Ninjainpajamas Posted September 1, 2014 Posted September 1, 2014 You multi-date yourself up to 3 or 4 men at a time from what I've read...why would you be disappointed in this guys behavior just for sending a message to a woman who happened to be your friend on a dating site? 4
Zapbasket Posted September 1, 2014 Posted September 1, 2014 Actually there will never be that problem between my friend and I. I only date black men and she only date white men. Perfect! Then you can be each others' spies if the truthfulness of one of the members hitting on one of you is in question
Author Gaeta Posted September 1, 2014 Author Posted September 1, 2014 You multi-date yourself up to 3 or 4 men at a time from what I've read...why would you be disappointed in this guys behavior just for sending a message to a woman who happened to be your friend on a dating site? Yes I multi date and naturally they eliminate themselves along the way. This time I had 4 prospects. This one here is the only one that made it to a 3rd date, the others eliminated themselves after 1-2 dates. If I like a man enough to see him + 3 dates I don't go online make new contact after a 3rd date. In this case here I am the one who made contact with him. Maybe I wasn't totally his type but cute enough to get on a couple of dates. With my friend (who's a tall blond, I am a short brunette) he contacted her, which means to me that she is more his type than I am.
Author Gaeta Posted September 1, 2014 Author Posted September 1, 2014 Perfect! Then you can be each others' spies if the truthfulness of one of the members hitting on one of you is in question That's actually how her and I met years ago lol. She messaged me on a dating site to warn me about someone. We've been best friends ever since. She is my longest relationship out of a dating site lol. 1
HappyLove Posted September 1, 2014 Posted September 1, 2014 Yes I multi date and naturally they eliminate themselves along the way. This time I had 4 prospects. This one here is the only one that made it to a 3rd date, the others eliminated themselves after 1-2 dates. If I like a man enough to see him + 3 dates I don't go online make new contact after a 3rd date. In this case here I am the one who made contact with him. Maybe I wasn't totally his type but cute enough to get on a couple of dates. With my friend (who's a tall blond, I am a short brunette) he contacted her, which means to me that she is more his type than I am. He's probably messaging hundreds of women. That's just how it is with OLDing. It doesn't mean she's more his type.
Andy_K Posted September 1, 2014 Posted September 1, 2014 Personally, if I've had at least one date with a girl I see genuine potential with, and she's agreed to a second, I'm not going to be contacting anyone new online. I might reply to someone who messages me first or continue any existing conversation, but I'm not going to go out of my way to find other prospects - better to spend my energy getting to know the one I've got. But then again, I'm 99% sure I would have taken things further than a peck on the lips after three dates too...
FitChick Posted September 1, 2014 Posted September 1, 2014 I am the one who made contact with him. Maybe I wasn't totally his type but cute enough to get on a couple of dates. Women, listen and learn. This is why I never message the guy first. 3
BluEyeL Posted September 1, 2014 Posted September 1, 2014 Women, listen and learn. This is why I never message the guy first. Second that.
preraph Posted September 1, 2014 Posted September 1, 2014 It shouldn't bother you right now, but if he should start suggesting you be exclusive anytime soon, you should hit him between the eyes with the factoid.
ja123 Posted September 2, 2014 Posted September 2, 2014 Of course, you'd feel awkward that he messaged your friend. I don't know if you should say anything right now, though. Has a date 4 already been planned? Who initiated dates 1, 2, and 3 (and possibly 4)?
Gloria25 Posted September 2, 2014 Posted September 2, 2014 Nah, I say don't tell him.... If she didn't and does not intend to respond to him, no point in rattling the cages... Next time get ugly friends...that way you don't have to worry about guys being attracted to them...lol. I feel ya, Gaeta, OLD sucks big time. 1
TayTay415 Posted September 2, 2014 Posted September 2, 2014 But should that bother me at this point? I understand why it does. You like him, you want him to like you enough too such that he's not still searching for others. But, until you're exclusive, he's wise to keep his options open. You should do the same. Also, don't say anything to him. And don't have your friend say anything either. 1
chimpanA-2-chimpanZ Posted September 2, 2014 Posted September 2, 2014 Don't say anything to him. You aren't exclusive yet and it would end awkwardly. It's not like he should apologize for being interested in other women. When I was single, I kept my profile up and sent messages even after multiple dates with one person; it was only after we had the relationship conversation that I took things down. However, my male friends were usually very quick to delete their profiles when they found someone they liked. If this guy is still waffling around after more than three dates it's unlikely that he's genuinely interested. 1
Author Gaeta Posted September 2, 2014 Author Posted September 2, 2014 Thanks guys. My gut feeling tells me he's not ready for something serious even though he says so. Very common for men just arriving online. He's just 1 year out of a 20 year marriage. It's his first time online and he even told me how he's overwhelmed with messages of all kinds of women, some just wanting fun etc. I think he needs to play the field before setting. All this attention is boosting his male ego. I need to find someone like me, someone who's been on there long enough he can't wait to get off of it.
Recommended Posts