welsh_dolphin Posted September 9, 2014 Posted September 9, 2014 hi there, I'm Jess and I'm new. June 30th, me and my husband split up, we've been together 8 and a half years and married 6 and a half years. we had been trying for a baby for 7 years, found out we would need IVF as problems with both of us. i had to loose weight, but my depression took over and i got bigger, not smaller, in January i started to loose weight and i have so far lost almost 3 stone back in march, hubs turned round and said he no longer wanted a baby, we had a rough few weeks, but talked and agreed to both think on things from the others views. June 29th we were great, having sex, june 30th, we were over. he got it in his head i want a baby more than him, ive told him it him i want, a future with him, i have got used to the idea that a baby wasnt meant to be, with my depression i don't want to put myself through ivf, i am really happy as a aunty to our nieces and nephew but he is digging his heels in and saying, this is the right thing. i am so heartbroken and lost, I've already been self harming and I've attempted an overdose. i just don't know how to cope
Hollywood-Tourist Posted September 9, 2014 Posted September 9, 2014 First of all I'm sorry this has happened. I am going through a similar scenario with my fiancé so I can relate to you in some ways. Can I ask has either of you mentioned divorce yet? Also, could you not sit him down & talk to him saying you were sorry but didn't realise you were being a little selfish (if you didn't seek his thoughts on a baby beforehand) and that you want to try again? Please don't do anything silly like suicide (although I have felt that way with my fiancé choking me since I miss her so much) it's a permanent solution to a temporary problem. You can always talk to me on here, I WILL listen to you. Chin up! x 1
doeblin Posted September 9, 2014 Posted September 9, 2014 I am very sorry about your situation. It's good you are reaching out to the community. Please, feel free to write about your life. We are listening. Self harm is something serious though. I think you should call the local helpline today! (In wales I think it's: 0800 132 737 or 08457 90 90 90) Keep us updated!
slizl Posted September 9, 2014 Posted September 9, 2014 Definitely get professional help. Try to keep your head up, everything will be okay! 1
Author welsh_dolphin Posted September 10, 2014 Author Posted September 10, 2014 thanks all. im seeing a psychologist, and together we are seeing relate. just finding him so frustrating, he keeps changing what hes saying. feel like im hitting my head against a brick wall
Author welsh_dolphin Posted September 10, 2014 Author Posted September 10, 2014 Neither of us have mentioned divorce, and it was him who wanted to start trying for a baby to start with.
Ducktapetherapy Posted September 12, 2014 Posted September 12, 2014 It is great news that you are getting some counseling! We all feel lost at times, whether we admit it or not! A good psychologist can help you both get back on track. I know of some great phone counseling services; let me know if you would like more information. ~Ducktapetherapy
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