Darren2013 Posted September 7, 2014 Posted September 7, 2014 One of my biggest weaknesses as a human being is gluttony and eating junk food. Eating too much junk food can be a turn off to women if I do it in their presence. For this reason I try not to order the food I really want to eat when I am out on a dinner date. I usually order a more vegetarian meal on those dates just so I don't take the risk of offending my date. Although at some point if the relationship gets serious she may want to know why I am 20 pounds overweight.
Diezel Posted September 7, 2014 Posted September 7, 2014 Uh, what? You've got some deeper issues you need to resolve. If you feel like you need to hide something on the first few dates, you're doing it wrong. 5
michellew Posted September 7, 2014 Posted September 7, 2014 I agree with Deizel, sounds like some deeper issues here. Be yourself and order what you want! If a woman agreed to go on a date with you to begin with, she obviously doesn't care about the extra weight. Besides, 20 pounds is easy to hide on a man! FYI...I LOVE meat and if a guy ordered a vegetarian meal on our date it would make ME feel like the glutton. I'd also worry that our eating lifestyles would clash at some point. 3
veggirl Posted September 7, 2014 Posted September 7, 2014 Most people aren't vegetarians so I'm not sure how ordering as such would score you points. I'm a vegetarian and my bf isn't...it's never been a problem and he's never ordered based on my diet. Can you give an example of what you'd like to order vs what you actually order? Even if you order heathy choices on the first few dates, how long you expect to hide your love of junk food? 3
Author Darren2013 Posted September 7, 2014 Author Posted September 7, 2014 I didn't say it would score me points but it does keep me from being penalized. Not talking about exes on dates doesn't score points either but it keeps one from getting penalized. As far as what I really order when I am by myself I order a steak or cheeseburger with fries and no vegetables. I do not like to eat any green vegetables. The junk food thing may be a legitimate concern. What might go through her mind is "Is he going to be running in and out of the hospital for degenerative diseases if I stay with him long term? If so that means I will end up taking care of him or he may die early on me of a heart attack". 1
Gloria25 Posted September 7, 2014 Posted September 7, 2014 I agree with others...why are you trying to hide something? If you are overweight, your date isn't gonna take long to figure out it either is your diet, activity level or both...More than likely it'll be diet - as when people are trying to lose weight, they normally start with changes in their diet. And, why go to the extreme of ordering something vegetarian? When I go out on dates or am eating with someone, I don't change "who" I am, I just be sensible as to what I eat... For example, I won't order really greasy, fishy, or certain italian dishes cuz of one, the restaurants put animal grease in their foods (to give it flavor) and I don't want my stomach to be all bloated from trying to process that mess - especially if I'm wearing something sexy on a date or sex is gonna happen later. Also, you DON'T want that food coming through your pores when you get sweaty. But yeah, I don't try to hide who I am - I mean, it's gonna come out eventually. And I want a guy who can eat meat. While I eat more poultry and stuff than red meat, and I cook/eat sensibly (i.e. soy milk and stuff) - I don't believe in a vegetarian diet and would be turned off by a guy who was into one. I also have a good appetite - especially after a swim (like right now) and I don't want a man who eats less than I do or eats like a bird.
Gloria25 Posted September 7, 2014 Posted September 7, 2014 If so that means I will end up taking care of him or he may die early on me of a heart attack". Well, if you're looking for a long-term/serious mate - then what "do" you think her responsibility is? If she cares for you and you are in a serious RL, more than likely she's gonna cook for you. What YOU have to do is do your part and learn from her and not "cheat" (i.e. eating crap on the side) and start taking care you your body...Cuz that's what RLs are about - pleasing each other and doing what we can to make ourselves attractive/presentable to our SOs. I mean, one of my pet-peeves is with my siblings' wives. Of the divorced one, I couldn't stand her cuz she wasn't taking care of my sibling. She didn't cook, and when she "did" it was frying crap. Then, she discouraged my sibling from going to the gym by mocking him and saying she didn't appreciate him coming home sweaty (like how else are you gonna come from a gym, dry and smelling like roses?). Now, the other sibling, his wife is learning to cook and is taking care of my other sibling...I'm glad she's come a long way.
