Vandel Posted September 2, 2014 Posted September 2, 2014 (edited) Hi, first of all, English is my third language, so sorry for any spelling errors etc. So here is the situation - i am a 24 year old guy and i am basically an internet entrepreneur working from home. I also finished university few months ago so I have a lot of freedom and free time now. I first met this girl 2 years ago, through a friend. I was like 22 years old and she was 17. I was really astonished how intelligent she was even back then (she attended the most elite grammar school in our neighbourhood), but she was simply young and i could "feel" the age gap. So i havent made any move neither did she. We have seen each other very often back then, but then we did not see each other for maybe like 15-18 month or so. She messaged me 4 weeks ago asking how its going etc. and that she would like to see me. We agreed to see each other the next day but i flaked on her. 2 weeks ago i was with my friend and we wanted to meet some girls (we were bored ) i messaged her and we met right away.... we talked a lot and basically we started to see each other every single day. She is 19 (me 24) now and i can tell you that she is way more mature than she was the last time i met her. I do not want to overemphasise on her IQ but she won some national contests in various school subjects etc. so she is super bright hehe BUT i am still afraid over the age gap. With that comes maybe the biggest problem - she is now going to the university and she will be coming home maybe every 2-4 weeks for the weekend through her semester. The second problem - she will be working on some crucial tasks for me in the next 2-3 weeks (till she is still at home), basically i will employ her. I do this purely because of her talent, skill etc. I am very attracted to her, because we have a lot in common and simply put - i like to be around her. I havent made any bold move yet, but there was some non sexual touching, some really long looking into each other eyes (my gut was telling me that i should kiss her during those moments) etc. and the thing that she calls me every single day to go out with her. Is it worth taking the risk and making the move? If yes, should i simply try to kiss her? Basically i am afraid of the age gap, that she will be in university and that maybe i am misinterpreting the whole thing and that she is not interested in me? Edited September 2, 2014 by Vandel
HappyLove Posted September 2, 2014 Posted September 2, 2014 When she's finished her project working for you ask her out on a proper date. Don't just kiss her. Make it a romantic date and THEN kiss her. 1
Author Vandel Posted September 2, 2014 Author Posted September 2, 2014 The problem is that the moment she will be finished with my project she will go away because of the university. So i wont be able to kiss her.
Gloria25 Posted September 2, 2014 Posted September 2, 2014 I don't see an "age gap" here... but if you're looking to date someone seriously, a 19 yr old isn't gonna be the same person at mid 20's, late 20's, and so on... Gotta love the 'he/she is more mature than others his/her age' argument people make when wanting to date someone younger than them :roll eyes: Anywho, the issue for me is that she works for you. If ever your personal or professional relationship sours you gotta be careful that if you show interest in her, cuz she may file an EEO/discrimination complaint against you. People are funny you know. But if you still wanna risk getting involved with someone who works for you, then I say you need to set the stage for a kiss to happen and to really confirm where you stand with her. Maybe you can say something like 'We've known each other for a while, and I'd like to take you on a "date" sometime...would you be interested in us taking that step?' and see what she does/says. Then if you two end up on a date, then if a kiss happens, it wouldn't be something you gotta guess whether or not you have the right to do/with to her.
Author Vandel Posted September 2, 2014 Author Posted September 2, 2014 Gloria - yes, i know that every person will tell you, that this one is else, he/she is more mature. Thats why i havent made any move yet and at the beginning i was strictly against it, although this barrier is getting lower each time i meet her. I always laugh at the guys who date considerably younger girls and it would be funny if i would become one of them myself . I am still thinking about it if 19 and 24 is a big age gap or its not. Its not like she is my full time employee, it will be a short 2-3 week thing and she will be working from her home. I think thats important, it would be a something else if she would be sitting next to me in an office... that would be "dangerous" but maybe i am downplaying it. But i like the idea with the date. I think i will do it this way when i will decide that i want to do it.
preraph Posted September 2, 2014 Posted September 2, 2014 It's not a big age gap, but why pursue this when you know she'll be gone soon?
Author Vandel Posted September 2, 2014 Author Posted September 2, 2014 Thats a valid point. Well i dont know, its not like she will be away 365 days of the year. She will come home once/twice a month and the semester lasts for 3 months (x2 per year). The thing is that we have really a lot in common. I havent met any girl that would be close to her in that regard. And i dated a girl my own age few months ago so i am not that creepy guy that cant get a girl his own age . But i havent met any girl my own age + that we would be so "compatible" like her...
newmoon Posted September 2, 2014 Posted September 2, 2014 just do it. be a man and kiss the girl. nothing bad will happen. and if she rejects your advances it won't matter because she is leaving.
Assasda Posted September 2, 2014 Posted September 2, 2014 OP you sound super insecure. And almost girl-like in your post. Why did you "flake" on her?
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