Cavendish Posted August 24, 2014 Posted August 24, 2014 So today a little impulsively I decided to send underwear pics to my boyfriend of 4 months. I'm seeing him tomorrow and thought it would be fun to send the pics in advance. The photos were tasteful, and I thought they'd be a nice flirty gesture. His reply just said "Haha, what's all this?" and has made me feel really embarrassed. That was not the reaction that I expected and I feel a bit like I really misjudged the situation. I awkwardly replied something like "it was just a little surprise" and his response was "Oh, thanks." Not really sure what to do now. I thought all guys would want their girlfriends to send these kind of pics but feel like he just wasn't into it at all. I almost feel like he's judging me a bit, or thinks I'm a bit cheap. I'm so embarrassed to see him tomorrow and am not sure what I should do/say. Should I mention that his reaction hurt my feelings? I don't think he appreciates that sending something like that makes you very vulnerable and I'm upset by his lack of enthusiasm, as well as completely put off trying to surprise him with anything similar in the future. I guess I just want any wisdom or reassurance from here as I am feeling really crap about what happened. Thanks!
DazedandConfused8 Posted August 24, 2014 Posted August 24, 2014 Had he ever asked for them before? What made you decide to do this? You're right, he could be seeing you differently now that you've gone and done this incredible risky behaviour. Were you at least sure to keep your face/identifying features out of the photos? When you see him tomorrow, mention that you didn't appreciate his response and that you were doing it to surprise him and show that you were thinking of seeing him the next day. 2
Lernaean_Hydra Posted August 24, 2014 Posted August 24, 2014 I don't think you should be embarrassed in the least but I understand feeling a bit uneasy due to his lackluster response. However, not all guys are all that interested in racy pics and even the ones that are struggle with a response. Like, wait, do I send her one back? is that what she wants? or do I start dirty talking and telling her how I can't wait to bang her? Do I just send her a wink? The "correct" or expected reply varies from girl to girl so it's hard to know what's appropriate or what isn't. Maybe he liked them but was just surprised. If that's not something you do often or ever and your personality wouldn't suggest sending dirty pics is something you'd be into, perhaps he was just taken aback? Dazed is right, I think you should let him know how he made you feel when you see him again but don't get angry with him or over emotional. Also, for god's sake please be over 18 and please tell me your face was concealed. 1
sid3 Posted August 24, 2014 Posted August 24, 2014 It's a tough call without seeing the pics. I can't think of a reason why he would'nt have immediately replied with an enthusiastic message. If you were rocking the granny panties in the pics, perhaps.
DazedandConfused8 Posted August 24, 2014 Posted August 24, 2014 It's a tough call without seeing the pics. I can't think of a reason why he would'nt have immediately replied with an enthusiastic message. If you were rocking the granny panties in the pics, perhaps. 1
FitChick Posted August 24, 2014 Posted August 24, 2014 When you see him ask to see the pics of you on his phone to see how they turned out. Then grab the phone and delete them. Lesson learned! 2
bubbaganoosh Posted August 24, 2014 Posted August 24, 2014 Next time you see him, get his phone and delete them and start using common sense. Just my opinion, but keep your pants up when around a camera because you run the risk of other people seeing them and it's one thing when you clothed but in your drawers, it could be embarrassing in due time.
acapelo_dp Posted August 24, 2014 Posted August 24, 2014 I think the response would have been different if you were sexting and then he suggested you send some, or asked if he wanted to see something sexy. I think because you sent it so randomly, he didn't know how to respond to it. Especially if it was the first time you have sent those sort of pictures. I understand you feel embarrassed but I am sure he thinks you are hot, you are his girl. But usually that stuff happens in a sexual conversation (from my experience).
Elias33 Posted August 24, 2014 Posted August 24, 2014 He may have not known how to respond properly...it doesn't mean he didn't like them. Just a possibility. As for embarrassing, nah, own it. You'll be fine. So he may have not responded as you've like him to, but maybe he wasn't sure how to respond, for instance, he may have not wanted to sound disrespectful.
Eternal Sunshine Posted August 24, 2014 Posted August 24, 2014 This needs a little lead up. Some flirty banter and then "hey wanna see something ;)" etc. Maybe he was just shy and didn't know how to respond?
d0nnivain Posted August 24, 2014 Posted August 24, 2014 I would delete them but I would also talk to him about his lackluster response.
Els Posted August 24, 2014 Posted August 24, 2014 Not all guys want to receive pictures like that, especially from someone they've only been with for 4 months and out of the blue (ie no sexy talk leading up to it). I honestly don't think it's a great idea for you to do that, either, and if your face is in them you might want to delete them. LOTS of pics like this make their way online (and stay there for a very long time) after the couple breaks up.
DazedandConfused8 Posted August 24, 2014 Posted August 24, 2014 When you see him ask to see the pics of you on his phone to see how they turned out. Then grab the phone and delete them. Lesson learned! If she was worried about what he'd do with the photos, she shouldn't have sent them in the first place
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