OwMyEyeball Posted August 25, 2014 Posted August 25, 2014 People don't develope feelings when just sex is involved? I'm sure some do. But when there's no socializing or emotional intimacy it's simply a relationship based on mutual pleasure; not much different than going to get a massage (except in that case it's pleasure for money). If someone finds even an FB situation to be stressful or confusing then they should reserve sex for committed relationships.
truth_seeker Posted August 25, 2014 Posted August 25, 2014 FWB seldom works because one of the two always catches feelings. 1
truth_seeker Posted August 25, 2014 Posted August 25, 2014 Amazes me how people seem to think that a fwb is only for the benefit of the man. My fwb is for MY benefit. We do it when I AM in the mood. I decide what act will be performed or not. He is happy to execute himself upon my wish. He never demanded anything, demeaned me, disrespected me or made me cry. Every time he sees me naked in front of him his eyes bright up and his jaw drops like it's the very first time and he's been my fwb for 3 years. Sounds like you got yourself a good sex slave
LoveIsABattlefield36 Posted August 25, 2014 Posted August 25, 2014 He definitely sounds like one to toss back into the sea. FWB - such an emotional gamble. Take time to heal your heart, OP. Go out with family or girlfriends. indulge in special interests or some pampering. He didn't deserve you.
SoleMate Posted August 25, 2014 Posted August 25, 2014 I agree FWB is a terrible idea for 97% of the population. And I'm shocked by the idea of a male "FWB" who is either unwilling or unable to do the job required. Why keep.......erm, "benefiting" with him then? Having a real r/s is no panacea, but most decent men in most r/s care about pleasing their partner sexually and make a lot of effort toward it. 1
ktya Posted August 25, 2014 Posted August 25, 2014 If I get it right... OP had a FWB it went along well. Then despite her trying hard to give the FWB a great sexual experience the FWB stopped trying to give her a great sexual experience as he was taking her for granted. He was claiming not being able to get it up yet he had to ED. Perhaps because she gave him oral to finish? Between any two partners you need to figure out a rhythm that works, an order of operations that results in maximum pleasure for both of you. Maybe you hold off on the BJ and the oral until the intercourse is over (depending on condom use), and use the BJ and oral to revive the vibe, or some other order. If the FWB isnt open to discussing the best order or the OP isnt open to trying a different order then maybe it wasnt meant to be. However if a guy has already gotten off and cant get it up again and needs to sleep for work the next day its hard to blame him. Sometimes you can get back in the game after 15-20 minutes. Sometimes you can just bang through it. Sometimes once the little man is down for the count, he's down for the rest of the night. What also is worthy of mentioning on the subject of erectile frustrations is the mood of your partner. I once had a chick insist on Shazaming a song that was playing on the radio right before I was going to stick it in. It killed the mood so bad I was done for sex for the rest of the night.
mightycpa Posted August 25, 2014 Posted August 25, 2014 I have faked many an orgasm because he did try to make him feel good. Again, you'd have done yourself a lot more favors if you'd just given some explicit instructions and set some expectations instead. I don't really understand why you cried in the first place, and I don't really understand why, after crying, you chose to continue with him. The great thing about being a girl and sex is that you can pretty much get sex from most guys just by asking. The fact that you're willing to do it NSA is a bonus. You give head, apparently to completion, bonus! You cum when properly attended to, bonus! You have no idea how valuable you are to a man. My advice to you is once you find a guy you want to do this with, and sit down and explain your expectations, and what you want in return for what you're offering. Explain the penalty for failure too, and you should be in good shape. 1
Author aprilisi Posted August 26, 2014 Author Posted August 26, 2014 Thanks for the good advice everyone. I feel better today. Still a bit pissed, but not so angry I'm crying lol I know I am partly at fault for not voicing my disappointment sooner. And when I started trying and he wouldn't listen it just got worse. I think the thing that made it just click with me was when he said get me hard again and I'll do _________. Then he just finished. I wasn't happy and said you lied to me, I hope you stay true to your word and laughed. Two hours later I woke up and tried and he pushed my hand away and said he was tired. That was when I said a few choice words and stormed out. I blocked him from my phone and facebook. My friend says he contacted her to tell me to please have me call him. But I've had enough. I'm not doing another fwb. And decided to delete every online dating profile. Time to work on me, get healthier. I've lost 70 pounds but I have a ways to go 2
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