StGeorge22 Posted September 24, 2014 Posted September 24, 2014 Hi guys Haven't posted on her for ages. Found this site really useful when going thru a breakup so thought I'd post here to get some opinions. In a nutshell, my and my ex of five years broke up 2 year ago. She had depression to which she didn't think I supported her well enough. She owed me a bit of money which she took ages to pay back, so there was resentment on both sides. After not talking for 6 months, we started talking again to which I found out she was seeing a guy in a different state. I was shattered but went NC. After a month of that she came back and we tried on and off basically for the entire of last year. She wasn't over what her issues were and told me she is moving away for a fresh start. I asked if she was moving to the other state for the other guy to which she said no, but then I found out he was still there. She then told me they were just friends, but I didn't believe that . Anyway that was the start of this year. After 2 years of on and off I just decided I had enough. About 3 months later I met this awesome new girl. It's funny how things work, when you aren't looking for anything it falls in your lap. We have been together for about 4 months and I am happy with her and see a future. But it is scary to let someone new in after being hurt. My new girl has recently gone overseas for a month. I don't know why, but ivd found myself thinking of my ex quite a bit since my new girl has been gone. I think I realised that she could be moving home next year as her plan all along was to go for just one year. My question is this- have other people found the same thing? Happy and moved on to someone else, but still have thoughts about an ex? I know it's normal to, but just the last few weeks it has really been on my mind. Looking to hear from people who may have been thru the same! Thanks
HeartbrokenNewbie Posted September 24, 2014 Posted September 24, 2014 Think u might have yourself a rebound there x
GettingOver Posted September 24, 2014 Posted September 24, 2014 I have been in this situation. Twice. First time a rebound was like a painkiller for a month or so and I knew the guy was not right for me. After a month or so I started thinking about ex and couldn't stop until I met a man who turned my whole world upside down. I fell in love and forgot all exes. The problem was he was married, this roller coaster lasted 3,5 years. Then I broke up with him and met a good guy (well, so I thought) that I could see future with. BUT again in about a month or so I started missing ex, like really missing and wanting to see no matter what. I did my best to kill this feeling, but I could not. Still can't. Maybe you have a good girlfriend, but she is not enough to let ex go...
Author StGeorge22 Posted September 24, 2014 Author Posted September 24, 2014 Think you may both be right. Any suggestions? I really don't want to reach out to my ex and break NC
GettingOver Posted September 25, 2014 Posted September 25, 2014 Think you may both be right. Any suggestions? I really don't want to reach out to my ex and break NC If you are just missing ex a bit and have feelings to a new girl, then try to concentrate on a new girl, think of all the bad things you had with the ex. If you miss ex really a lot, still love her and your feelings to a new girl are rather fading away than growing - this relationship will hardly work. It doesn't mean that you have to contact ex though. Maybe you need time and space to sort out your feelings... 1
Arieswoman Posted September 25, 2014 Posted September 25, 2014 StGeorge22, I agree with GettingOver, you still have unresolved issues/feelings about your ex. This isn't fair on your new GF who is in the dark about how you feel. Breaking NC isn't the answer. Maybe time on your own is. Only you can decide how you play this, but leading the new GF on is not acceptable. Good luck.
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