pappa k Posted July 29, 2014 Posted July 29, 2014 I'm literally almost done with my ex. I don't want her back , I don't care anymore that she has a boyfriend. I'm just stuck at the stage of loneliness. I want to move on with my life and meet someone new who will treat me better than she did . But I know that I need to improve myself before I can get in a new relationship. What do I do to keep me distracted from feeling so lonely? 1
love1336x Posted July 29, 2014 Posted July 29, 2014 Embrace it. Love it. Watch TV, literally lay In bed and think, day dream. Cook, whatever it is. Just love it. Love the sense of peace that comes from being lonely. It can suck but nobody is bothering you. You are not in danger. Enjoy it. 4
Author pappa k Posted July 29, 2014 Author Posted July 29, 2014 I'm 24. I would love to be with a new women. But I'm not interested in anyone currently. I have the urge to rush into a relationship with the first gal I see but I know it would end bad 2
rewl Posted July 29, 2014 Posted July 29, 2014 You need to calm down and just enjoy being single, what's the rush? You're very young. 1
Author pappa k Posted July 29, 2014 Author Posted July 29, 2014 I've never really enjoyed being single. Maybe it's the fact my ex has a boyfriend that makes me feel like I need to be in one. She says she's happy I guess I'm just jealous that I'm not super happy 1
travelbug1996 Posted July 29, 2014 Posted July 29, 2014 Learn how to be happy with yourself outside of a relationship. If not, you won't be happy next time you're in a r. Learn to enjoy the company of yourself and be your own best friend.
scobro Posted July 29, 2014 Posted July 29, 2014 Any advice on how to do that? Start working on yourself from a Personal Development aspect.Start something new like a hobby,instrument,exercise whatever interests you.Anything to better yourself that you have not done in the past.Join social groups from meetup.com in your area.I enjoy reading self help books, so that helps me change for the better. Nobody can tell you only you know what you need to change about yourself for the better. Start a business plan for a small business idea you may have had....anything to start making a new life without your ex.
Author pappa k Posted August 5, 2014 Author Posted August 5, 2014 I miss my ex less than I did two months ago but I still feel lost and stuck . I'm lonely as hell and depressed pretty much always. I just feel like I'm not going to ever feel better. I just feel miserable. My ex is happy with her boyfriend and I'm here felling awful. I want to go on with my life and be happy. I went out to the bars and ended up dancing with a girl but she wasn't interested which bummed me out pretty bad. I want to move on and be happy again. And hopefully be with someone again but I don't see it ever happening. I want to find someone and settle down so bad
Reels Posted August 5, 2014 Posted August 5, 2014 If you know any activity or hobby that you prefer without her, you should stick to it. Remember that none of these feelings should affect your basic duties.
StGeorge22 Posted August 5, 2014 Posted August 5, 2014 Don't put so much pressure on yourself to meet a girl when you go out. Just go out with the intention of having fun with your mates, and if anything happens it's a bonus.
Shields boy Posted August 5, 2014 Posted August 5, 2014 Come on Pappa man. Stay strong and don't come across as so desperate to settle down. You're a young man and you need to start living a bit. It's only been 2 months and you are still healing. Why don't you up sticks and do some volunteer work overseas for a few months. That would heal the heart and make you become a better man. Patience Player
Author pappa k Posted August 6, 2014 Author Posted August 6, 2014 Can't go over seas because my daughter and job . I have never been one for one night stands or pointless short term relationships . I've always wanted to settle down and be a family.
scobro Posted August 8, 2014 Posted August 8, 2014 No girl will find a desperate, needy guy attractive.The only reason you feel like this is because your ex has someone and you don't.Trust me as time goes on you will feel normal and when you meet someone else maybe your ex will be single.All getting involved with a new woman is going to do is end badly.Plus, who wants to be with someone who just got out of a relationship.I usually make sure the woman has been single for at least a year or two.Those type of people are not carrying emotional baggage from their past relationships at least not recent stuff.You and your ex could possibly reconcile.It hasn't been that long.My ex was with someone else and called me out of the blue 5 or 6 months later and I foolishly went back to her.So slow down life is not all about being with someone especially at 24.
