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What's okay for 15 yr old? Where are they doing this?


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Posted

FYRWYFE, I just read in your other post that you are 32 years old!!!!

I see that someone was naughty and got pregnant at 16 and you're worried about your son being alone with his girlfriend at 16 now? :D

You will say that you don't want the history to repeat and you actually can't talk to your son about this and say "Don't repeat the same mistake I did and had you!" :p

  • Author
Posted

 

You're killing your son. Why shouldn't he have sex with his girlfriend? Are you one of those jealous mothers who won't let his son have sex with anyone?

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This is almost laughable. You are kidding right? I'm jealous - is that what you got out of my post? [/color]

 

I see that someone was naughty and got pregnant at 16 and you're worried about your son being alone with his girlfriend at 16 now? You will say that you don't want the history to repeat and you actually can't talk to your son about this and say "Don't repeat the same mistake I did and had you!"

 

[color=darkblue]I can't talk to him about it? Cause then he'll think he was a mistake if I try to say "don't do what I did", is that what you're gettin' at? Is that supposed to be an insult or something? Of course I don't want HIM to have a child at this age - it wasn't all that easy. Having sex = possibility of pregnancy. My mom was clueless as to what teens were doing when left alone, I'm not. I don't want him having sex at 15; at 15 their brains are not through growing, in fact, their sense of reason is one of the last things to fully develop, but hey, if you want to invite your sons girlfriends over for a nightcap, then have at it. Good luck to you.[/color]

what scares me about all of this is the attitude that i hear about among teens that oral sex doesn't count (fall out from the clinton scandal perhaps?). there are countless reports of girls giving guys bjs on the school buses, when they're in middle school!

 

[color=darkblue]Yes, this is scary. It's real though, and awareness is so important. I'm much different than my mom in that respect - I'm not clueless about what's going on. Had she paid more attention it'd been pretty obvious what I was doing with my boyfriend. Hell, she practically gave me permission by leaving me home all day while she worked. :o [/color]

 

 

 

 

  • 4 weeks later...
Posted

You're projecting your own fears on your son. Just because you got pregnant when you were 16 doesn't mean that his GF will too. They can use condoms and pills.

You ARE allowed from the moral aspect to tell your son that you were objectively too young to become a mother.

But what's immoral is your double standards; you're trying to supress his sexual desire while you did the nasty when you were 15. ;)

 

Regarding the oral sex...mothers convinced daughters and sons that sex is bad cuz you can make babies so it makes oral sex a great choice. :p

  • Author
Posted

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Actually RecordProducer, it's not just a pregnancy I'm concerned about, but the sex act as well. He is only 15 - just because I had sex at a young age doesn't mean it's okay for him to. It also doesn't mean I don't have the right to set boundaries with him either (THAT is something my mother should've done with me). I believe that no 15 year old is ready deal with a sexually transmitted disease or raising a child... and if they're having sex then those things are something they very well could have to deal with.

 

 

 

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Posted
Originally posted by fyrwyfe

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He is only 15 - just because I had sex at a young age doesn't mean it's okay for him to. It also doesn't mean I don't have the right to set boundaries with him either

 

 

 

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Word.

 

I did a lot of dumb things growing up and you better know that because I did them it doesn't make it okay for my kids to do the same...

 

While I understand that kid's grow up and are going to make thier own mistakes... it doesn't mean I would be all okay with certain things because I too had done them.. I want better for my kids.

Posted

Double standards aren't immoral. Failing to protect your son from the same mistakes that you made..... is a mistake.

Posted

And you will see why I totally agree with moimeme

 

"I am of the opinion that it is a bad idea for everyone, not just kids. Once you understand the biology of sex, you realize that you're playing with fire to start having sex. For whatever reason, we are created to bond through sex - which is fine, if you've picked someone good to bond with. However, more often than not, one of the people bonds harder than the other, finds out the other isn't a good deal to start off with, but ends up 'in love' anyway.

 

There are plenty of reasons why all humans should avoid sex until their relationships are fairly well established but niko presented the even more reasons it's not a good idea for younger people."

 

I dont regret my daughter I regret who I had my daughter with.

 

It took 3 years for my ex wife to go off the deep end, Now I realize not everyone is a psycho

But I worked In a building with over 300 women ,to like 10 men, and let me tell you I am not optomistic, about anyone especially in their teenage years potentially providing a stable family for a possible child.

 

I basically threw away my college for my ex wife, and then ended up having to raise my daughter, sure you hear about it constantly with reversed genders, but people are so de sensitized about everything that they really dont pay attention to our children.

 

My daughter tells me EVERY DAY how much she misses her mom , who left 8 years ago. Sure people get caught up in the heat of passion, sure they don't think about the consequences. You always hear about people telling their kids they will screw up their lives, too late, but the saddest thing is they end up screwing up their childrens lives as well, especially if they arent careful about who they choose to copulate with.

 

It makes me absolutely sick how selfish, and self absorbed I was, in what I did, and now I might be paying a minor toll for it, but my daughter will ALWAYS carry a FAR heaver burden that I ever will because Of a decision I made before she was ever conceived.

 

I have heard all the research all the BS heck I even tried to convince my ex that she should divorce her first hubby, "because It would be better for the children". Research, polls, statistics, facts, figures, and whatever so called data people can come up with are absolutely meaningless, when you are listening to a broken child weeping because she misses her mother.

 

And YES it is MY fault. And I was 19 God I can't imagine some of these poor kids that are younger.

You want some convincing Data to try and stop a teen cold maby they should start talking to the children that are the products of these broken families, produced out of recklesness.

  • Author
Posted
You want some convincing Data to try and stop a teen cold maby they should start talking to the children that are the products of these broken families, produced out of recklesness.

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You may be onto something! :laugh:

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Posted

Since we are living in a do as you please society, they will only silence their cries, with justification of their parents selfishness ,and calousness.

 

Remember parents no longer know whats best for their choldren, only the "scientist " do

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