tiarakitty Posted August 14, 2014 Posted August 14, 2014 (edited) Hi! My ex boyfriend is 19 while I'm 20. We had a 2 years relationship and we've broken up 2.5 months ago ago. We remained NC up until now and I'm doing much better. His reason for breaking up was that he felt he was too young, he needs to figure his life out, he can't commit, he felt like he was tied down. Over the years we were together, there are a number of time he kept telling me that but i never thought it is that serious until that will be the reason why we broke up. No, he didn't cheat on me. He is still single and is busy with his own projects and studies. His best friend told me when he bumped into me. His best friend told me my ex boyfriend have nothing but compliments for me. He did promise me right after the break up that he won't be dating or seeing anyone until 3 years later (when he finished his national service. now he is in last year of his diploma). I told not to make such promises and he can't go out whoever he wants to but he insisted with his promise. What do you guys think? Im not waiting for him but my parents insisted that maybe its great that i remain single now and 'somewhat' wait for me because they like him because he was a great young man and a boyfriend Do you think theres a chance that we might be together one day? considering our relationship is healthy and there was no arguments.. He expressed his signs of regrets through twitter (my friend told me without me asking her) like ''Retweet if you miss someone'', ''Kinda wanna text you but don't wanna feel like a idiot', 'You were always the best part of my life'' but apparently his last tweets were about a week ago ''Glad you are doing well now… truly. You won't be forgotten'' Yes its obvious all these tweets are for me.. do you think with that tweet he is saying goodbye..? like he doesn't want anything to do with me anymore? thanks guys Edited August 14, 2014 by tiarakitty
OwMyEyeball Posted August 14, 2014 Posted August 14, 2014 Sitting around waiting for someone else who's decided to move on is unfair to yourself. He's free to move on while you feel tied down by spoon fed hope. That doesn't mean you should spring into the next relationship opportunity that comes your way. You're both quite young and this type of behaviour is very, very common for your age group. You're both still figuring yourselves out and sometimes find that can be more readily accomplished outside of a committed relationship. He hasn't forgotten about you or thought "good riddance". He simply moved on. If he is a good guy then I'm sure he still holds you fondly in his heart. Right now he's just not ready to settle down and make commitments. Let him go and go find yourself. Maybe one day you'll reconnect. Just don't put any expectation on that. 1
Author tiarakitty Posted August 14, 2014 Author Posted August 14, 2014 Thanks for the great reply! Do you think that he felt out of love for me when initiating the break up or he felt like he has no other choice because he felt that he's just not ready to be committed.. but he still loves me at that point but he felt he had to let me go?
mightycpa Posted August 14, 2014 Posted August 14, 2014 Your parents have given you horrible advice. DATE, DATE, DATE! Dating is both shopping around, and practice for marriage. You learn how to get along with other people, how to be considerate, what you like, what you don't, etc. It's no different than sports, really. The more dating experience you have, the better mate you'll ultimately be. You might even find somebody else along the way, or, you might find that his qualities are exactly right. The chances that you'll meet a life mate that is right for you at the age of 17 or 18 is statistically super improbable. Why do you think this site even exists? Because so often in peoples' lives, the first try doesn't work out. Most people date several people before they find someone right for them. The law of large numbers says this is true for you too.
OwMyEyeball Posted August 15, 2014 Posted August 15, 2014 Thanks for the great reply! Do you think that he felt out of love for me when initiating the break up or he felt like he has no other choice because he felt that he's just not ready to be committed.. but he still loves me at that point but he felt he had to let me go? No one can answer your question. Anyone who tries is more than likely projecting their own desires, fears and experiences onto your unique situation. It's what we do. It's how we relate to others. Take the experiences you've gain in this relationship, cherish them, learn from them and chart your path.
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