Lostdreams Posted September 4, 2014 Posted September 4, 2014 (edited) Hi Guys, Broken up since 10 weeks - haven't made love in 14 weeks and I'm really finding this very tough. Yes I have opportunities ..... actually more than I even expected..... but it doesn't feel right. 1. A really nice guy, also separated with two kids, obviously looking for a deeper relationship - excitement factor zero can't even go there and wouldn't want to hurt him anyway 2. A male friend who suddenly wanted to become FWB after my break up - I mean WTH it's not even possible to imagine it - so now he's gone all short with me since I explained it's not going to happen 3. The office serial f*cker - I mean seriously ..... would I ever stoop so low ... not so much Would like to consider even a ONS ...... but then I know wouldn't be comfortable with that either. Yes we can all do something nice for ourselves but it's just not the same. How are you coping ? What's your approach ? Edited September 4, 2014 by Lostdreams
Reels Posted September 5, 2014 Posted September 5, 2014 Coping? Just having stronger amount of exemption from the human relations. Once you have such approach, you will probably remain happy even after break up. I agree that it takes a lot of time.
W101 Posted September 6, 2014 Posted September 6, 2014 "making love" isn't the be all and end all, without someone who matters it's not "making love" at all, personally, my approach has always been to go with how I feel, if I met someone who I didn't have to question myself about, I'll happily give anything a try, so long as it felt right for me, if not, well... nobody loved e better than my right hand anyway.
OwMyEyeball Posted September 6, 2014 Posted September 6, 2014 75mg Venlafaxine each morning Buh bye sex drive!
hedyo Posted September 6, 2014 Posted September 6, 2014 My sex drive is pretty non-existent since the BU. The only slight motivation I have for wanting to sleep with someone is that I feel kind of stupid being celibate when my ex is probably having lots of sex. I have to remind myself that it's not a competition and that I need to stay true to what's right for me. 1
Allumere Posted September 6, 2014 Posted September 6, 2014 Seriously? Talk to me when it has been a year...or 5 years. Stock up on batteries. 1
Author Lostdreams Posted September 6, 2014 Author Posted September 6, 2014 Thanks for your answers Guys and Ladies I guess what I'm meaning is that I really miss the connection with that special person. Yes I do mean making love and not just .....erm .....human relations as Reels puts it. It was a feel good factor which is now missing in my life..... when you're connected and in a relationship...... that's what I meant. I am realizing this loss and it's painful. Finding such a level of intimacy with somebody else is very daunting and feels downright impossible for the time being I hope I managed to explain it a bit better - for me its a desert ... 1 year, 5 years ............ who knows
Itspointless Posted September 6, 2014 Posted September 6, 2014 I guess what I'm meaning is that I really miss the connection with that special person. In my book it is a real luxury to have the possibility to share these kind of things with such a person. (A luxury I wish for anyone).
Allumere Posted September 6, 2014 Posted September 6, 2014 Thanks for your answers Guys and Ladies I guess what I'm meaning is that I really miss the connection with that special person. Yes I do mean making love and not just .....erm .....human relations as Reels puts it. It was a feel good factor which is now missing in my life..... when you're connected and in a relationship...... that's what I meant. I am realizing this loss and it's painful. Finding such a level of intimacy with somebody else is very daunting and feels downright impossible for the time being I hope I managed to explain it a bit better - for me its a desert ... 1 year, 5 years ............ who knows Unfortunately it is just part of the failed relationship fallout. Even if sex wasn't involved the intimacy for the closeness, openess in dialog, physical presence is certainly something to mourn over. I am a very physical person and physical contact is like breathing for me so I get ya....but as I said, you will manage like we all do. It just takes time (I know, most annoying thing to say ever), 2
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