irc333 Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 I had emailed a woman in my area, new to the site. She had quite a descriptive and intelligible profile as I sent her an email that was similar in nature, addressing certain aspects of her pesronality in her write-up and asking her favorite hobbies. Her response: "Hello IRC" Yep, that's all she responded with. I responded with, "Hi, ...so do you speak English, or is that all you have to say? LOL"
PegNosePete Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 Funny story! Do you have a question? 2
Keenly Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 Just yesterday I was exchanging messages with a girl. About the fifth volley, I sent her a few paragraphs about mutual interests, TV shows, some jokes and references to things she had listed as liking. At the end of this lengthy message, I asked her what her favorite show was. This is the entire message that I got back. "Stargate SG-1"
PegNosePete Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 ^ Dude she's a keeper! Ask her what she thought of SG Universe. That's a good way of filtering the real sci-fi fans from the pretenders.
jay1983 Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 Just yesterday I was exchanging messages with a girl. About the fifth volley, I sent her a few paragraphs about mutual interests, TV shows, some jokes and references to things she had listed as liking. At the end of this lengthy message, I asked her what her favorite show was. This is the entire message that I got back. "Stargate SG-1" Most people use the app on their phones. It's kinda hard to type a paragraph with a little phone. Much less look over a long message and respond to everything. 1
sillyanswer Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 Just yesterday I was exchanging messages with a girl. About the fifth volley, I sent her a few paragraphs about mutual interests, TV shows, some jokes and references to things she had listed as liking. At the end of this lengthy message, I asked her what her favorite show was. This is the entire message that I got back. "Stargate SG-1" At least she's responding! Ask her out for a date at a sci-fi convention. Or just for a drink.
Keenly Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 Most people use the app on their phones. It's kinda hard to type a paragraph with a little phone. Much less look over a long message and respond to everything. I get that, and I'm guilty of it too, but these conversations are all ebb and no flow. Its like I'm talking to a wall. Do these people just not understand what a conversation really entails ? 2
Keenly Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 At least she's responding! Ask her out for a date at a sci-fi convention. Or just for a drink. No sci fi conventions around here, only once a year if I'm lucky . Why would I ask this person out when their terrible communication skills and lack of desire to either joke around, or get to know me on any basic level isnt present? No thanks. I don't waste my time with girls that don't show at least a small amount of interest. Indifference, aloof, anytime I get the vibe they didn't actually read the message and are only responding because they are on auto pilot, I'm out.
sillyanswer Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 Its like I'm talking to a wall. Do these people just not understand what a conversation really entails ? I've had the same thoughts. Sometimes I concluded that the woman had no conversational skills (at least in the context of on a dating site where it's all too easy for the conversation to die), sometimes I concluded that she wasn't interested in me but was too polite to ignore me, and sometimes I concluded that she was on a phone etc. Taking the most optimistic line, the course of action seems to be to have a conversation where she doesn't have to type... ideally in person.
sillyanswer Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 No sci fi conventions around here, only once a year if I'm lucky . Why would I ask this person out when their terrible communication skills and lack of desire to either joke around, or get to know me on any basic level isnt present? No thanks. I don't waste my time with girls that don't show at least a small amount of interest. Indifference, aloof, anytime I get the vibe they didn't actually read the message and are only responding because they are on auto pilot, I'm out. Fair enough! and often that's what I did.
central Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 I want an articulate answer, and something that encourages continued exchanges. Otherwise, I suspect they're "dumber than a bag of hammers" and seek out the next person. One with a working brain! 1
PegNosePete Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 At least she's responding! Ask her out for a date at a sci-fi convention. Or just for a drink. Exactly. Chances are she's bored of talking about TV shows on the internet with some dude, just like she has with the last 20 dudes who messaged her. She wants to meet up for a date, but he's not asking her, so she loses interest and gives 1-word replies.
Keenly Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 Exactly. Chances are she's bored of talking about TV shows on the internet with some dude, just like she has with the last 20 dudes who messaged her. She wants to meet up for a date, but he's not asking her, so she loses interest and gives 1-word replies. I don't ask some one on a date after less than 20 minutes of interaction.
Disillusioned Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 LOL me Tarzan you Jane *grunt grunt*
Michelle ma Belle Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 Yep. Been here many times. Bottom line is that at this point in my life, I just don't have the patience for all ebb and no flow. Communication is a two way street. Period. Phone or no phone. It's very simple for me. Thank and release. NEXT!
organizedchaos Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 I get that, and I'm guilty of it too, but these conversations are all ebb and no flow. Its like I'm talking to a wall. Do these people just not understand what a conversation really entails ? That's why you don't waste time messaging back and forth. Boring. Take it offline ASAP. 3
Keenly Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 That's why you don't waste time messaging back and forth. Boring. Take it offline ASAP. See my previous post. I'm not desperate enough to ask for a meetup after three or four volleys and 20 minutes of conversation.
jay1983 Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 See my previous post. I'm not desperate enough to ask for a meetup after three or four volleys and 20 minutes of conversation. Her number bro, ask for her number. 1
Keenly Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 Her number bro, ask for her number. When I get to the point where I'm comfortable doing that, I'll give them my number, and sign off. If they want to keep talking to me, they are welcome to, but asking for a girls number or asking her on a date when literally the ONLY thing we have talked about is one TV show is not how I operate. I'm a deeper level than that. That isn't a connection of any kind, that's the same conversation I would have with my co worker from Vietnam. 1
PegNosePete Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 If what you're doing is working well for you, carry on. If not then you might want to think about changing your methods. 2
central Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 (edited) When I get to the point where I'm comfortable doing that, I'll give them my number, and sign off. If they want to keep talking to me, they are welcome to, but asking for a girls number or asking her on a date when literally the ONLY thing we have talked about is one TV show is not how I operate. I'm a deeper level than that. That isn't a connection of any kind, that's the same conversation I would have with my co worker from Vietnam. I agree. I was slow to take things offline, because I wanted to establish some baseline compatibility first. That eliminated hundreds of contacts, of course. Those whom I actually met after establishing a baseline were consistently compatible, good prospects. Many did not elicit any "chemistry" however, so a date or two was as far as it went. But when there was chemistry (strong physical attraction), we already knew we were reasonably compatible in other ways, so things could progress well from there. (If the goal is mainly to get laid, by all means take it offline ASAP!) Edited September 11, 2014 by central
sillyanswer Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 See my previous post. I'm not desperate enough to ask for a meetup after three or four volleys and 20 minutes of conversation. Nothing wrong with that approach. Some women will be sitting at the other end of the phone thinking "well is he going to ask for my number or not?" and lose interest when you don't ask sooner (especially if someone else does), but perhaps those aren't the right women for you.
Author irc333 Posted September 11, 2014 Author Posted September 11, 2014 Funny ... this woman desired to take our conversation to texting. Lol. She was the one that brought it up. I asked for her #....she gave it to. Me lol
organizedchaos Posted September 12, 2014 Posted September 12, 2014 See my previous post. I'm not desperate enough to ask for a meetup after three or four volleys and 20 minutes of conversation. That's not a sign of desperation. It's how to succeed at OLD (note I'm not just talking about hookups either). Take it offline and get to know her THAT way. But if you know better and are getting results your way, more power to you. My last ex of 3 years I met on match. My current gf I met on tinder. But what do I know? 1
FitChick Posted September 13, 2014 Posted September 13, 2014 You aren't having a conversation, you are texting. Talk on the phone and have a conversation. Some people just don't like to type. You can tell much more about someone by hearing their voice.
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