guest569 Posted August 22, 2014 Posted August 22, 2014 Facebook stalking him doesn't really show me much as he is very private. I was curious after having a dream that he wrote on Facebook that he has a new partner. I always wake up from these nightmares and have to relive the breakup again because in my dreams we are still together. But I see that he has liked some recent photos of friends etc. For some reason this surprises me. It's like, he is not actually dead.. he is still out there living his life. Why is this such a shock to me? I guess I am still stuck in January where he left me. It's hard to believe that he is still out there and not with me. It hurts.. One of the photos he liked was of his friend with his partner - they met at the same time as we did and look so happy together. Why aren't we? The bright side is that I haven't contacted him yet but I have been very tempted and thought about what I would say. I'm struggling to understand what I did to deserve being treated badly and spoken badly of by him. He attacked me about my life, career, personality.. everything. I was shattered to see his true colours. I really thought he was kind and genuine. He tried to help me through the breakup but ended up hurting me more with his advice because I see every piece of advice as criticism given the circumstances. For some reason I can not forget any of it. There's not really much point to this thread, I just need to get it out there.
Reels Posted August 22, 2014 Posted August 22, 2014 Considering how much you think of him, it becomes obviously that wherever you will go, you will find him.
JBlackstone Posted August 24, 2014 Posted August 24, 2014 What you said about him still living his life really resonated with me because it's so odd for me to wrap my head around too. I was with my bf for 4 years, we break up and go NC and it's like they never existed. Or rather like our relationship never existed. Try not to contact him. I've found out things about my ex since the breakup that disgusted me and I wanted to contact him to let him know how I felt but then I thought and then what? It wasn't going to change anything except probably make me feel worse. Life goes on, their lives continue without us but the good news is do do our lives and we can make them whatever we wish. So hang in there and focus on you right now! 1
lovelylilly Posted August 24, 2014 Posted August 24, 2014 I don't know if this helps, but I've always deleted and blocked my exs from fb. I have a love/hate relationship with fb, I can't bring myself to delet it completely because I rely on it so much for keeping up with long distance friends. But I feel like it brings me down. Every time I look at a photo, either of an ex, a photo an ex liked of commented on, etc...it's like a wound being reopened. Maybe you should block them? Try not to look at their page anyway. And I've never been able to understand how someone can just act like the relationship never existed.
Author guest569 Posted August 24, 2014 Author Posted August 24, 2014 I was with my bf for 4 years, we break up and go NC and it's like they never existed. Or rather like our relationship never existed. And I've never been able to understand how someone can just act like the relationship never existed. This is what really gets to me! But it makes sense, its really the only outcome of a breakup isn't it? Unless we pretend to form a friendship after it, the only option is to completely cut ties and pretend it never happened. It hurts that this comes a lot easier to him, I am still stuck in the past which makes it hard to believe things continue as we go our separate ways. Since the breakup the one thing i have not dwelled on was "I wonder what he is doing now" until the Facebook checkup. I wonder if he ever thinks of me, but thats it. It just feels really odd for us to be strangers. Life goes on, their lives continue without us but the good news is do do our lives and we can make them whatever we wish. So hang in there and focus on you right now! Good advice, thank you 1
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