PNU Posted August 17, 2014 Posted August 17, 2014 Well, I'm not sure where exactly I begin so I'll just get to my points and questions. I want to hear everyone's advice so please don't be shy. I asked my girlfriend out the summer after my sophomore year in high school, she is a grade lower than I and we dated for over two years. She is 16 right now and I am 18. 15 days ago today we had the talk, the talk that would leave me depressed and in a slump for, well 15 days. My now ex and I had been fighting the night before we broke up and she was going to spend the night at a friends house (back to that in a few sentences). When my ex girlfriend broke up with me she said "I want to be free my senior year, I want to be able to go out with friends and no have to check in with you." As sad as that made me I respected her decision. Mistake #1 was checking her Instagram... As creepy as it sounds I was curious so I went on her Instagram to find she had been flirting with a 22 year old guy. I later find out she never spent the night at her friends house but was with the 22 year old and pulled an all nighter. She had her friend lie to her mom and she had lied to me. She insists she didn't physically cheat on me, and I believe her for some odd reason. She also told a friend that she had been thinking about breaking up for a while the 22 year old made it a lot easier. We had always been close, best friends of course, and "good kids". Don't get me wrong, we took each other's virginity but we never smoke or drank. Since we broke up she had sex with the 22 year old guy days after we broke up, smoked weed with him and her other girlfriends and began drinking a lot. I am extremely disappointed in the person she has become and can't figure out what happened to her. I just don't understand what snapped for her to turn into such a different person than I fell in love with. Another thing I cant understand is why I cannot get over her. I have rebounded already and slept with a girl but it wasn't as meaningful as my now ex and I keep waking up hoping she will text me. She has no problem ignoring me and that's what hurts a lot. She doesn't text or call because I don't know if she misses me at all. I don't understand how somebody can care so little after 2 years of "love". I hid everything she gave me but I miss her like crazy. I began the no contact deal about a week ago and accidentally, legitimate accident, ran into her and we talked a little bit but i haven't text or call her other than that. She brought up the 22 year old and said "we're friends, nothing else" but they went on a date a couple nights ago too. Her parents are divorced and she lives with her mom who goes out and parties a lot (never home) and doesn't talk to her dad much. Her parents always liked me and they're really cool people. I know going into college I will meet hundreds of awesome new people and forget about her but she was still such a huge part of my life. I miss her but am disgusted with the new her. Even though I say I would never get back together with her there's a little part in my heart that wants her back. Questions: 1) Why can't i get over somebody who is clearly over me? 2) Can we ever be friends? 3) Can I help her onto a path with more self-respect? 4) Will she ever come back/regret breaking up with me? Any other advice or tips are completely welcomed, sorry if i was vague about anything, I have a lot going through my head right now lol
ThorntonMelon Posted August 17, 2014 Posted August 17, 2014 1. Because it's only been 15 days. 2. Maybe someday, I suspect at that point you won't really want to be. You're young enough your relationship could evolve someday once the feelings get taken out of it. 3. I know you don't mean to sound ridiculous with that question but only she is responsible for her actions. 4. Probably. Amongst many, many emotions she will have about you.
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