LuvsTrucks2 Posted August 12, 2014 Posted August 12, 2014 Greetings LS, My question is for the ladies: I'm hoping to get some views on dating military men. From my personal experience and from the experience of my female friends, military men tend to be cheaters. I don't want to lump all military men into this category, but being single I seem to encounter this a lot. What gives?
todreaminblue Posted August 12, 2014 Posted August 12, 2014 Greetings LS, My question is for the ladies: I'm hoping to get some views on dating military men. From my personal experience and from the experience of my female friends, military men tend to be cheaters. I don't want to lump all military men into this category, but being single I seem to encounter this a lot. What gives? no military men are not all cheaters they have opportunity to cheat when deployed..... and some will and some dont give any man opportunity and he might......or he might not depends on the man... i am ex military....i respected the men who were on base with me for the most part, there were dicks dont get me wrong ...such is life...good guys and bad guys....same deal....... women love miltary men...for many reasons...a military man has discipline normally......skills....and drive and determination..they walk taller with more presence as soldiers..back straight eyes forward clear vision......i can spot them and i hear it in their voices...they arent brash or rude they are polite and courteous but mess with a soldier and you have a situation...........all masculine traits so all in all i would say women love masculine men in and out of uniform...uniform just makes them recognisable as being that way..females are often drawn to men in uniform......because they look damn fine....as do men with black and whites and also suits and ties with determined eyes....these men are not arrogant they are just men.....and most of them are loyal....to the core.........deb
PegNosePete Posted August 12, 2014 Posted August 12, 2014 I would say the number of military men who cheat while deployed, is about the same as the number of military men's partners who cheat on them while they're deployed. 2
todreaminblue Posted August 12, 2014 Posted August 12, 2014 I would say the number of military men who cheat while deployed, is about the same as the number of military men's partners who cheat on them while they're deployed. opportunity knocks both ways......deb
Author LuvsTrucks2 Posted August 12, 2014 Author Posted August 12, 2014 What about dating military men from OLD? I've recently been contacted by a man who is military, will retire in a year due to mandatory retirement. We have been talking on the phone as well as texting and plan to meet this weekend. He seems genuinely interested but I am seeing some red flags: he's online a lot; he's been a bachelor for about 10 years since his divorce; he's been told he's a ladies man. Should I NEXT him?
todreaminblue Posted August 12, 2014 Posted August 12, 2014 What about dating military men from OLD? I've recently been contacted by a man who is military, will retire in a year due to mandatory retirement. We have been talking on the phone as well as texting and plan to meet this weekend. He seems genuinely interested but I am seeing some red flags: he's online a lot; he's been a bachelor for about 10 years since his divorce; he's been told he's a ladies man. Should I NEXT him? i dont know if you should next him who told you he was a ladies man...was it him? if he did he let you know he wont be faithful to you...if you want a faithful partner ask him if he would be one has he lied to you about anything....or is he honest.....deb
Author LuvsTrucks2 Posted August 12, 2014 Author Posted August 12, 2014 He told me that he is told a lot that he is a ladies man. I know...all the signs are there, I just guess I needed confirmation.
todreaminblue Posted August 12, 2014 Posted August 12, 2014 He told me that he is told a lot that he is a ladies man. I know...all the signs are there, I just guess I needed confirmation. thats not something i would feel comfortable with a guy i was dating saying that to me i would question him straight up..i would ask why do you think they say that about you....i would be building walls if a guy i was dating said that to me and preparing to move on, in light of his answers............deb
Author LuvsTrucks2 Posted August 12, 2014 Author Posted August 12, 2014 Thanks everyone for your insight, you basically confirmed what my gut was saying. 1
d0nnivain Posted August 12, 2014 Posted August 12, 2014 Luv2Trucks I don't see any of those as red flags. Military men know how to make a commitment. Think about it -- the put their lives on the line every time they are deployed. If you show them the same loyalty you will get it back 10 fold. You don't know why he was a bachelor for 10 years. He may have become a hermit of sorts because his EX hurt him so badly. The fact that he is a "ladies' man" simply means he treats women well; it doesn't automatically mean he's a player. Yes, OLD breeds GIGs but you can't know that until you meet the man in person Since his military career is ending, he may be ready to settle down.
