Jewels7 Posted August 11, 2014 Posted August 11, 2014 I broke up withy ex 3 months ago (you can read more of my story under abuse and violence). The first two months were awful and the third started getting a little better. I have had brief moments of being okay and the crying has eased up. I've been trying to keep my mind off of him but started feeling down so decided to listen to sad songs that I haven't been able to listen to since the BU and just cry it out. Well then I got curious and just typed his name into google. That's when I found out he was on a dating website. I'm devastated now. I'm definitely not ready to date and I guess it just hurts that he is. Especially when he told me a month ago he hasn't been with anyone else and that he could travel the world a 1000 years and never love someone like me and yada yada. I shouldn't be hurt over him because he didn't treat me well but this has definitely set me back. Who else has experienced this?
Miss Match Posted August 11, 2014 Posted August 11, 2014 I'm not going to hunt around for your other thread, but did you break up with him because he was violent or abused you? Healing takes the time that it takes. It's different for everyone. Just cause he is on a dating website, doesn't mean he is ready to date. It's good that you are allowing yourself to feel this and move through it. It will get better, I promise.
Author Jewels7 Posted August 11, 2014 Author Posted August 11, 2014 Not like your typical abuse. I questioned whether it was. He used to "rough house" and thought it was funny to burn my arm hairs off with a lighter and cover my nose and mouth so I couldn't breath. When he wanted to "wrestle" I would always end up hurt and crying and he just told me I whined too much. I left him however because he said violent things that just didn't sit right with me (like threatening to kill people). I was scared one day he would lose his temper and go too far. Seeing his dating profile made me remember all the good though and the guy I fell in love with. I shouldn't care if he dates someone else but I do. Just hurts so much. I really thought I was doing better until I found that.
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