rainy_sun Posted August 5, 2014 Posted August 5, 2014 I'm a bit thrown by this. I haven't spoken to my ex in around 3 months (since the start of May). Total no contact other than a PayPal email for some money she owed me a week after we broke up, but that had no message attached or anything so I don't think that counts. Anyway, I just got an email tonight from PayPal saying that she randomly sent me $20 dollars. What the hell do I do? There's no message attached or anything so I don't know what it's for. It's probably a mistake but I have literally no idea to be honest. The only thing that I could possibly think is that she moved out of our old apartment and it's money from the Landlord or something but even that seems far-fetched. How would you handle this?
deathandtaxes Posted August 5, 2014 Posted August 5, 2014 Wait a few days to see if a message is forthcoming about the money. If nothing, then do whatever. You can send it back via paypal or spend it or find a deserving charitable organization. But don't message the ex. Stay NC.
Ronni_W Posted August 5, 2014 Posted August 5, 2014 Total no contact other than a PayPal email for some money she owed me a week after we broke up It seems she owed you some money...and...now she's sent you some money. Sometimes one plus one just equals two. If it is not for the full amount that she owed you, then it would be reasonable to expect to receive more such payments in the future. Spend the money or save it. That's all. It isn't an excuse to go contacting her about it.
Author rainy_sun Posted August 5, 2014 Author Posted August 5, 2014 It seems she owed you some money...and...now she's sent you some money. Sometimes one plus one just equals two. If it is not for the full amount that she owed you, then it would be reasonable to expect to receive more such payments in the future. Spend the money or save it. That's all. It isn't an excuse to go contacting her about it. But she paid me for everything she owed back in May so I don't think it's that. It's a very small amount too. Also, if I accept the money, she'll see that I have and won't in a way that be contacting her?
Ronni_W Posted August 5, 2014 Posted August 5, 2014 But she paid me for everything she owed back in May Ah...that's very different. My apologies. Could just be a genuine error, then...maybe her bookkeeping is off, or she just clicked a wrong 'payee' during her PayPal transaction. Given that she might now think that she's settled some other debt but really has not done so, it might be the fair and decent thing to just return it through PayPal with a message like "prior debt paid in full in May 2014." NO...this is a super-weird situation, and would not mean any breaking of the spirit or purpose 'no contact'...although I'm sure my opinion can be argued against.
Author rainy_sun Posted August 5, 2014 Author Posted August 5, 2014 Ah...that's very different. My apologies. Could just be a genuine error, then...maybe her bookkeeping is off, or she just clicked a wrong 'payee' during her PayPal transaction. Given that she might now think that she's settled some other debt but really has not done so, it might be the fair and decent thing to just return it through PayPal with a message like "prior debt paid in full in May 2014." NO...this is a super-weird situation, and would not mean any breaking of the spirit or purpose 'no contact'...although I'm sure my opinion can be argued against. Thank you, I declined the payment with your suggested message.
SoThatHappened Posted August 5, 2014 Posted August 5, 2014 Good job. It may be a sneaky way of her trying to start some interaction (fishing), or it may genuinely be an error. I'm thinking she's doing anything to interact, but I could be wrong. If she really wants to contact you, for whatever reason, she will.
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