Panatana90 Posted September 15, 2014 Posted September 15, 2014 Her sister recently gave birth, making my ex an aunt for the first time. I saw this on Facebook and we were going out while her sister was pregnant and I knew how excited she and the whole family were. I was close to the family as well. I don't want to get back together (she broke up with me out of the blue after four years) but feel it's a nice thing to do. Should I text my ex just saying congrats I'm happy for you all or just leave it?
me85 Posted September 15, 2014 Posted September 15, 2014 Do not make contact. And please remove her from your social media before you start seeing posts of her and a new guy. 4
mightycpa Posted September 15, 2014 Posted September 15, 2014 Leave it all behind. If you want to send congratulations, send them to the mother, along with a little gift for the baby. Ignore all incoming thanks from the aunt. Unless you two are already on regular speaking terms. I guess what I'm saying is, don't change what you're doing just because of this. 1
Strength in Healing Posted September 15, 2014 Posted September 15, 2014 You should text her congratulations as much as you should drink some plutonium. (Aka don't. Ever. EVER.)
Priv Posted September 15, 2014 Posted September 15, 2014 Just having read the title and not the post(s)... no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no and nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo 2
d0nnivain Posted September 15, 2014 Posted September 15, 2014 If you all that happy send the sister a nice note but don't contact your EX. 1
Simon Phoenix Posted September 15, 2014 Posted September 15, 2014 Her sister is the one who had the baby, not your ex. This reeks of fishing for contact. But yeah, congratulate the sister -- she's the one whose life is changing, not your ex.
Magnet Posted September 15, 2014 Posted September 15, 2014 If you were close to the family, then a congratulations to the sister is in order, as long as you keep it direct. But don't feel too bad if you realise that you simply don't want to. I wanted to congratulate my ex's father after he completed a long canoe ride for charity (we got on really great) but ended up deleting his email and number because sadly, he just reminded me of her. Sometimes a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do. P.s might be a good idea to delete your ex's sister and your ex off Facebook.... Umm.... 1
evanescentworld Posted September 15, 2014 Posted September 15, 2014 Just another echo here with the 'No...no....no...no...no......'
Author Panatana90 Posted September 18, 2014 Author Posted September 18, 2014 I initiated it for the first time since my gf of 4 years dumped me. At the end of the day, despite us both being civil (it was via texts) I took no satisfaction in it. I congratuled her and the family on the birth of a new baby, not necessary I know, but I was close to them all and wanted to do it. I don't have any other family members numbers. She did say she really wanted to contact me to let me know, but was afraid I didn't want to hear from her. SHall I just leave it at NC now?
sdrawkcaB ssA Posted September 18, 2014 Posted September 18, 2014 I thought you contacted her for closure... thinking you were not comfortable with doing so, you just wanted some peace of mind. If you felt guilty about how your relationship ended, then that would be another thing. For me, I would have steered clear, once you have NC, time completes the departure process. Obviously to get to the NC point, it was best for you both. Now that you opened the door, do you want friendship or closure??? If you want closure, you should have said so in first contact. If you think you can be a good friend, then you can contact her at a later time. To promptly contact her, would make it seem you're a bit clingy. Give a weeks time, to think of what you would say to allow casual contact time to time. No more than once a month. Unless she is active in contact. She has a separate life, and you must keep distance as at one time you were not in the picture as far as she was concerned.
mightycpa Posted September 18, 2014 Posted September 18, 2014 I initiated it for the first time since my gf of 4 years dumped me. At the end of the day, despite us both being civil (it was via texts) I took no satisfaction in it. I congratuled her and the family on the birth of a new baby, not necessary I know, but I was close to them all and wanted to do it. I don't have any other family members numbers. She did say she really wanted to contact me to let me know, but was afraid I didn't want to hear from her. SHall I just leave it at NC now? Yep...................
Author Panatana90 Posted September 22, 2014 Author Posted September 22, 2014 She said she has wanted to talk to me, but was afraid I didn't want to hear from her. Breadcrumb?
Chi townD Posted September 22, 2014 Posted September 22, 2014 Probably. What did she want to talk about?
BC1980 Posted September 22, 2014 Posted September 22, 2014 She said she has wanted to talk to me, but was afraid I didn't want to hear from her. Breadcrumb? Yes, it's a breadcrumb. Most likely, if you ask her why she wants to talk, she will say to catch up. It's cruel really. She says she is worried you didn't want to hear from her because she knows you are hurting and probably angry. But she put her own want to talk to you ahead of how you might feel if she contacts you.
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