CaliBabe Posted August 21, 2014 Posted August 21, 2014 (edited) So here I am... Just days ago I discovered that the man that I love. Whom I had planned my future with has left me for another woman. He moved to another state and we tried to make the long distance thing work. He went through some very tough times thepast 18 months and I have stood by this man for no other reason than because I loved him. While he has been in this new environment, he met another woman and within days of meeting each other, he decided to start a new relationship with her and abandon me. He abandoned the one woman who loved him more than anything, who stood by him when he had literally nothing and more importantly who has proved her loyalty timeand time again. He has known this woman for no more than two weeks... We have been together for 3 years. He chose her. Something shiny and new. The past 72 hours have been some of the hardest I have ever felt in my life. I cannot explain the amount of pain and betrayal I am feeling. I have been crying nonstop, asking why this could to be happening to me when I try so hard to be a good person, and when this pain will subside. Why? Why? Why? No answers. I had a realization. I realized that no one can bring me happiness but myself. If I am spiritually healthy then my spirit cannot truly be broken, now can it? If I love myself as much as I should, then this man cannot break my heart now can he? My emotions come in waves. Maybe in the morning I am feeling sad and depressed, afternoon is a dull working couple of hours, and by night I am just okay. But then there are these instances where I feel like no matter what has happened this is truly his loss. Not mine. I have worked so hard to build my foundation to be what I want. I am successful, I am educated, I have wonderful family and friends who love and support me. I am loyal, and I know that I can love deeply. I have no other choice but to let go and live my life. This is my time to find myself, spiritually, and pursue my happiness. One day when the honey moon phase of his new fling ends and reality slaps him in the face he will ask himself, "WHAT THE F*CK DID I DO?!" I will live a happy life as I am doing the work to heal the right way instead of covering it up with drugs, drinking or someone new. He will regret abandoning a woman like me. He will realize how cruel he was to me and how he took me for granted. When that day comes... I will show him what he lost. One of my favorite quotes comes from the book Eat, Pray,Love by Elizabeth Gilbert: " Ruin is a gift. Ruin is the road to transformation." ...Remember that. Edited August 21, 2014 by CaliBabe 1
LostConfused123 Posted August 21, 2014 Posted August 21, 2014 I'm so sorry for your pain Cali. ((hugs!!))
sooshi Posted August 21, 2014 Posted August 21, 2014 I am also sorry for your pain, Cali. You deserve someone who won't abandon you and who will be as loyal as you are to them.
Requiem4Dreams Posted August 21, 2014 Posted August 21, 2014 I know exactly how you feel, however our situations are reversed. You came to a great epiphany about showing him what he's lost. The best revenge one can have is living a full and wonderful life, though I'm sure you'll come to the realization a little later that it's no longer about showing him what he lost, but more so just enjoying your own life.
Zahara Posted August 22, 2014 Posted August 22, 2014 Is this the guy you posted about in January? If it is, then thank your lucky stars. I'm glad he's with another woman, Cali, because that means it releases you from this man and allows you the opportunity to move on and seek better. You're going to be okay. (((Hugs))) 1
Recommended Posts