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Where did you meet your SO past age 35? Recommendations?

Veruca

By Veruca
in General Relationship Discussion

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Veruca New Member

Veruca

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Aside from on-line dating and work, where did you meet your significant other (boy/girlfriend, husband/wife) past age 35?

 

Also, are NMNK and divorced with kids compatible and viable for relationships leading to marriage? If so, what are the parameters? If not, then which demographic? I've heard so many differing opinions.

 

My friends and I are in a unique but apparently rapidly-growing niche of NMNK, past age 35, debt-free, educated, home owners, careers, "no baggage" (as some men have eloquently deemed us), active, in shape, attractive, etc.

 

Recommendations on target age groups and demographics and where to meet the most compatible matches for us would be greatly appreciated!

d0nnivain Established Member

d0nnivain

Posted
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I met my husband in a bar . . . well really it was a business networking event. We were both there trying to drum up business for ourselves. I was 39; he was 34. We were both NMNK but that is pretty rare after 30.

 

Other places I met guys while I was single include MeetUp groups; while working on/for charities; OLD; volunteering for a political campaign; at my high school's homecoming football game; at a wine tasting; through introductions from friends. A dear friend in the same boat met men though activities: scuba diving trips; riding her motorcycle and swimming.

 

I had no luck at most singles events but enjoyed one called Leashes & Lovers because I got to bring my dog. It had some potential & may have worked if I'd gone more than once. I was planning to try one where they matched you up to play golf.

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preraph Established Member

preraph

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Whether you're compatible with divorced men with kids is really up to you. My guess is if you don't have kids and/or don't want them, there's no reason you'd want someone else's around either. I know I wouldn't. But if you don't mind a bunch of extra work and consider having kids around a joy, then certainly not a dealbreaker.

 

I love the Leashes and Lovers idea, Donnivain. I'm over the hill for it now weightwise, but last time I was halfway fit, I spent a lot of time at the dog park, but what I found there was younger guys halfway intrigued with me and guys my age there mostly to stare at girls in their 20s. It was ironic. I never saw an older guy there I was attracted to anyway.

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d0nnivain Established Member

d0nnivain

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preraph

 

Leashes & Lovers was an organized thing in NYC. I went on their website to post the link but it looks defunct. I went to one of their happy hours which wasn't the best idea because my Dalmatian wasn't thrilled with all of the little dogs. I was too busy keeping him under control to be very social & I probably looked like a bad dog mom. They had other hikes & Stuff that probably would have been better; by then I had met DH.

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blueskyday Established Member

blueskyday

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I met my guy at a bar! Swore that would never happen, but some friends went to a meetup group that was there and I tagged along. Hadn't been in a bar in a few years. Never liked them much.

 

Turns out the guy I met was also tagging along. We hit it off by wondering together if the meetup group were a bunch of weirdos. (They weren't!)

 

Before him, I met lots of men at bookstores, restaurants picking up to go orders on weekend nights and during busy lunches. Also met guys at the grocery store and on local hike bike trails. On the trails I would do a few stretches. Amazing how many guys stopped to comment on how limber I was. Ha! Funny.

 

I also often got approached while walking my big furry dog!

 

So, everywhere is a possibility. If you have kids, hang out where the single parents take their kids, like pizza places, playgrounds, McDonald's!

 

Good luck! Just be friendly, smile, and they will approach!

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preraph Established Member

preraph

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Sounds fun. I have one dog I can't really trust with people or dogs yet. I did take her to the dog park once early on and she just hid under my legs, but she has bad mood swings and I'm beginning to think it could be epilepsy or something neurological at this point because I've had troubled scared dogs before and this one baffles me. She has had nightmare looking things that could have been a seizure. The behavior afterward fits the description, but it just looks like a bad dream. And read about it and it's true dogs usually seize at night. Costs a fortune to properly assess them and they will only treat if it's really bad anyway, so probably just have to learn to cope with it. Other dogs will attack dogs when their energy is off from a seizure, too, which would explain why her and my mild old dog who never had a run in with the last one have had some fights.

