aprilisi Posted August 8, 2014 Posted August 8, 2014 Supposed to meet man yesterday. He wanted me to come to his house, no. I'll meet you somewhere. We set up 6pm at walmart. I know, but he's a widower with 3 kids so I say ok. I tell him to call if he's going to be late. I get there on time. I wait 10 min then message him to call when he's coming. I have driven over 15 miles to meet him, he is local. I hear nothing so at 6:30 I head home. A few minutes later I get a message where am I? I told him I left and he says his son was sick. Good excuse. But I'm almost home. I was meeting him after work because of the short distance, my work is over 20 miles from my house. He asks again if I can come to his house. No. I have a feeling he wants to get me to his house. Do you guys think I'm being paranoid abbout this, Should I try another public meetup?
d0nnivain Posted August 8, 2014 Posted August 8, 2014 Kids get sick but presumably the kid was sick at 5:45 so he could have called before 6 If you otherwise like him I would give him the benefit of the doubt & set up another public meeting but probably not at a WalMart. Isn't there at least a pizza place in the strip mall where the store is. He may be out of the dating scene so long that he doesn't realize that it's inappropriate for him to keep asking you to come to his home, especially if you are one of the 1st women he dated since his wife died. Tell him he's sending you a bad message.
Allumere Posted August 8, 2014 Posted August 8, 2014 ..are you really that interested? Not going to a stranger's house is smart, not paranoid. Unless you have done a full background check on this guy you really know nothing about him. I also think there needs to be effort on his part (both should put in effort) so neutral ground is best all the way around. Not contacting you that he was running late was rude. Now I am not a parent but I have dated Dads so certainly experienced the running late or re-schedule thing which doesn't bother me...but I wasn't left hanging. Follow your gut. 2
TXGuy Posted August 8, 2014 Posted August 8, 2014 Generally, I can see the guy's side of the story. But I just cannot here. He simply stood you up. Even assuming his kid was sick, he should have called you. A last minute cancellation is annoying, but forgivable. Standing someone up is not. And that doesn't even take into account his insistence on meeting at his home. For a first date! I think you should just forget about this guy. For a variety of reasons.
PegNosePete Posted August 8, 2014 Posted August 8, 2014 I would not give this guy another chance. He has already blown it 3 times by asking you to his house (totally inappropriate for a first meeting) and Walmart car park (romantic location??). How many more chances are you going to give him? It's pretty obvious he's only after sex anyway. What a classy guy. Really. Next! 3
longjohn Posted August 8, 2014 Posted August 8, 2014 (edited) I think if I where the OP I'd run a mile right now. If the guy can't show up on time, cant call/text to explain without wasting your time and wants to meet in a car park I'd say you can do better. Seriously though, what kind of "man" invites a stranger over to his house if he has children? What type of person wants to meet at walmart of all the places on earth LOL. Maybe I'm picky but I tend to avoid those types. The whole thing to me screams of guy looking for booty call. Edited August 8, 2014 by longjohn
Gaeta Posted August 8, 2014 Posted August 8, 2014 I dump automatically any man suggesting I go to his house for a first meeting. This is NOT the type of men I want to meet. I don't even care if the man says ok ok ok we'll go to a coffee shop instead, the ONLY fact he offered his house has a meeting place I dump him. If he cannot get off his fat @ss, put a pair of pants on, and drive to a coffee shop then he's no good. Second, what kind of father invites over strangers? Whether the kid is there or not is irrelevant, this is the home of a child, his child and it's not to be the playing ground for online meetings. This man would have lost respect in my eyes as a man and as a father. 3
Author aprilisi Posted August 8, 2014 Author Posted August 8, 2014 My gut says not to r/s just wanted some adviice, thought maybe I was just being paranoid I tend to do that I only agreed to meet him there because he said he couldn't find a babysitter and would have his kids in the car. So, no date. He says he wants a relationship but my spidey senses are tingling. Sometimes the tingle for no reason. Like my current FWB, big time tingling at the first meeting. But 6 months later I feel supeer comfy with him. And to tell the truth, wasn't excited about it at all. Not attracted to his pics. I think I'll go with my gut on this one
Author aprilisi Posted August 8, 2014 Author Posted August 8, 2014 I dump automatically any man suggesting I go to his house for a first meeting. This is NOT the type of men I want to meet. I don't even care if the man says ok ok ok we'll go to a coffee shop instead, the ONLY fact he offered his house has a meeting place I dump him. If he cannot get off his fat @ss, put a pair of pants on, and drive to a coffee shop then he's no good. Second, what kind of father invites over strangers? Whether the kid is there or not is irrelevant, this is the home of a child, his child and it's not to be the playing ground for online meetings. This man would have lost respect in my eyes as a man and as a father. Didn't even think of this, he doesn't even know me and he's letting me near his children. I could be a child molester for all he know 1
CaliGypsy Posted August 8, 2014 Posted August 8, 2014 I think your gut is not steering you wrong. I would definitely not reschedule
guest569 Posted August 8, 2014 Posted August 8, 2014 Avoid him.. He's not making much effort for a first date, not a good first impression.
Author aprilisi Posted August 8, 2014 Author Posted August 8, 2014 Just got a message from him saying he's in my town. He drove all the way there wanting to see me. He says where do you want to meet. Then gets angry when I say I'm not in town. Seems like my gut, and everybody else was right
fred123 Posted August 8, 2014 Posted August 8, 2014 you have a current FWB and ur dating other guys? erm that is a no no
Author aprilisi Posted August 8, 2014 Author Posted August 8, 2014 I don't see why not. I go out on one, maybe three dates. If it had potential to go further I would end the FWB arrangement immediately. Also, if I was a man would you be saying that? 2
preraph Posted August 8, 2014 Posted August 8, 2014 Sounds like he's got his hands full and probably just looking for a babysitter anyway. I "broke up" with a friend because all she wanted me to do is come over and go pick up her grandkids and sit with her at home while she watched them.
kolleamm Posted August 8, 2014 Posted August 8, 2014 No offense but this sounds like the beginning of an episode on the Crime Channel.
Gaeta Posted August 8, 2014 Posted August 8, 2014 I only agreed to meet him there because he said he couldn't find a babysitter and would have his kids in the car. He's officially an irresponsible idiot for suggesting he'd have to leave his children in the car, AS IF it were even an option.
RonaldS Posted August 9, 2014 Posted August 9, 2014 Generally, I can see the guy's side of the story. But I just cannot here. He simply stood you up. Even assuming his kid was sick, he should have called you. Hmmmm....I don't know. I've had my kids go from fine to barfing all over every square foot of the house in a matter of minutes. I've never had a date lined up when it's happened, but given the severity I've dealt with when they've gotten sick like that, I wouldn't have bothered to call or text the girl either.
RonaldS Posted August 9, 2014 Posted August 9, 2014 He's officially an irresponsible idiot for suggesting he'd have to leave his children in the car, AS IF it were even an option. Oh, oops....I didn't see that post, haha. Does this guy think it's still 1977? You can't leave your kids in the car while on a date. That's hilarious.
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