Atticus9292012 Posted September 1, 2014 Posted September 1, 2014 I met this guy in person Friday night I met on okcupid. We hadn't spent much time talking before the meeting, which is not my standard procedure....so I met him at a busy bar and parked at a parking lot that has heavy foot traffic. First semi red flag, he kept insisting on picking me up at my house. I never ever do that with someone from the internet which is why I insisted we meet at the bar and made sure to park at a busy parking lot. It went really well and he gave me a little kiss good night. I thought maybe I overreacted in the moment...Well, he was very persistent about seeing me again the next day. I suggested another drink or a meal. He wanted to come over. My gut again kept telling me this was too much too soon. I agreed initially and then backed out. I'm kind of sick so I embellished it a little. He took that well. He has been blowing me up about seeing me again, but coming to my house. Everything I suggest not at my house he turns down. I explained I'm not comfortable with him coming over and only agreed initially Saturday, but wasn't okay with it. He then tells me how he's tight on funds and so doesn't want to go out. It just really didn't sit well with me so I told him to get lost. Am I being paranoid?
sid3 Posted September 1, 2014 Posted September 1, 2014 No, I don't think so. He sounds super creepy. 1
bluesgirl Posted September 1, 2014 Posted September 1, 2014 No you can never be too sure! I wouldn't let a guy come over until we are familiar with each other and have had a least a 4-5 dates! You can never be too cautious, so applaud yourself for trusting your gut instinct! 1
sid3 Posted September 1, 2014 Posted September 1, 2014 No you can never be too sure! I wouldn't let a guy come over until we are familiar with each other and have had a least a 4-5 dates! You can never be too cautious, so applaud yourself for trusting your gut instinct! Exactly. And the low on funds line was equally as lame. If he can't afford a cup of coffee in a public setting, dating shouldn't be his priority. Sounds like his game is trying to get at a lady at her place, that or he's looking for a souvenir, the kind he can sniff.
TheyCallMeOx Posted September 1, 2014 Posted September 1, 2014 I don't think you're being paranoid. When you're in the dating scene, you're expected to actually date people. Dating usually requires some kind of funds. If you're tight on funds, you can have a very basic picnic at a park. 10 dollars can land you a picnic date, and you may not even need the 10 bucks. If your funds are so tight to the extent that you can't spend 10 dollars on a picnic date, then you are in no position to start dating. If you're in a relationship and things are going great, it's okay to spend some time in each other's places but if you haven't gotten to that level in the relationship, you gotta be able to do more things than watch movies on Netflix and fondle each other midway into the movie. 1
Author Atticus9292012 Posted September 1, 2014 Author Posted September 1, 2014 I suggested coffee and he turned that down. That is when I said you need to focus on someone else and lose my number. I also told him I move slow so no physical for awhile. Hanging out and netflixing is something you do once you're comfortable with someone/possibility of sex. It just seemed odd and totality too much too soon.
Justletgo Posted September 1, 2014 Posted September 1, 2014 If he turns all other offers down he is definitely not caring about wanting to 'really' meet you in neutral places. Which means he just wants to do what he wants and fulfill his needs. Creepy, because I think it must have worked on some poor woman for him to still be behaving like this.
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