michellew Posted September 7, 2014 Posted September 7, 2014 I didn't say it would score me points but it does keep me from being penalized. Not talking about exes on dates doesn't score points either but it keeps one from getting penalized. As far as what I really order when I am by myself I order a steak or cheeseburger with fries and no vegetables. I do not like to eat any green vegetables. The junk food thing may be a legitimate concern. What might go through her mind is "Is he going to be running in and out of the hospital for degenerative diseases if I stay with him long term? If so that means I will end up taking care of him or he may die early on me of a heart attack". No offense, but your rationale is absurd and you are way overthinking this. If I am on a first date and the guy orders a steak or cheeseburger and fries I am thinking, "Yum, that looks good! Think he'll mind if I steal a fry or two?". It's a FIRST DATE... I'm definitely not worried about cholesterol levels and heart disease!! 2
Author Darren2013 Posted September 7, 2014 Author Posted September 7, 2014 I agree with others...why are you trying to hide something? If you are overweight, your date isn't gonna take long to figure out it either is your diet, activity level or both...More than likely it'll be diet - as when people are trying to lose weight, they normally start with changes in their diet. And, why go to the extreme of ordering something vegetarian? When I go out on dates or am eating with someone, I don't change "who" I am, I just be sensible as to what I eat... For example, I won't order really greasy, fishy, or certain italian dishes cuz of one, the restaurants put animal grease in their foods (to give it flavor) and I don't want my stomach to be all bloated from trying to process that mess - especially if I'm wearing something sexy on a date or sex is gonna happen later. Also, you DON'T want that food coming through your pores when you get sweaty. But yeah, I don't try to hide who I am - I mean, it's gonna come out eventually. And I want a guy who can eat meat. While I eat more poultry and stuff than red meat, and I cook/eat sensibly (i.e. soy milk and stuff) - I don't believe in a vegetarian diet and would be turned off by a guy who was into one. I also have a good appetite - especially after a swim (like right now) and I don't want a man who eats less than I do or eats like a bird. You say you won't eat anything greasy if sex is going to happen later. Why? Are you afraid you may pass gas during sex?
Author Darren2013 Posted September 7, 2014 Author Posted September 7, 2014 No offense, but your rationale is absurd and you are way overthinking this. If I am on a first date and the guy orders a steak or cheeseburger and fries I am thinking, "Yum, that looks good! Think he'll mind if I steal a fry or two?". It's a FIRST DATE... I'm definitely not worried about cholesterol levels and heart disease!! I thought the whole point of dating is to evaluate how much potential there is for a long term building a life with someone.
Ronni_W Posted September 7, 2014 Posted September 7, 2014 For this reason I try not to order the food I really want to eat when I am out on a dinner date. I usually order a more vegetarian meal Do you mean, then, to permanently change your food preferences and intake *IF* it ends up being a long-term relationship? Otherwise, *IF* it ends up becoming an LTR, how/when do you plan to show your actual food preferences and quantity you like to eat?
Author Darren2013 Posted September 7, 2014 Author Posted September 7, 2014 Do you mean, then, to permanently change your food preferences and intake *IF* it ends up being a long-term relationship? Otherwise, *IF* it ends up becoming an LTR, how/when do you plan to show your actual food preferences and quantity you like to eat? I still plan to eat junk food in front of her once in awhile but she won't know the full extent as to how often I eat it when nobody is around. For example she may think I indulge twice a month when I really eat it everyday.
