Nana85 Posted August 22, 2014 Posted August 22, 2014 Hi , i am new here and i really feel lost. I have been married for 10 years now and yet i still feel that i don't fit in or belong with my husband and his family. I really loved him so much and still do but there is this void that is still empty when he is around. U see he comes from a family made of wanna be perfectionists and gradually i became his project to fix until he completely broke me. i can't say we pulled it through , probably he did but i can't get myself together after all what he did. I always thought that something is wrong with me when i hated sex with him but the truth is i ....hated him. it all started when we moved two years ago next door to his parents house and i had to deal with a full time free mother in law who hasn't hesitated for a second to come between us. in the meantime , i feel numb , he stopped taking me out to restaurants, he stopped celebrating birthdays, anniversaries and holidays because they thought it was a waist of money. All what they wish for is his command and i have lost my respect to him as a man when he chose to become their shadow . i stood up to him , to his mother , to his sisters , and all this took its toll on me. I only discovered that he doesn't have my back and in a split of a second he wud sell me out for them . i have thought about leaving him seriously but i didn't want my kids to go through the nasty war that i know he and his family wud put me through for custody , plus he is good to the kids and they love him i can't break their hearts or childhood. its the good times that i keep looking at and puts a smile on my face, i really can't take that away from them . Right now , i live, my answers are general and polite, i put on an acting face to his family and i feel numb . he doesn't know a single thing that i love, enjoy , think , wish to do. we are strangers who share the same roof.
d0nnivain Posted August 23, 2014 Posted August 23, 2014 Have you talked to him about this? Have you tried counseling or asked to move? When you marry your spouse is supposed to be your primary & your family of origin is supposed to come second but somehow it should all blend if you are lucky.
veryhappy Posted August 24, 2014 Posted August 24, 2014 Of course you don't belong there. Demand you move far enough for you. He needs to choose and quickly.
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