PLEASE HELP ME! best friends with the guy or date him? HELP ME!!!

[massive_confusion]

i am horribly confused... i am dating my best guy friend matt now.we've been friends since i moved here 3 years ago. his last g/f is my best friend and my last b/f was his best guy friend. well he dated my best friend katie for 3 months and there was nothing really there and i dated his best friend alex for a little over a year. my relationship with alex was pretty horrible... i tried to break up with him a million times. it was the boyfriend you go back to 20 times out of bad habit...like they say. alex constantly ditched matt to hang out with me... they weren't very close. me and matt were extremely close and alex was constantly jealous and accusing us so me n alex were always fighting. then i realized i had a lot of feelings for matt whenever we were just joking around one day and he said something and i got the butterflies and then he said he was joking... so i knew this was wrong and i tried to make it go away for about 4 months but it didn't work.

 

well then alex became controlling he would not let me go anywhere if i could hang out with him that day instead and he wanted me to do sexual things i wasn't into so i broke up with him.

 

then alex n matt got into a big fight over something that did not involve me. matt admitted to liking me and i admitted it my feelings for him too it was rather shocking... we decided to just stay friends for a while and then matt told alex because he couldn't take lying to him alex then said it was okay for him to date me after spazzing out a good bit. 2 weeks later me and matt started dating, and i have never liked anyone nearly as much as i do with him... basically me n matt are perfect together.

 

the problems are alex now decides he hates both of us with all of his heart he has not spoken to either one of us in about 2 or 3 months... the last time he spoke to me he said that i was a slut and a bitch but he was still in "love" with me... eventhough he's been dating some girl for a while now...?

 

the other problem is all of my friends think i am making a mistake by dating matt now because i am just going to ruin my friendship with him... and that scares me eventhough matt has promised me we would always be best friends no matter what... and he always keeps his promises (that's why we don't make promises a lot}

 

should i care what alex thinks and my friends think? and are we going to always be friends?

[SuperFantastico]

Ok to the first question. No you should not care about what alex thinks. He said you were a slut/bitch AND said he loved you in the same sentence!! Hes crazy F-him.

 

To the second question, your friends arnt dating matt you are. Its about your happiness. Now things could go wrong with matt BUT as they say nothing ventured nothing gained. People who can take big risks can reap big rewards. (and various other peppy slogans )

 

If you are as perfect together as you say, then i wouldnt worry too much about it. You have a close friend who is also your boyfriend. Count yourself lucky.

 

P.S. Its pretty damn hard to lose a close friend. I've got tons of friends who are still pretty close with thier ex's.

[massive_confusion]

okay... thanks... so far things are looking good except his mother who has loved me to death since me n matt have been friends now claims that i have matt "whipped" which i find horribly interesting seeing as how whenever he makes plans with me...well lately...he breaks them :-/ so yeah whatever that means...