hellon Posted September 7, 2014 Posted September 7, 2014 One of my biggest weaknesses as a human being is gluttony and eating junk food. Eating too much junk food can be a turn off to women if I do it in their presence. For this reason I try not to order the food I really want to eat when I am out on a dinner date. I usually order a more vegetarian meal on those dates just so I don't take the risk of offending my date. Although at some point if the relationship gets serious she may want to know why I am 20 pounds overweight. Umm... if she isn't wondering why you're 20lbs overweight on the first date, she's not going to START wondering a couple of months in, unless you're planning on only ever eating vegetables in her presence, then binging on the junk food when you're alone... If so, that's a bigger issue. Otherwise, I agree with not putting it all out there on a first date, but can you compromise somehow? Like get a burger with a salad side, instead of fries? 1
michellew Posted September 7, 2014 Posted September 7, 2014 I thought the whole point of dating is to evaluate how much potential there is for a long term building a life with someone. It is, but you should be yourself when determining long term potential, not someone who pretends to like salad. Have some fun and relax a little. Your dates will go a lot further if you do.
Gloria25 Posted September 7, 2014 Posted September 7, 2014 You say you won't eat anything greasy if sex is going to happen later. Why? Are you afraid you may pass gas during sex? Lol...Doesn't matter what I eat before or during sex, I'm always worrying about "tooting" - whether the sounds come out of my lady parts or behind...lol (cuz sometimes you pray that he doesn't mistake a "toot" from your lady parts to be an actual fart...lol) But seriously, because of how restaurant food is prepared (grease and stuff), my stomach might bloat and that's not cute when you're wearing a sexy outfit or something showing your belly-ring. Also, yes, what you eat comes out of your pores...One time a bf and I had italian and the next morning we woke up and I could smell the garlic coming out of our pores...lol. So, when I've had a evening with an SO, I would lay out "light" stuff (i.e. wine, cheese, crackers, and salad) cuz one time I had greasy sandwiches in between the sex and I felt yucky. Now, once you are in an established RL, you're not always gonna be able to plan for sex and control what you eat. I'm just saying that when I "am" in situations where I can anticipate sex will happen - I'm very mindful of what I eat.
Ronni_W Posted September 7, 2014 Posted September 7, 2014 I still plan to eat junk food in front of her once in awhile but she won't know the full extent as to how often I eat it when nobody is around. For example she may think I indulge twice a month when I really eat it everyday. Ah...so lying and deception, then? Why do you think any woman would be more likely to tolerate you lying to and deceiving her, than the fact that you eat junk food? On the other side, would you consider reducing your junk food intake for your own peace of mind and also physical health? It just sounds like a bad habit, or even addiction, that is obviously causing you concern, anxiety, guilt, self-recriminations, etc. 1
DazedandConfused8 Posted September 7, 2014 Posted September 7, 2014 One of my biggest weaknesses as a human being is gluttony and eating junk food. Eating too much junk food can be a turn off to women if I do it in their presence. For this reason I try not to order the food I really want to eat when I am out on a dinner date. I usually order a more vegetarian meal on those dates just so I don't take the risk of offending my date. Although at some point if the relationship gets serious she may want to know why I am 20 pounds overweight. There's middle ground between "glutton for junk food" and vegetarian. Sandwiches, seafood, delicious salads with meat on them, wraps, etc... 2
Gloria25 Posted September 8, 2014 Posted September 8, 2014 You know, there was a Sex and the City show where Samantha was sleeping with a guy who had "funky spunk"...and, she was trying to get him to drink herbs to change his "taste"... Thankfully, I've never met a guy with that problem. And that also makes me watch my coffee and beer intake...cuz I drink a lot of coffee and I want "down there" to taste nice (yes, I check it to see how its tasting). I mean, no one is perfect and I'm not a clean/health freak, but I don't wail in the mud either..I was with a smoker for over 6 years and as long as he had a toothbrush and toothpaste handy, I was a happy camper...and, if he didn't he'd like kiss me on the neck and stuff...