Candy_Pants Posted August 12, 2014 Posted August 12, 2014 I don't date military men. We're generally not very compatible. And yes, I've also heard they tend to cheat.
d0nnivain Posted August 12, 2014 Posted August 12, 2014 Saying all military men cheat is painting with an awfully broad brush. DH is a Marine. He could no more cheat then he could commit treason. Twenty years later many of the guys in his platoon are still married to & genuinely in love with the girls they dated when they were 18 year old privates. The ones who are divorced primarily had their marriages / relationships ruined when the women cheated while they were deployed. It takes a special person to keep the home fires burning. Of the guys in his platoon, I don't' know any cheaters.
carrie_o Posted August 12, 2014 Posted August 12, 2014 Military men have more opportunities to cheat by being separated a lot more than normal relationships. I don't doubt that some cheat. It makes it hard to trust when you don't know where they are or what they are doing. In a lot of cases, they can't answer those questions even if you ask. If he is getting out soon, then you will be lucky enough to avoid most of that. Be careful that he doesn't have an extremely traditional attitude. Too many military men get warped by their masculine environment. They start thinking women belong in the kitchen and that the women shouldn't have jobs because it is the man's job to support the family. Not all military men are like this but it is something to look out for. 1
Keenly Posted August 12, 2014 Posted August 12, 2014 I've seen two women cheat on their man while they were deployed. One got knocked up when he was awayso I guess its just whoever is the worse person.
hasaquestion Posted August 12, 2014 Posted August 12, 2014 This whole "military men are cheaters" thing is stupid. Give a bunch of people who aren't in the military big arms and washboard abs, and have them move to a different continent, and see how that goes. 1
No Limit Posted August 12, 2014 Posted August 12, 2014 A couple of months ago a soldier posted in this forum about his wife being pregnant with another man's child while he was deployed. In another forum I read how a guy was dumped by his cheating GF for another guy; said guy worked in the military, and years later while driving home the poster said he saw his ex running out of her and her then-husband's house and into a car to another guy and started kissing him. That chick probably picked a military guy so she could cheat in peace. Personally, I thought men had better things to do and other things in mind while deployed rather than screwing around. Then again, I guess they do have a lot of spare time when stationed in military bases far from the troubled parts of the world.
Author LuvsTrucks2 Posted August 14, 2014 Author Posted August 14, 2014 Looks like military man is flaking out on me, indicated that he will have to go out of town to help a buddy with funeral services. I told him to catch up with me next week, benefit of the doubt?
d0nnivain Posted August 14, 2014 Posted August 14, 2014 Looks like military man is flaking out on me, indicated that he will have to go out of town to help a buddy with funeral services. I told him to catch up with me next week, benefit of the doubt? Why would you think that he's flaking on you if somebody he cared about died? Good people drop everything when a lifelong friend is in crisis. I'd definitely give him the benefit of the doubt. The fact that you are questioning this makes me wonder about extending that benefit to you. 2
Author LuvsTrucks2 Posted August 15, 2014 Author Posted August 15, 2014 I have given him the benefit of the doubt, we talked this afternoon and he said he was really surprised that I didn't kick him to the curb, he said any other woman would have, he also said that he was really happy we talked about it. I really don't want to prolong a meet but I do understand that these things happen. Extending him this benefit of doubt is exactly what I would want someone to do for me, so we shall see how things progress.
carhill Posted August 15, 2014 Posted August 15, 2014 He's retiring, probably on a good pension and with a secondary career in mind. Staying the course and surviving to retirement says a lot about his character and awareness. If you otherwise enjoy your interactions, meet with him this weekend and see how it goes. It's just a meeting
d0nnivain Posted August 15, 2014 Posted August 15, 2014 I have given him the benefit of the doubt, we talked this afternoon and he said he was really surprised that I didn't kick him to the curb, he said any other woman would have, he also said that he was really happy we talked about it. I really don't want to prolong a meet but I do understand that these things happen. Extending him this benefit of doubt is exactly what I would want someone to do for me, so we shall see how things progress. Great! I'm glad you were able to do that. Hopefully the chat increased the trust level for both of you. 1
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