I stink apparently.

[ymbstocc]

Hi, I hope you don't mind the rambling post but I'm feeling rather ****ty and have no one else to talk this stuff through.

 

I was dating this woman for over a year. She was divorced and has a couple kids and only a couple years older than me and lives with her elderly mother which didn't bother me at all.

 

Anyways a week ago I picked her up at her place at a prearranged time to drive her to a meeting. I take her to her destination and lean over to give her a hug and kiss before she got out the car door. She physically pushed me away and told me I smell, which surprised me because I strive for impeccable hygiene wasn't wearing any odorous body spray or anything like that.

 

So I enquire further and to paraphrase she told me I have "Young man Smell" whatever that means I asked her if it was bothering her for awhile and she said yes and that she doesn't want my smell on her made a snide remark about how I shouldn't be offended by that and her cousin smells like it too and got out of the car and left.

 

Anyways after dropping her off and having my day ruined I continued on to my office completed my work day and afterwords bagged up the stuff she left in the car swung by her house. Put in black marker her name and the words "I hope your stuff doesn't smell like me" and tossed the bag on the front porch. Got a random text around midnight from her about how her meeting went crappy and she'd contact me in a couple days.

 

So Saturday morning rolls around and I get woken at 6:45am with a phone call about her wanting to drop by and get the stuff she left in the car which she's done in the past as an excuse to come over for sex. I told her I'm upset at her for the way she treated me and I dropped her stuff off at her house. She goes on this big rant about how I'm supposed to take care of the stuff that she leaves in my car and how nothing is there. (Turns out her mom tossed it) which was apparently my fault and she hung up on me.

 

So I offered to come over and dumpster dive to find her stuff which she never responded to. Didn't get a hold of her for another couple days only to find out that everything was recovered no problem but was to busy to talk, so I tried to get a hold of her during the week which she completely ignored texts and voice mail and got a returned phone call this evening.

 

For my trouble of answering the phone and wanting to talk things through she unloaded decided to tell me she doesn't approve of my job because I don't make enough money for her and I should quit right away to find something that makes three times what I make so that she can get the big $800,000 house she wants like her friends husband bought and she thinks she'll have to end up taking care of me if we ever move in together and that My feelings aren't valid because I'm a man and I'm supposed be strong and not say anything and keep quiet because she doesn't want to deal with my feelings and apparently for dropping the stuff off on her porch I'm unpredictable and I make her feel unsafe. Also apparently she was bothered because I phoned and asked her out while she was feeling ill last year and didn't sound concerned enough. She then went on to say she thinks we need to take a break and hung up.

 

I'm not just taking a break , I want to dump her, any suggestions on making a clean break?

[ConfusedHumanBeing]

Hi, I hope you don't mind the rambling post but I'm feeling rather ****ty and have no one else to talk this stuff through.

 

I was dating this woman for over a year. She was divorced and has a couple kids and only a couple years older than me and lives with her elderly mother which didn't bother me at all.

 

Anyways a week ago I picked her up at her place at a prearranged time to drive her to a meeting. I take her to her destination and lean over to give her a hug and kiss before she got out the car door. She physically pushed me away and told me I smell, which surprised me because I strive for impeccable hygiene wasn't wearing any odorous body spray or anything like that.

 

So I enquire further and to paraphrase she told me I have "Young man Smell" whatever that means I asked her if it was bothering her for awhile and she said yes and that she doesn't want my smell on her made a snide remark about how I shouldn't be offended by that and her cousin smells like it too and got out of the car and left.

 

Anyways after dropping her off and having my day ruined I continued on to my office completed my work day and afterwords bagged up the stuff she left in the car swung by her house. Put in black marker her name and the words "I hope your stuff doesn't smell like me" and tossed the bag on the front porch. Got a random text around midnight from her about how her meeting went crappy and she'd contact me in a couple days.

 

So Saturday morning rolls around and I get woken at 6:45am with a phone call about her wanting to drop by and get the stuff she left in the car which she's done in the past as an excuse to come over for sex. I told her I'm upset at her for the way she treated me and I dropped her stuff off at her house. She goes on this big rant about how I'm supposed to take care of the stuff that she leaves in my car and how nothing is there. (Turns out her mom tossed it) which was apparently my fault and she hung up on me.