 

I love my dogs and it pains me when I can't cure one.

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Veruca New Member

Veruca

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I met my guy at a bar! Swore that would never happen, but some friends went to a meetup group that was there and I tagged along. Hadn't been in a bar in a few years. Never liked them much.

 

Turns out the guy I met was also tagging along. We hit it off by wondering together if the meetup group were a bunch of weirdos. (They weren't!)

 

Before him, I met lots of men at bookstores, restaurants picking up to go orders on weekend nights and during busy lunches. Also met guys at the grocery store and on local hike bike trails. On the trails I would do a few stretches. Amazing how many guys stopped to comment on how limber I was. Ha! Funny.

 

I also often got approached while walking my big furry dog!

 

So, everywhere is a possibility. If you have kids, hang out where the single parents take their kids, like pizza places, playgrounds, McDonald's!

 

Good luck! Just be friendly, smile, and they will approach!

 

Blueskyday,

 

The men you met, did they ask for your number or ask you out after meeting them on your errands?

 

I've had guys compliment me, make me laugh, chat with me, etc. but I can't tell if they're flirting or just being friendly, LOL ?

StanMusial Established Member

StanMusial

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I was introduced to my fiance by the lady that cuts my hair. I was 37 at the time. My advice would be to drop hints that you are looking. When the lady found out I was single she mentioned several girls that were looking for someone LOL. She introduced me to a girl that worked in that same building and the rest is history.

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mrs rubble Established Member

mrs rubble

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I met my fiance at a nudist club.;)

Both of us were clothes free.

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Veruca New Member

Veruca

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These are great stories! Thank you for the tips!

MidwestUSA Established Member

MidwestUSA

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I was 50 when I found my husband on Facebook. I had gone to school with his older brother. We grew up a mile and a half from each other, but hadn't met back then due to our age difference. I would have looked funny taking an eighth grader to senior prom. :laugh:

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clia Established Member

clia

Posted
Posted

We met at a wine tasting event through a Meetup group.

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blueskyday Established Member

blueskyday

Posted
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Blueskyday,

 

The men you met, did they ask for your number or ask you out after meeting them on your errands?

 

I've had guys compliment me, make me laugh, chat with me, etc. but I can't tell if they're flirting or just being friendly, LOL ?

 

They generally asked for my number. For a few of them, I dropped some major and blatant hints, as in, "oh gee, I have to get going but I've had so much fun talking to you. Wish we could continue this conversation later."

 

That usually worked. Number requested.

 

The guy I met at the bar/ meetup group didn't ask for my number, but he went to the next month's worth of events looking for me. I had forgotten that I told him I would go to more of the events .

 

When I showed up a month later at one, he was leaving, apparently writing me off. (Found that out after we had been dating a while.) I gave him my number that night! (Of course, it was under the guise of " call me if you get lost on way to the group's event we are now all leaving to drive to.") He was very shy. Hot shy kind of a guy. Best guys IMO!

 

Good luck! Here's a good hint that worked for me: After you meet a guy, mention that you are leaving to get a cup of coffee. If you are at a bookstore/coffee shop or close to one, the guy will often ask to join you.

 

Once in a grocery store a guy asked me how to cook some pasta dish , I told him he should send me a pic of his final dinner...And he asked for my number!

 

I must say that I'm a pretty heavy duty flirt. I find most great guys are a little shy and appreciate the green light I'm shining their way.

 

That said, i still feel shameless being so obvious, but I think many guys are afraid to approach or ask for your number. Subtlety is lost on them. Besides, when I've later asked men if I seemed obvious, they've all said No, just bubbly and friendly. To me, I was very obvious-- but not to them, I guess. So, go for it!

 

Besides, you can always play it off as simple friendliness or politeness if you accidentally misread their interest (which hardly ever happens !)

Edited by blueskyday
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