venusinlibra Posted August 18, 2014 Posted August 18, 2014 (edited) And the saga continues... the guy who I had dated a few times and had a great connection with has resurfaced, just when I thought it was over. After saying that I was "it" for him and pouring his heart out to me about his job troubles, then vanishing for a few weeks following other bad things that happened, communication between us has resumed. In a two week period, he got his pay cut at work, grandparent died, had a sports injury, and there was a five-alarm fire in his office building. Yikes. That is a lot, and I can understand why he'd want to be alone for a period of time. I was moving on with my life, and then he returned. I can't help but like him. He asked me if I was still on the dating website or dating anyone, and I told him that I wasn't. We kept talking and the conversation turned to him being kicked off of a dating website awhile ago (this site is notorious for shady practices), then he got really upset and said he didn't care anymore and didn't want to date anyway because his life is in shambles. I said that I wasn't surprised that he felt that way. We talked a little after that, but then he just disappeared again. What should I do? I was trying to move on, even though I do have a soft spot for him. I can be patient, but am very puzzled by what he said. Why ask me if I'm dating someone, then say he doesn't want to date? I personally think it was just a reaction to being kicked off of the website, kind of like he doesn't take rejection well. I have so many thoughts in my mind though, but would like to hear your opinions about the situation and what to do next. Edited August 18, 2014 by venusinlibra
Assasda Posted August 18, 2014 Posted August 18, 2014 What do you mean he "disappears". Does he not answer your calls? Does he dodge you in some way? 1
Author venusinlibra Posted August 18, 2014 Author Posted August 18, 2014 He just kind of drops off in mid-conversation. He even did that when things are well in his life. It's like he just decides that the conversation is over, and there is never an official "end" to it, such as "good night" or "have a good day", etc.
stillafool Posted August 18, 2014 Posted August 18, 2014 Considering you two were talking about him getting kicked off the website when he asked you if you were still on there or if you were dating; I would think his question was relative to the dating site. He didn't ask you out and didn't come around anymore after that conversation. 1
Author venusinlibra Posted August 18, 2014 Author Posted August 18, 2014 Oops, it wouldn't let me edit my above posting: He doesn't dodge me or avoid calls (even though I don't pester him), he just drops off, but he always responds to me otherwise. I wonder if this is his way of trying to get me to chase him?
Author venusinlibra Posted August 18, 2014 Author Posted August 18, 2014 Considering you two were talking about him getting kicked off the website when he asked you if you were still on there or if you were dating; I would think his question was relative to the dating site. He didn't ask you out and didn't come around anymore after that conversation. Actually, he asked me about my dating life in the beginning of the conversation; we talked about several other things and him being mad at the dating site didn't come up until towards the end of our discussion.
todreaminblue Posted August 18, 2014 Posted August 18, 2014 Oops, it wouldn't let me edit my above posting: He doesn't dodge me or avoid calls (even though I don't pester him), he just drops off, but he always responds to me otherwise. I wonder if this is his way of trying to get me to chase him? he said he doesnt want to date sounds like he is having major issues so be a friend to him, dont push anything and if you can handle his sometimes confusing behaviors, continue to be a friend..dont push him away........do not adopt his behaviors ....sounds like he needs a friend to talk to and you may be that friend..personally i wouldnt take anything above friendship at the moment with this guy until he was more stable.......deb 1
Assasda Posted August 18, 2014 Posted August 18, 2014 this doesnt sound like disappearing. Some people post here about guys just losing contact for a while this is not what is happening here. The guy sounds normal. If you want to talk to him. Talk to him then, but if he thinks the convo is over then its over. Seems like you really like him, or you wouldnt be worried about this, you should go out with him then. Plan an activity
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