candie13 Posted August 17, 2014 Posted August 17, 2014 hey, guys I think I've started to date a player - I am rather attracted to bad boys, I admit it. I am working on putting distance and playing it cool and doing my best to focus on my next exam which is in exactly 6 days. It is damn hard because I have the hots for him, but ... my will is stronger than whatever the hell it is that I am going through - lust, desire, temporarily blindness, you name it, haha! Oh, let's not forget an ENORMOUS amount of work for my exam too. Man, it's hard... Guys and boys - HELP. Post nice thoughts, "you go girl" ideas and songs, generally anything that can help me boost my self esteem, stay strong and focus and finally get my **** together (as opposed to being all teary and needy, like I feel. I've started to correct my actions too, less contact and colder too - the guy didn't ask me out again, with a bit of luck he'll leave me alone. I am too proud to be chatting him up - now if I could also find a way of cutting this weakness I have for him... man, that would be magic) counting on your support and merry messages, people! cheers
Keenly Posted August 17, 2014 Posted August 17, 2014 If you want him to stop contacting you, you need to tell him its over and there is nothing further between you two, rather than sit around and wait until he figures it out.
Author candie13 Posted August 17, 2014 Author Posted August 17, 2014 I don't know what the hell I want, K. I like the sob. He likes me too. It's a freakin' game. I told him to take a hike a couple of times - he stopped seeing his sex friends since we started hanging out (his bf is my closest friend, so I know that for a fact). Even took me out on a proper date - nothing indecent happened. But the insecurity kills me - I know, it's called dating. Anyway, I wanna hang out there and be strong. Updated my Tinder profile. Went out on a coffee date - boring. Setting up more dates with other men in the future. But I am swimming in the danger zone, everytime I am checking my phone, haha. Which is a lot less compared to yesterday. I gotta fight fight fight !
Author candie13 Posted August 17, 2014 Author Posted August 17, 2014 Girls have boobs and boobs are nice. So whenever you feel down, just look down at your own boobs and relax. It'll be fine. For me, it's the penis. Whenever I find myself in a bad situation where I should walk away, but I question how manly that is....I do a penis check. Yep, I got one. And then I walk away. I do have a beautiful pair of boobs and my arse is not that bad either, hahah! I'll go check myself in the mirror and try to feel better, hahaha, thanks, man! (pls don't check your penis too much... unless you generally likes penises, in which case, it's great, go check it out again )
JM89 Posted August 17, 2014 Posted August 17, 2014 Read The Single Woman by Mandy Hale. One of the most empowering reads ever! Mandy also has a great blog. Here's a post that touches on the "bad boy" complex: The Five Guys Most Girls Will Love at Some Point in Their Lives » The Single Woman - Single is the New Fabulous!
Liverpool Bloke Posted August 17, 2014 Posted August 17, 2014 The biggest problem in this world seems to be that all decent girls.quite rightly.,look to an `exciting`kinda guy.They see guys as 1 or the other,Geek or Bad lad with no middleground.There are the real diamond geezers around who struggle to find a decent girl because of this.Not geeks or even slightly weak because we treat women with total respect,in fact can and will fight to the death for the women we love(and win)I.e a bad lad against enemies.Trouble is,most girls love a guy who treats them like dirt because they see it as a sign of strength and self confidence whereas,in reality,it is because they have been spoilt as a boy by mummy,have not learnt to have good manners and decency and,as they seem to treat girls like pieces of meat with no genuine love for them,are probably closet gay.
Author candie13 Posted August 17, 2014 Author Posted August 17, 2014 Read The Single Woman by Mandy Hale. One of the most empowering reads ever! Mandy also has a great blog. Here's a post that touches on the "bad boy" complex: The Five Guys Most Girls Will Love at Some Point in Their Lives » The Single Woman - Single is the New Fabulous! great read, JM89. For sure, the bad boy complex. Giving up is a b*tch, but I guess there is no other way. The sooner the better. 1
rocketman122 Posted August 17, 2014 Posted August 17, 2014 you know you want it from him so "you go girl" go get it! haha
BlueIris Posted August 17, 2014 Posted August 17, 2014 Study and earn great grades. It’ll do you a lifetime of good that will likely outlast any guy you meet. These distractions will come and go. So shut down the dating distractions and kick butt on your exam. THAT will do more for you and your self-esteem than any person ever will. Good luck! PS. I had the same thing in college and briefly dated a guy whose nickname was Vlad, as in, “the impaler.” I had forgotten and your post reminded me. Oh, the memories. HAHAHA! Grades have meant much more in the long run. 2
Author candie13 Posted August 17, 2014 Author Posted August 17, 2014 you know you want it from him so "you go girl" go get it! haha Hell, for sure I want "it", but I prefer to die than to show my weakness. Peace of mind over a piece of arse. man, after the exam, I gotta start dating more.
