LifeandPerseverance Posted August 30, 2014 Posted August 30, 2014 When you make plans to hang out with a guy (which he perpetuates), just casually to a casual event, and he texts you and says, "Okay, so I'm thinking we should go at 4, and then we can go for a couple hours, but I do have something I have to do just after 6 o'clock." Isn't that a guy's way of routing his escape plan, so he doesn't have to spend an afternoon with you? Or am I just being paranoid? From a female perspective that's how I read that text. Am I wrong? Doesn't that text basically say in bold letters "I'm not interested"?
Keenly Posted August 30, 2014 Posted August 30, 2014 That does not mean anything one way or the other
Andy_K Posted August 30, 2014 Posted August 30, 2014 No, he's interested enough. He just has another date lined up after 6 and wants to avoid a clash, that's all. 2
sdrawkcaB ssA Posted August 30, 2014 Posted August 30, 2014 some guys are busy... others are not. if anything he should give a proper explanation. txting is way to simplified, so put him on the spot and ask him face to face what made his life too busy to honor the time for a date.
me85 Posted August 30, 2014 Posted August 30, 2014 Not to worry. If he wasn't interested he would just blow the whole thing off with you all together. Why waste his time?? Relax. Maybe he'll tell you what his plans are after 6. Maybe he won't. Either way, you get to spend time with him so just enjoy that time together as it comes. 1
Poppygoodwill Posted August 30, 2014 Posted August 30, 2014 I agree. if he wasn't interested, he wouldn't make a date in the first place. But I know what you mean: it's a bit off-putting to be told before you even meet, that there's a time limit on the date. It seems to signal a lack of willingness to spend time together. But on the other hand, think of it this way: he's go a busy day and he's finding a way to squeeze you in becuase you are that important to him! It's only the pattern over time that will tell you if there's a bigger issue at stake. For this date, go along, be fabulous, show him a good time and at 6 pm wave him off with a smile, and make sure he knows you're going to meet your friends and have a great time yourself. 1
irresolute Posted August 30, 2014 Posted August 30, 2014 When you make plans to hang out with a guy (which he perpetuates), just casually to a casual event, and he texts you and says, "Okay, so I'm thinking we should go at 4, and then we can go for a couple hours, but I do have something I have to do just after 6 o'clock." Isn't that a guy's way of routing his escape plan, so he doesn't have to spend an afternoon with you? Or am I just being paranoid? From a female perspective that's how I read that text. Am I wrong? Doesn't that text basically say in bold letters "I'm not interested"? Totally right. If this girl were his dreamgirl, he would never EVER make this kind of silly excuse. If he's crazy about someone nothing is more important than to hang out with them. you're right, follow your guts 4
Popsicle Posted August 30, 2014 Posted August 30, 2014 You need to let the guy ask you out. Then things like this don't happen.
MissBee Posted August 30, 2014 Posted August 30, 2014 When you make plans to hang out with a guy (which he perpetuates), just casually to a casual event, and he texts you and says, "Okay, so I'm thinking we should go at 4, and then we can go for a couple hours, but I do have something I have to do just after 6 o'clock." Isn't that a guy's way of routing his escape plan, so he doesn't have to spend an afternoon with you? Or am I just being paranoid? From a female perspective that's how I read that text. Am I wrong? Doesn't that text basically say in bold letters "I'm not interested"? I think it would be a lot easier for the person to just decline going and say they can't because they have to go somewhere else if they weren't interested, rather than go but then leave after 2 hours. It could mean he's going to be polite and then trying to escape OR he really has another thing to do at 6 but likes you enough to still go with you even though he can't stay for the whole time. I wouldn't automatically assume the negative just yet. I'd just take it as a positive that he's at least showing up and then just go from there and pay attention to whether or not he ever asks you out or how things are when you go out etc.
R3d Posted August 30, 2014 Posted August 30, 2014 But I know what you mean: it's a bit off-putting to be told before you even meet, that there's a time limit on the date. It seems to signal a lack of willingness to spend time together. What if you're a teenage guy like myself and your mom says that you're not allowed to be out for more than 2 hours at a time or so (except for certain circumstances)?
Author LifeandPerseverance Posted August 30, 2014 Author Posted August 30, 2014 OP here. Just thought I'd update and say a few things. First off: he doesn't live here. He lives about 50 miles away. However, his parents lives up here (and he's up here at least a couple weekends a month with them). And I know him through this--he was my very, very young childhood neighbor. So we got back from hanging out a couple hours ago. He told me shortly after he got here what his "6 o'clock" was--his brother, who moved further away, was in town, and they were playing music with their two old band buddies (they use to all have a band together.). We hung out for a couple hours, went to our event, etc. He insisted on paying for my ticket. Talked a lot, just about life stuff. We were in the middle of this really great philosophical conversation when we got back to my place and he had to leave. He hugged me when he left, and left at 6:20. He's like, "we should hang out again." He's 24, I'm 23. I'm not sure if I bored the heck out out him or not. But I did learn we both run, like Thai food, and scary movies.
smackie9 Posted August 31, 2014 Posted August 31, 2014 He went past his 6 o'clock deadline to be with you, things are looking pretty good....
turt Posted August 31, 2014 Posted August 31, 2014 Seriously, do you not want to meet him at all? He doesn't have a whole day for you so he doesn't like you? So what exactly does one have to do to show interest? 1
frankvega Posted August 31, 2014 Posted August 31, 2014 When you make plans to hang out with a guy (which he perpetuates), just casually to a casual event, and he texts you and says, "Okay, so I'm thinking we should go at 4, and then we can go for a couple hours, but I do have something I have to do just after 6 o'clock." Isn't that a guy's way of routing his escape plan, so he doesn't have to spend an afternoon with you? Or am I just being paranoid? From a female perspective that's how I read that text. Am I wrong? Doesn't that text basically say in bold letters "I'm not interested"? You are important enough for him to even show up knowing he has very little time for the other engagement. So yes he is somewhat intersted, But he is also has something lined up elsewhere. Trust me if a is very interested he would drop anything and risk anything to spend the whole night with you.
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