jen_r Posted August 31, 2014 Posted August 31, 2014 Another relationship gone to $h!t. I swear to god I'm a glutton for punishment. Why don't you see red flags as they're happening? Or do we see them and ignore them? My bf logged onto FB on my phone, stupid mistake on his part, and left it on there. I read through some messages and found out he cheated on me while we were in a fight (and sent VERY inappropriate texts the weekend before the fight) and then confessed to having sex with someone when we were first dating. The sex thing in the beginning doesn't bother me nearly as much because we barely knew each other at that point. But he lied STRAIGHT to my face when I asked what happened between him and this girl during our fight. The lying - makes me literally sick to my stomach. How do you look someone in the eye who is BEGGING for you to tell them the truth and lie to them. To me that means you really don't love me or value me at all. He says he sorry, obviously...he got caught. Regrets it, yaddy yaddy yadda. They only kissed - yeah right. Anyways now I'm sitting in my apartment with nothing to do and I don't know how I'm going to cut off contact with him. He is leaving for tour in 18 days and he'll be gone for almost 3 months - so I suppose that is perfect for me....but until then....I am so weak.
mammasita Posted August 31, 2014 Posted August 31, 2014 Well, you're not stupid.......and if you are, we're all certainly guilty of being complete idiots in some way at some point in any relationship. Look, you were/are obviously in love with this guy who for all intents and purposes is a liar and a cheat. Be happy that you know this now. Lesson learned, bullet dodged.
Author jen_r Posted August 31, 2014 Author Posted August 31, 2014 Well, you're not stupid.......and if you are, we're all certainly guilty of being complete idiots in some way at some point in any relationship. Look, you were/are obviously in love with this guy who for all intents and purposes is a liar and a cheat. Be happy that you know this now. Lesson learned, bullet dodged. I try to tell myself this - that at least I found out now, even though on some level I already knew he wasn't trustworthy. I think my problem is that I keep going back to find out why. Why would they do this to me? Cause for the life of me, I don't understand cheating. I think you see them and ignore them. And this is why you ignore them. ....good point :-/
D-Lish Posted September 1, 2014 Posted September 1, 2014 Another relationship gone to $h!t. I swear to god I'm a glutton for punishment. Why don't you see red flags as they're happening? Or do we see them and ignore them? On the flip side, there is something about you that draws guys like this to you. They are likely sensing a certain vulnerability or weakness that you project. If you allow yourself to be open to this type of treatment, you remain a perfect partner for guys like this one. 1
Author jen_r Posted September 1, 2014 Author Posted September 1, 2014 On the flip side, there is something about you that draws guys like this to you. They are likely sensing a certain vulnerability or weakness that you project. If you allow yourself to be open to this type of treatment, you remain a perfect partner for guys like this one. I doubt it. He's the first guy to ever cheat on me. I definitely do not give off a vibe that I can be walked all over. I basically told him to F off and that were done and I dont want to be a part of a relationship like that. Its just now that im alone in my own head - I start to question everything. I don't want to fix things, but I keep wondering how I can just be done with him for good...I hate change. And I obviously love him...
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