rocketman122 Posted August 17, 2014 Posted August 17, 2014 Hell, for sure I want "it", but I prefer to die than to show my weakness. Peace of mind over a piece of arse. man, after the exam, I gotta start dating more. do him, he does you, twice or more and then youll itch will be scratched. youll be relaxed and focused. let him go muff diving, you get on your knees and it will put a smile on your face. I see a score of 100 in your future haha. and youll do well on the exam as well
Author candie13 Posted August 17, 2014 Author Posted August 17, 2014 I see your point, it actually worked perfectly for my first exam. The thing is, I don't mind playin' as long as it's clean. With time, it got blurry and the guy plays dirty - he wants to have me hooked onto him (it never is just about sex, is it?). Now, he is amazing in bed, I give him that, but he is not worth the mind****ing. I like his pretty lil arse, but I prefer my peace of mind and self esteem. So I recognize when I'm playing out of my league and I stay put. Boring? For sure. But hell, a lot safer too.
RonaldS Posted August 17, 2014 Posted August 17, 2014 The solution to this dilemma, like many others, is always one thing: threesome. 1
Author candie13 Posted August 17, 2014 Author Posted August 17, 2014 The solution to this dilemma, like many others, is always one thing: threesome. that would be: me, my books and my intact chastity for the next week or so, hahaha !
todreaminblue Posted August 17, 2014 Posted August 17, 2014 (edited) ill play dj for girls night goin retro now https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bf-bY0nOTvE just to get your shimmy on and bounce thoughts of that guy right out of your head.....hard core endorphin giver below better than sex...ok i lie just as good as...ok still a lie...feels good anyway then this to cool down with yeee harr...smilin....dance like theres no tomorrow...... good luck...stay strong....kick him to the kerb bad boys need to know what isnt on.....have fun be you....we dont need men to have fun.....we create our own fun.....and when we want to ....we burn it up..in style with class...dont need to show our ass .......get some girls together and go ...a little crazy lol....... .....deb Edited August 17, 2014 by todreaminblue 1
Author candie13 Posted August 17, 2014 Author Posted August 17, 2014 hey, deb u'r the best, thank you, girl ! no big deal, just a guy I slept with (and it was gooooood), nothing to worry about. Now, if on top of that, I liked him... I would have been in trouble. Just sex gets old for me quite quickly. Given that I've just understood it, it'll be easy sailing from now on. thanks a lot, d!
Author candie13 Posted August 17, 2014 Author Posted August 17, 2014 Study and earn great grades. It’ll do you a lifetime of good that will likely outlast any guy you meet. These distractions will come and go. So shut down the dating distractions and kick butt on your exam. THAT will do more for you and your self-esteem than any person ever will. Good luck! PS. I had the same thing in college and briefly dated a guy whose nickname was Vlad, as in, “the impaler.” I had forgotten and your post reminded me. Oh, the memories. HAHAHA! Grades have meant much more in the long run. Iris, thank you for a very wise post. Managing my emotions is my biggest weakness and the worst part to manage, during my exams, even worse than studying. The good part is now I understood what's bothering me, identified the why and didn't like the answer I have discovered, haha. Now that I cleaned up the mess, it'll be easy to close the loops. That exam is in my bloody pocket !!!
preraph Posted August 17, 2014 Posted August 17, 2014 When dating a player, that's the time to demand more and set higher standards of what you'll put up with, not less. Players eventually get tired of it being so easy and want a challenge and end up with someone who has self-respect and will make them earn them.
Author candie13 Posted August 18, 2014 Author Posted August 18, 2014 When dating a player, that's the time to demand more and set higher standards of what you'll put up with, not less. Players eventually get tired of it being so easy and want a challenge and end up with someone who has self-respect and will make them earn them. or... they get tired of somebody upping her game and do what they do best: continue chase same ol' thrills (easy sex with new women) because it's more fun and it's what they are best at . I guess we'll know the answer to that one pretty soon - people cannot hide their game forever. And this is where your contribution comes - by that time, I wanna be already up and running.
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