emmahattie Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 (edited) I've basically been talking to a guy for around a month now. We've been on a couple of dates etc and have insane amounts of chemistry when we have spent time together. He's such a lovely guy and even admits that he's 'too nice' and I can definitely see that. Last week he went to a festival for 4 days so we had no contact for the whole time that he was there, the last text he sent was just like he usually texts me - cheery and sweet. He's been back from the festival for 4 days now but it seems like ever since he got back things have changed. Before he was pretty good at replying to my texts and if he fell asleep before he could reply he'd always text me when he woke up or when he got off of work for the day. But now he's taking hours and hours to reply (we're only sending about 6 messages back and forth), and the conversation isn't as 'fruitful' if you will. He has also got into the habit of just not replying...last night he didn't text me back at all and throughout the whole of today I didn't hear from him so I sent him a text around 8pm just asking how he is etc. so we sent a few texts back and forth and yet again he hasn't replied. Right know, I know that he's pretty ill with the flu so he's been in bed all day so I'm not sure whether this is the reason he's been crap at replying. Is that even a valid reason? Also I left some of my stuff at his so I did text him and say can I just meet him in town to collect it and he said 'of course we can' and put a little smiley and asked if we could meet when he's feeling better. He's a genuinely nice guy and the times that we've met he's gone out of his way to come pick me up, he put on the films that I love and brought my favourite ice cream for us to eat (just one example)... Now before anyone jumps on me saying that I'm being clingy or I'm being stupid/naive, I'd just like to add that I do have some underlying issues from previous relationships and have extreme anxiety and I'm just getting used to being back in the dating game after 3 years so I feel very confused and aware right now! But it would be great if anyone could make some light on the situation for me! Edited September 11, 2014 by emmahattie
Fondue Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 He's tired (and evidently sick) from the festival. He's still recovering. Give him time to get back into good physical health before re-assessing this situation, in my opinion.
Atticus9292012 Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 The guy is sick.....give him a break.
Author emmahattie Posted September 11, 2014 Author Posted September 11, 2014 The guy is sick.....give him a break. I have had it in my head that it could be down to the fact that he is pretty ill, but I don't want to make the mistake of giving him excuses when really he could have gone off me for all I know. I just wasn't sure that not texting me for the whole day (and seemingly having no intention to) was something that should make me second guess whether he really does want to continue things with me. Obviously I'll see when I see him to get my stuff but I don't want to be chasing something pointless for the billionth time in the meantime. This all seems very out of character for him which is what made me worry.
Atticus9292012 Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 Just give him some space and let him get well. If he doesn't get in touch, plenty of fish in the sea. Too soon to know really. 2
mightycpa Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 Just give him some space and let him get well. If he doesn't get in touch, plenty of fish in the sea. Too soon to know really. Yeah, don't chase him. Let him get well. Bring him some friggin' soup and tissues or something. Stop worrying about yourself, and prove you are someone he should be pursuing.
writergal Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 He just got back from a music festival and has the flu. Legitimate reason for not replying to your texts as promptly as he did before. Text him that you hope he feels better soon and then ask him to give you a call when he is recovered and ready to meetup with you again. If he blows you off, oh well, just move on to the 'next' single guy. Life's too short to worry about the reason why someone rejects you. But as others have said, it's too early to tell what his motives with you are long-term, b/c he's at home sick right now. Give him space and let him come to you.
90s kid Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 Text him that you hope he feels better soon and then ask him to give you a call when he is recovered and ready to meetup with you again. I agree with this. Throw the ball back in his court. If he doesn't call you in a few days once he's feeling better, then you'll have your answer.
mightycpa Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 Gals and kids, I have to disagree. Don't leave him alone. Go take care of him a little. Even if he blows you off after, you did the nice thing for someone who was sick. Nothing wrong with that.
Assasda Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 Call him on the darn phone if youre trying to talk to him. Texting just conveys small bits of info. Call him if you care
Zippy2000 Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 Well, in my opinion. I think he's losing interest. Coincidently after the festival. I was I'll in hospital a couple of years ago and I swear how good was it to be in regular contact with people and to just even get one text. So being I'll doesn't cut it for me. I believe after a month his interest is waning. Give it another couple of weeks and if things don't improve then you all see for yourself.
Diezel Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 It's one thing to be in the hospital, it's another to be at home with the flu. Two different environments. I've been in both and while I was at home and could barely move, I just wanted to Netflix my brain out. When I was in the hospital for two days and didn't have access to the internet or the TV had 3 stations, I wanted nothing more than to just text/call people. To the OP: Listen, either 1 of 2 things happened: (1) He truly is sick and just wants to ride this out. Give him a few days. CALL him, stop the texting nonsense if it is making you uneasy. Hell offer to come over and bring him chicken soup. (2) He met someone at the festival that he now likes better than you. Either way, both situations are hinting at you backing off over the next few days. His actions over the course of the next week will speak louder than texts. 1
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