irc333 Posted August 9, 2014 Posted August 9, 2014 I have noticed a couple of people in our Meetups (particularly one), that are known for their on again, off again - yo-yo relationships. There's this one guy that had dated this woman exclusively for a good while...she was actually separated while she was dating him, but when they divorced...she went back with her ex-husband/new boyfriend. Apparently, he's been carrying a torch for her ever since then as he was still fawning over her. Since then, I usually see him come alone to the events, thinking he had moved on...then occasionally, he'd come in with her as his date. Happened twice, but then after that...you'd only see him come solo to the events. Another person had this unstable, on again off again relationship with each other...then all of a sudden they announced their engagement at a Meetup event. I was wondering, to these Yo-yo relationship eventually "stick"?
preraph Posted August 9, 2014 Posted August 9, 2014 I think there's a lot of people who love each other but can't live with each other or maybe be with each other for whatever reason. Or want to sleep together but don't love each other. It can go on forever intermittently, between divorces, etc. 1
smackie9 Posted August 9, 2014 Posted August 9, 2014 They are too insecure to actually find someone better.
Assasda Posted August 10, 2014 Posted August 10, 2014 I think diffeent things work for different people. I think time away heal some wounds. Who knows, if it works, it works
Phoe Posted August 10, 2014 Posted August 10, 2014 2 friends from high school yo-yo'd a lot and finally got married a few years ago. The girl ALWAYS seemed disinterested with him. Never seemed into it. He was MAD about her and thought she was the best thing in the world. Then the on and off started. She went off and banged a bunch of different dudes. I had a conversation with him once during this time and he broke down and started calling her a slut and a whore and how much of a nasty disgusting girl he thought she was. 4 months later they were engaged. *sigh* whatever, I guess... haha
somedude81 Posted August 10, 2014 Posted August 10, 2014 I wonder how those things even got started. I tried to reconnect with my ex and get into a yo-yo relationship, but she cut the string
leavesonautumn Posted August 10, 2014 Posted August 10, 2014 I think there's a lot of people who love each other but can't live with each other or maybe be with each other for whatever reason. Or want to sleep together but don't love each other. It can go on forever intermittently, between divorces, etc. Describes my ex and I perfectly. We loved each other very much but just could not make it work for various reasons. Communication was the biggest issue and then once we were able to make it work (for the most part) our family and friends were fed up with us so it became a secret when we were together. Best friends and the sex was phenomenal. Doesn't mean we were meant to be and we were both frustrated about it a lot. It was confusing. There could be a lot of factors as to why they just don't work. One person cares about the other more, both insecure, not compatible but chemistry is high. I'd say it's different for every off/on couple.
Author irc333 Posted August 10, 2014 Author Posted August 10, 2014 You should ask those people you're talking about. Why should I? When I could just ask my question here?
Kamila Posted August 10, 2014 Posted August 10, 2014 I wonder how those things even got started. I tried to reconnect with my ex and get into a yo-yo relationship, but she cut the string My ex actually tried for years to reconnect, but I didn't allow it. Why ? Because I know it won't work out. We're too different.
Author irc333 Posted August 10, 2014 Author Posted August 10, 2014 My ex actually tried for years to reconnect, but I didn't allow it. Why ? Because I know it won't work out. We're too different. I think what happens is....when people break up...they start dating other people...usually that doesn't work out for them, get sick of the dating..and go back to WHOM they are familiar with..which is their ex. Usually its an act of desperation or fear of being alone that drives them back together. It's a form of settling.
phineas Posted August 10, 2014 Posted August 10, 2014 I stopped going to the meet-up group because it was basically the same people from the POF parties and everyone has dated everyone else over the last few yrs on and off.
somedude81 Posted August 10, 2014 Posted August 10, 2014 My ex actually tried for years to reconnect, but I didn't allow it. Why ? Because I know it won't work out. We're too different. Yeah that makes sense. Though in my case, my ex and I were extremely similar. Oh well, she did what she did.
Kamila Posted August 10, 2014 Posted August 10, 2014 Yeah that makes sense. Though in my case, my ex and I were extremely similar. Oh well, she did what she did. What I meant is we aren't 'compatible'. Two people can be 'different' but still complement their lives. My ex was just not for me. I think what happens is....when people break up...they start dating other people...usually that doesn't work out for them, get sick of the dating..and go back to WHOM they are familiar with..which is their ex. Usually its an act of desperation or fear of being alone that drives them back together. It's a form of settling. That's what I'm afraid of, that he wants me back and regrets what he did. I don't want to succumb to him and realize that he's not the guy for me. I'd rather be alone and find the right guy for me. Even if it will take more pain and time.
smackie9 Posted August 10, 2014 Posted August 10, 2014 I only had a few that wanted to date again....I just laughed in their face. There is no way I would date an ex....it ended for a reason, why revisit that crap again.
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