born Posted September 6, 2014 Posted September 6, 2014 Ldr ex came this summer to her hometown. We did have sex and all but i felt i was so used for sex that i exploded and took back a present i had bought her and was just saying how bad she was at me. I just fed up being the good guy and loving her while she was banging other dudes and snapchatting me guys etc . After a week of what happened we agreed to meet up. At first i didn't want to but she insisted and was saying things like ... that she values me as a human being that she was mean on purpose for me to move on... that she is disgusted by her ugly behavior... that she wants to have me back but she can't have me like she had me (can't understand what that means) . Anyway we met up and she said that she was sorry and was asking how i was and i told her that my life was hell the last 10 months. It was very weird meet up . I went for a kiss but she refused then in the end we kissed and said goodnight. I asked her why would you want us to be friends (fwb)?Because if you don't find someone better you can come back to me? And she said in someway yes.... 2 days later i ask her if we can hang out cause she told me that we would if she could and although she saw the message she left it un answered. So i text 2 hours later aren't you going to answer me? She said about what? about today i said and she told me that she had forgot (year right) so i went nuts. Then the next day she decided to end it and i was in so much pain after 10 months of constant rejection and i was sitting there getting rejected again after being humiliated so many times i exploded and said ****ing bitch and i spit on the ground in front of her. The she simply unfriended me on facebook but kept skype and viber. So i deleted everything. Why would she say all those things?Why would she say she is sorry and that wants to hung out with me
Zahara Posted September 6, 2014 Posted September 6, 2014 (edited) I don't know how to advise you anymore. If you don't want to find peace and emotional freedom in your life but instead CHOOSE to be disrespected, used, manipulated and inflict pain on yourself, no amount of advice, page after page after page is going to help you. I will say that women like her choose to revisit men like you because you will always be a dependable source of attention when they need it. And when you're weak, lacking self-respect, they know that no matter what they do, you'll tolerate and always be available to them. If you want to hear someone says she loves you that is why she wanted to meet, you won't get that because she doesn't love you. I hope you find your way, born. It's a shame that one person can have this much control over you and your life. And for this one person you've emasculated and beaten yourself to a pulp. Edited September 6, 2014 by Zahara 2
Author born Posted September 6, 2014 Author Posted September 6, 2014 well okay the thing that i got rejected by some girls this year cause of my depression doesnt help either for me to move on. Its just that it is so hard to find a girl i like and she likes me too and get into a relationship as the only one i had so far is too dificult . So while it sucks to be alone sometimes it seams easier to fix something old than start something new. Ive returned home from vacation about a week ago and i saw from her friend that she is still here even though i had blocked her on fb. That set me back . I just cant get over this . Im doing nc dont even talk about it to my friends or family anymore. Its like that for 10-15 days im doing great and then im making those thoughts . Its just questions that hunt me and need answers. Why would she want to meet up with me just to say sorry . She even said that what im going through for her fashinates her but also scares her. Is she damaged from her parents abuse?
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