ashleysv Posted August 11, 2014 Posted August 11, 2014 Long story short: Met this guy online. We went on one date, he kissed me.. held my hand, etc. We were texting for 2 months before we finally met. He's really sweet and he always talked about our "future" together as boyfriend/girlfriend. Lately (the last 3 weeks) he hasn't been his usual sweet self and I had a feeling he was no longer interested. I tell him that as he goes 5 or 6 days without contacting me once then saying "hey sorry I've been busy" - too busy to send me a quick text, really? Anyways. I texted him back after he said he was busy with a "too busy to call, text or ever meet again. I shall move on" and I got a "please don't" in response. I let it be and he never texted back. It hurts cause I kind of wanted him to (silly, I know). I keep thinking to all the sweet things he's said previous, our first date, talking to him on the phone nearly everyday, etc. Though we weren't even dating I feel a little hurt that he doesn't even try to meet up again but doesn't want me to move on? SO. How do I get over him? I find that I keep checking out his online profile of the dating site we've been on.. I've deleted him from FB so I could stop myself from checking up on that, etc. Really though its to the point where I feel stupid for doing these things and stupid for hoping or thinking he'll contact me again. How do I get over him?
Philosoraptor Posted August 11, 2014 Posted August 11, 2014 This is a good reason to not spend so much time texting before meeting someone online. You develop such a high opinion of them, and romanticize your connection with them, before you meet and when it doesn't go well you get crushed. Understand you met him once, that was it. The connection wasn't there for him in person which is why he's flaking out on you. How to get over it? Take off the rose colored glasses and see him just the way he is, a flake.
d0nnivain Posted August 11, 2014 Posted August 11, 2014 You give yourself a stern talking to. You look at the facts: he's actions show you are not a priority. What are you going to achieve by throwing yourself at him? Think about all of your good qualities. Now stop pining for him & go out & find a guy who likes you as much as you like him. You don't need to be anybody's back up choice. You also need to realize that the reason he's too busy to date you is that he's spending his time with other women.
Jewels7 Posted August 11, 2014 Posted August 11, 2014 Try to quit looking at his dating profile. Easier said than done I know. I just found out last night my ex is on a dating website now and it was like a knife to my heart and I'm having trouble coping with it so I know how you feel. Just try to regroup. Hang out with friends as much as you can because that helps. I've also found self help books to be a great comfort too.
Author ashleysv Posted August 21, 2014 Author Posted August 21, 2014 Long story short: I met this guy online. We talked for 2 months, went on a date. He kissed me, said sweet things to me.. told me he wanted me to be his girlfriend, and then he slowly started to pull away. He'll text me every once in a while when he obviously has nobody better to talk to or needs is ego stroked. The dating site we are both on does have a block feature, but does not stop him from showing up in my locals (AND HE IS ALWAYS. THERE.) It's driving me insane. It still hurts that he obviously is no longer interested and I'm coping... slowly. (First time rejection stings and a girl like myself with already low self confidence... ouch). Would it be silly of me to take down my dating profile (again)? I don't think I'm quite ready to date, but I also want to shove it in his face that I am still looking. I'm sick and tired of seeing his profile show up in my locals or my matches, it irritates me. Advice anyone? Desperate here.
OwMyEyeball Posted August 21, 2014 Posted August 21, 2014 Do you know why you have low self-confidence? When it's all said and done, dating will be a pretty painful experience (when it's generally supposed to be a fun one) for you until you start to address that question. He's one guy. Out of millions. And you're one girl who's gone through the same experience as anyone else who has ever dated. It's common. That doesn't mean it doesn't suck, but going into things with a good sense of self and a strong self-confidence really do make the whole experience, and life in general, a lot more satisfying. And a lot less painful.
Reels Posted August 21, 2014 Posted August 21, 2014 Taking down dating profile will do nothing better, so you should do something about your self-confidence first. You should meet new people.
moonlightpath Posted August 21, 2014 Posted August 21, 2014 From the sounds of it you didn't really have a real relationship with this guy. So why are you stressing? Are you on OKC? If you are i think there is a "hide" feature. You can hide him and you'll never see his profile again. But he can see yours.
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