me. has anyone ever been in this situation please help thank you
laRubiaBonita Posted March 7, 2005 Posted March 7, 2005 what did you argue about? he sounds pretty anal and controling.
Author nat105 Posted March 7, 2005 Author Posted March 7, 2005 we didnt really argue about anything bad it was over silly things really I cant even remember sometimes it was about my ex but there was nothing to worry about there. I just dont understand why he was like this towards me. I treated him well and I loved him. I didnt mind that he bought pictures of girls over the imternet although i did feel alittle pushed out but never showed it. I just dont know what hes intentions are now.
LittleMiss Posted March 7, 2005 Posted March 7, 2005 I would stop contact with him and try and move on. It sounds like he's keeping you on the back burner. He's giving into you enough because he knows you care about him, but he's not giving you more because he's not sure he wants you. Guys have played that game with me before. He's just keeping this limited contact with you to figure out what he wants. He knows how you feel about him since you tried so hard to get back together with him. If he really cared for you he would call or go see you. Don't waste your time waiting for him to make up his mind. If he's is going to treat you like this and talk to you like he wants nothing to do with you then he is not worth the anxiety he's putting you through.
clynn Posted March 8, 2005 Posted March 8, 2005 that seems like a really DUMB reason to dump someone. If that is enough to throw him off then you're better off without him.
unluckyinlove Posted March 8, 2005 Posted March 8, 2005 sorry that this has happened I had a similar situation its hard to say what he wants from you. I hope that you dont feel to bad your better off without him
unluckyinlove Posted March 12, 2005 Posted March 12, 2005 what did you argue about? I think you should avoid contact and see what happens because all he seems to be doing is messing you around men play games sometimes but you shouldnt have to put up with it
talie20 Posted March 16, 2005 Posted March 16, 2005 He totally flipped out over nothing with the whole text message thing. Ive gotten text messages from a guy ive been out with before, i didnt reply to them, and so didnt think it was necessary to tell my bf. He eventually saw the texts on my phone, got a little pissed off and then a little sad. Thankfully he got over it, but im sure it diminished his ego a little. I made him comfortable enough though and let him know that there was no one else out there for me but him. So I tried to rebuild his ego a little, even though I was truly monogomous and he had no need to be scared or threatened. Sounds like your guy overreacted to that stuff. Plus, it seems like guys always want to talk to you after you've left them or moved on. Its happened with the first guy ive dated. And its been happening with this second guy ive been dating...6 times! Every time I break up with him after he's shown me he doesnt care. Then I miss him and want to work through things. I call to clear the air and he doesnt want to talk about it. I stop contacting him and then all the sudden he is begging me to come back. My situation obvioiusly has problems too. Protect yourself from getting hurt though. You've been more than fair to him and you shouldnt be left wondering whats going on. Weird how boys always want to get your attention when you leave them alone...Its also annoying!!! Good luck with all your endeavors.
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