purplesoccer34 Posted September 1, 2014 Posted September 1, 2014 (edited) One of my friends has been liking me for nearly 4 years. He has been trying so hard to go out with me. He asked me out several times, and even told me that he thinks he's in love with me. He told my best friend that he'd do anything for me, and all my friends tell me he's obsessed with me. I don't know about obsessed, but I know that he really likes me. However, I don't like him as any more than a friend, and I would never go out with him. I'm also very good friends with his best friend. I'm close to both of these guys, but in some ways, I feel closer to his best friend because we tell each other nearly everything. We always only saw each other as friends, but I can't help but think that maybe I'm starting to develop slight feelings for him. I feel terrible about this because the guy who likes me is a super nice guy and he's done so much for me over the years. He such a great person and I just don't want to hurt him. I'm very close to both of these guys. However, I think my feelings for the guy's best friend get stronger every time I see him. Should I tell him or would that just be a terrible idea? I would feel like a terrible person going for his friend instead of him, knowing that he's been liking me for so long. Is it best that I just let this go completely and keep my feelings to myself? Edited September 1, 2014 by purplesoccer34
mightycpa Posted September 1, 2014 Posted September 1, 2014 Tell Mr. BFF. Your admirer will have to deal with your disinterest at some point in his life.
Assasda Posted September 1, 2014 Posted September 1, 2014 Yeah, Go out with his friend if you like him. The other guy did the dreaded "I will verbalize my feelings to you" and got shot down. hahahaha And he has you up on the pedestal. So you should be unattracted to him. I dont know if there is anyway to let the obsessive admirer down easy
Author purplesoccer34 Posted September 1, 2014 Author Posted September 1, 2014 Yeah you're right. Now I'm seriously thinking that telling his best friend will be the only way this guy will get over me. I've told him very firmly many, many times I don't like him and that this whole thing needs to stop. For whatever reason, his admiration is excessive and is going out of bounds, so of course, he never gave up no matter what I said. He says he thinks that we're still meant to be together forever. When I tell his best friend that I like him, this guy is sure to hate me for it, but I'm thinking that's a lot better than him pursuing me every single day.
Standard-Fare Posted September 1, 2014 Posted September 1, 2014 You're going to crush your admirer by going after any guy that's not him. But that's not necessarily your problem. And yes, it's going to crush him even more for you to go after his best friend. That will be his worst nightmare come true. I think before you proceed, you should spend more time alone with the best friend and make sure you actually are interested in him. (You said you "maybe" could be developing "slight feelings.") It isn't worth causing the pain and complications unless you actually see something real there. But if you do genuinely like him, you should go for it, while trying to be as delicate as possible with the admirer's feelings.
MoreCoffee Posted September 1, 2014 Posted September 1, 2014 Ouch. How intense is your "like," compared to your respect for the unrequited admirer?
Recommended Posts