bigapple98880 Posted August 10, 2014 Posted August 10, 2014 My ex and I go to the same university and she is a year younger than me. We were on and off for the entire last school year while she was a freshman. The beginning of our relationship she was very closed off and didn't really want to be in a relationship. She resented the relationship and thought she needed to be single and have a true college experience. We have great chemistry together and she dumped me and then we got back together until the end of the school year. We were planning on breaking up before the summer. She needed to have her space and feel independent. She always felt a little guilty about being in the relationship. We were very back and forth and she did not know what she wanted. All the while in the this relationship i was very open (a little too open) and she was much more closed off. We ended the school year together and were both had very strong feelings for each other. We did on and off no contact in the summer and tried to meet up twice during the summer(we live in different cities) both times we end up canceling due to not knowing what we wanted. Every time we began to talk again it felt natural and we both enjoyed it. Recently we ended up meeting up. She was very excited to see me and we were supposed to hangout and get dinner for the night. We end up kissing and having sex. Before the sex she tells me that she already knows that she will be single in the fall semester and I'm ok with that and tell her that it will be good for both of us. We hadn't seen each other in a while and both realized we have both changed for the better. She is more open and i am more closed and confident. We also talk about that possibility of starting fresh and trying again. She tells me she isn't scared about that thought but is not committing to anything. I agree as something like that shouldn't be committed at this point. We then have sex and it feels right and we still have great chemistry. Right after i tell her i should probably leave. She starts crying and doesn't understand why. I tell her its because i still love her and she tells me that she still loves me swell. She was upset as it was a lot to process at once and wasn't expecting it. She asked me to say as she was crying and didn't want to let me go. Later she tells me to take care of myself and that she will always have feelings and that we just need to ignore them right now. I still love my ex and want to start fresh at some point. How do i keep it open for us to have a chance, but avoid giving myself hope and enjoy myself begin single and not feel jealous over what she's doing? Do we still have a chance of getting back together in the future? Should we hangout and do something(go on dates) once every couple of weeks to keep something between us? I don't want to loose her but also don't want to scare her away. Also she said we shouldn't have sex when were back at school to avoid any back and forth. Do i try to have sex or avoid it with her? Any advice is much appreciated. I know i will be single this fall but want to know the best way to enjoy being single but also keep us open to a possible future relationship
amaysngrace Posted August 10, 2014 Posted August 10, 2014 This is similar to your other post. And still no paragraph spaces Listen, if you do get a chance to have sex with her again, which I highly doubt you will, don't leave right after and make her cry. Guys who do that don't deserve the girl.
Assasda Posted August 10, 2014 Posted August 10, 2014 Sounds like you stong armed her in a relationship somehow in the begininng. At least youre honest about it. Move on man, move on. Give the poor girl some space and let her live her life
Author bigapple98880 Posted August 10, 2014 Author Posted August 10, 2014 I never once strong armed her in the relationship. I never treated her poorly and always respected her. It was the wrong time when we were together. She didn't really want a relationship but didn't want to lose me. When I walked out I stayed for a little and talked to her and let her speak her mind. She completely understood why I did that and it is very unlike how I usually acted around her. I believe we deserve a second chance as we have great chemistry and get along well. I think the timing of us was the problem we faced in our relationship. I just want to know how I can keep us open to a future relationship while giving her space, but not completely losing her, as in how Much contact should I try to establish. When we talk we are very friendly and it feels natural. We've both changed a lot over the summer and it seems we would be great together. The reason we ended it in the spring at the end of school for her to be single and have a college experience as she felt she wasn't independent enough and was missing out. Our last day together she was very emotional and cried a lot. This is not typical of her at all during our relationship, so I know she cares deeply for me. Any advice of how I can protect myself from being hurt but keep us open to a second chance with her? She is very attractive and outgoing and will have many guys all over her. I'm not sure how much I should do to keep us open.
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