bubbaganoosh Posted September 8, 2014 Posted September 8, 2014 I dated a girl who was on a serious health kick and it seemed that everything I ate, she had a comment for. This is not good for you, that's not good for you and blah, blah, blah, and one day we went to dinner and I order a prime rib that was the mother of all prime rib and I ate it all including the fat, baked potato with a pint of sour cream on it and strawberry short cake loaded with whipped cream. She didn't say much on the way home and I was too full to say anything but I finally told her this is who I am. I accept you for who you are so do the same for me. Naturally it didn't last. If she wants to eat seeds and grass like that fine, but don't put me down for what I eat. 4
Gloria25 Posted September 8, 2014 Posted September 8, 2014 I dated a girl who was on a serious health kick and it seemed that everything I ate, she had a comment for. This is not good for you, that's not good for you and blah, blah, blah, and one day we went to dinner and I order a prime rib that was the mother of all prime rib and I ate it all including the fat, baked potato with a pint of sour cream on it and strawberry short cake loaded with whipped cream. She didn't say much on the way home and I was too full to say anything but I finally told her this is who I am. I accept you for who you are so do the same for me. Naturally it didn't last. If she wants to eat seeds and grass like that fine, but don't put me down for what I eat. And, that ^^ is what I kinda wanted to say w/o offending people with certain dietary habits and/or beliefs about killing chickens and cows. Some of them think they can impose their beliefs on others....I was listening to my podcast where some woman was upset because she was vegan and people she was inviting to her party who were not vegan were upset because she didn't serve alternatives to vegan food....that's wrong. I have a vegetarian in the family and we don't stop putting meat on the table cuz of her and thankfully she hasn't said a thing cuz I would have had to set her straight. 1
hellon Posted September 8, 2014 Posted September 8, 2014 (edited) And, that ^^ is what I kinda wanted to say w/o offending people with certain dietary habits and/or beliefs about killing chickens and cows. Some of them think they can impose their beliefs on others....I was listening to my podcast where some woman was upset because she was vegan and people she was inviting to her party who were not vegan were upset because she didn't serve alternatives to vegan food....that's wrong. I have a vegetarian in the family and we don't stop putting meat on the table cuz of her and thankfully she hasn't said a thing cuz I would have had to set her straight. Uhh... What? Why should a vegan have to serve non-vegan options at their own dinner party? Edited September 8, 2014 by hellon 4
rester Posted September 8, 2014 Posted September 8, 2014 Uhh... What? Why should a vegan have to serve non-vegan options at their own dinner party? It's off-topic, but yeah, you don't go to a bar mitzvah and expect lobster and bacon, just as you don't expect steak at a vegan's dinner party. 2
hellon Posted September 8, 2014 Posted September 8, 2014 It's off-topic, but yeah, you don't go to a bar mitzvah and expect lobster and bacon, just as you don't expect steak at a vegan's dinner party. Haha, exactly! Sorry for the tangent.
Eggplant Posted September 8, 2014 Posted September 8, 2014 It is actually a pretty big deal if you're considering being together seriously long-term. I couldn't be with a person who ate junk food regularly. Couples share cooked meals, and I'm not cooking crap.
Author Darren2013 Posted September 8, 2014 Author Posted September 8, 2014 (edited) Ah...so lying and deception, then? Why do you think any woman would be more likely to tolerate you lying to and deceiving her, than the fact that you eat junk food? On the other side, would you consider reducing your junk food intake for your own peace of mind and also physical health? It just sounds like a bad habit, or even addiction, that is obviously causing you concern, anxiety, guilt, self-recriminations, etc. I think there's a difference between lying vs. not doing certain things in front of others if there's a chance it is going to bother them. It is called being considerate. Just like a smoker shouldn't smoke in front of their girlfriend if she does not smoke. How much he smokes when he is alone is his business but he should put the cigarettes away and polish up his breath before the next time he sees her. She doesn't have to know every detail about every meal I eat when she isn't around. She isn't my dietary parole officer that I have to report to at the end of each day to let her know that I ate junk food for lunch at my work. Edited September 8, 2014 by Darren2013
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