justinje Posted August 22, 2014 Posted August 22, 2014 Hey All, So I have an interesting situation. I met this friend of a friend at a July 4th party and immediately I was attracted to her. She's my type physically and her personality is exactly what I'm looking for. Due to complications I didn't reach out to her until just a couple weeks ago (complications being that I was at the tail end of a relationship and don't cheat). I messged her and asked if she'd like to get a drink.............no response. So I put it out of my mind, two weeks later I get a message back saying she felt like an ******* and had seen the message but was at work and meant to send something back later but had forgotton, that being said she'd love to grab a drink. Okay, obviously a red flag for me, if she forgot about my message chances are she wasn't too excited but then again she didn't have to message me back to take me up on it. So I said no big deal that I'd still like to get a drink and we decide to wait another week until she gets back from a trip back home. So this past weekend I text her and ask if she's still down to go out, she says yes, I ask if Wednesday works......no response. Next day I text her saying I hadn't heard anything back and if she'd still want to go out Wednesday.....she apologized and said she fell asleep but that Wednesday worked. So turns out a friend of mine has a birthday that night and me and this girl are both invited by our mutual friend, she texts me and says why don't we go to that and grab drinks some other night, I say sure and ask if she had another day in mind to grab drinks......no response. So we see each other last night and had a great time, it wasn't akward, we were talking and laughing and she made an effort to talk to me as well. As I leave and my friend drives me home these mixed signals are driving me nutz. So I ask their opinion and they say to text her, say I'm still interested in grabbing drinks, but that if she didn't want to it was cool too, that way she has an out she can take if she isn't interested. So I do that......no response. So I'm pretty much done, this isn't my first rodeo and I do have self respect so I'm not going to keep putting myself out there to be ignored....but I just don't get why she ignores the messages. We have muual friends, we're going to see each other, why do that and make it akward? Just an fyi, she's single - confirmed that through our mutual friend Thoughts, critisims, etc are all welcome - apologies for the long post.
Dork Vader Posted August 22, 2014 Posted August 22, 2014 Okay when you date and you are the man you HAVE to take the lead. You don't want to come on overwhelming but you also don't want to come off as just a friend. You need to make appropriate physical contact with them. If they tense up back off.. If they are okay with it continue on. I firmly believe in a first kiss by the third date. You have to make it happen. Woman will RARELY make the first kiss happen. You have to be one hell of a catch in their eyes for that to happen. Women want a man that's confident, strong, respectful and so on.. They are looking at you as an "investment" if they invest themselves in you is it going to make them happy. So if you were to nice or friendly that is what produced mixed signals. She was interested and liked probably all the same things you did. But you can NOT lack the confidence and strength.
preraph Posted August 22, 2014 Posted August 22, 2014 I think now you just wait until she responds to find out if she is still interested or not. She may be one of those girls who has a lot going on and so she doesn't answer texts right away because she may have more than one guy asking her out and is not wanting to commit until she sees if he calls (or even if she had something pending with her friends or family it's possible). Busy popular people can't keep everyone happy all the time. The other alternative is she's rude, but you won't know that until you find out if she does this to everyone. Give her one more shot.
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