 

So I offered to come over and dumpster dive to find her stuff which she never responded to. Didn't get a hold of her for another couple days only to find out that everything was recovered no problem but was to busy to talk, so I tried to get a hold of her during the week which she completely ignored texts and voice mail and got a returned phone call this evening.

 

For my trouble of answering the phone and wanting to talk things through she unloaded decided to tell me she doesn't approve of my job because I don't make enough money for her and I should quit right away to find something that makes three times what I make so that she can get the big $800,000 house she wants like her friends husband bought and she thinks she'll have to end up taking care of me if we ever move in together and that My feelings aren't valid because I'm a man and I'm supposed be strong and not say anything and keep quiet because she doesn't want to deal with my feelings and apparently for dropping the stuff off on her porch I'm unpredictable and I make her feel unsafe. Also apparently she was bothered because I phoned and asked her out while she was feeling ill last year and didn't sound concerned enough. She then went on to say she thinks we need to take a break and hung up.

 

I'm not just taking a break , I want to dump her, any suggestions on making a clean break?

 

Maybe leave a pile of dog crap on her door with a note saying "How does that smell?" and say you want to break up

 

In all seriousness, wow....there is probably something WAY deeper than what she is leading on here that has nothing to do with you. You small fine, you leaving the stuff on the door wasnt a big deal, and she should take SOME sort of responsibility towards how you are feeling. She seems unstable and REALLY out there. Granted, its hard to label someone on two paragraphs in a thread, but she doesnt sound incredibly stable. Probably a reason she is divorced.

 

It sounds like there is really no where to go with this. A clean break I guess I would call her and tell her you are not happy, you dont see it going anywhere, and you are done. I wouldnt put too much thought about it honestly, Be a gentleman and up front, but I wouldnt worry too much about it. Just get it done and go find someone who will treat you better than this. Maybe one who no sense of smell kidding of course.

[evanescentworld]

....

I'm not just taking a break , I want to dump her, any suggestions on making a clean break?

Yes.

Delete her number off your phone, block her incoming calls and texts, block her emails and change your phone number. I have just changed mine, because I went from one company provider to another, and agreed to a full number change, which led to no problems whatsoever, regarding existing contacts in my phone. I told and informed everyone, and now they all know I have a new number.

Block her on FB, and refuse to have anything further to do with her.

 

It couldn't be simpler.

 

Honestly, it's not difficult.

it's only as difficult as the hurdles you put in your own way are, to overcome.

In other words, if you see difficulties, they're self-imposed.

[Art_Critic]

I'm not just taking a break , I want to dump her, any suggestions on making a clean break?

 

I'm very surprised you haven't already made the break..you need to figure out why you would allow yourself to be treated in such a manner and believe that it was okay...

 

She sounds like a horrible person, telling you that you smell, blaming things on you, telling you that don't make enough and are not man enough to support her..

 

 

Please dump her and block her number

[ymbstocc]

I'm very surprised you haven't already made the break..you need to figure out why you would allow yourself to be treated in such a manner and believe that it was okay...

 

She sounds like a horrible person, telling you that you smell, blaming things on you, telling you that don't make enough and are not man enough to support her..

 

 

Please dump her and block her number

 

Well, for one I'm aghast really because I didn't expect someone I had actually felt enough to care about and think about a possible future would suddenly turn and launch into a tirade about how everything in my life sucks. I really felt speechless. Quite frankly I don't want to ever speak to her again but she left open the possibility that she's going to try and come back at some future date.

 

 

The other reason I posted is really my chest and head were hurting and typing it made me feel better.

 

 

Also my dating experience is rather limited, this was the first time I ever felt serious about anyone. For the most part before this I've been independent and haven't done any real dating before.

 

 

Anyways I've deleted her number and boxed up the remaining crap she left at my place.

[mightycpa]

Anyways I've deleted her number and boxed up the remaining crap she left at my place.

 

Atta pepper!

[mtnbiker3000]

You must be Neo in order to dodge that many bullets!!