Author pappa k Posted August 8, 2014 Author Posted August 8, 2014 I just feel like I'm ready to die. It's not even about my ex at this point, life isn't getting better. All I've done since the breakup is binge drink when I'm not with my daughter. I feel like I may as well kill myself since life clearly isn't getting better. I know I'll miss my daughter if I die . But she's probably better off without me like her mom is .
Author pappa k Posted August 8, 2014 Author Posted August 8, 2014 I thought a girl fell into my lap recently but I guess she changed her mind about me. She said I was cute and wanted to meet up and even gave me her number. So like usual I got my hopes up and now I feel almost worse. I feel I'll never be happy again.
me85 Posted August 8, 2014 Posted August 8, 2014 (edited) The state you're in is more than concerning. I promise, I can relate. Things have happened in my life recently that have nothing to do with my ex. I'm also going through some very trying times in my life. Alcoholism runs in my family and I have finally realized that I myself have the disease as well. I turn to alcohol in every situation and rely on it to make me feel better, happier, have fun and just drink my cares away. I self medicate every day after work. I drink until I pass out. If one day I'm not drinking it's because I'm in bad shape from the night before. I'm what they call a "functioning alcoholic." Whatever you do, please do not jump into a RS with the next gal you meet. It will only make your situation worse. We have to learn and know that we can be happy on our own before we even think about being happy with someone else. Feel Better Champ. This too shall pass. Best wishes, J Edited August 8, 2014 by me85
Author pappa k Posted August 8, 2014 Author Posted August 8, 2014 My ex jumped into a relationship and she's happy. I thought this new girl would maybe help me feel better and she did until she randomly quit talking to me. I don't feel like I want to live at this point. I'm not ever find someone who gives a **** about me. I'm destined to die alone. I've known it since I was 2 16 that I would end up dieing alone of liver failure. I tried drinking myself to death for 3 years and never came close. Now am at it again and still no luck
me85 Posted August 8, 2014 Posted August 8, 2014 My ex jumped into a relationship and she's happy. I thought this new girl would maybe help me feel better and she did until she randomly quit talking to me. I don't feel like I want to live at this point. I'm not ever find someone who gives a **** about me. I'm destined to die alone. I've known it since I was 2 16 that I would end up dieing alone of liver failure. I tried drinking myself to death for 3 years and never came close. Now am at it again and still no luck You should be in therapy. Seriously. This is very scary to read. My heart goes out to you. You have everything to live for!!!!! Your daughter for one. Suicide is so selfish. It's really sad but extremely selfish at the same time. Are you close to family? Best friends? If so, lean on them now. They will help get you through this time of your life. You have to ask for help. That's my problem. I never ask. I'm too proud. But I don't have children or anyone who depends on me either. You should put all your focus into being a better father for your daughter. Imagine how hard her life would be growing up without her father? I can tell you how hard it is, my father is a POS who's never been there for me and I could care less about what happens to him. If you killed yourself or let yourself go you would be abandoning her. All her life she would be messed up about it.
Author pappa k Posted August 8, 2014 Author Posted August 8, 2014 Talking to my friends don't seem to help me any. I'd love to be in my daughters life but she will have a step dad soon enough. So what is the point. I just feel hopeless that I'm never going to find someone who cares about me. I was single 6 years before I met my ex who I planned on marrying. I don't want to spend another 6 years depressed and lonely again. I love my daughter but she doesn't bring me the same happiness that a new women would
me85 Posted August 8, 2014 Posted August 8, 2014 (edited) Talking to my friends don't seem to help me any. I'd love to be in my daughters life but she will have a step dad soon enough. So what is the point. I just feel hopeless that I'm never going to find someone who cares about me. I was single 6 years before I met my ex who I planned on marrying. I don't want to spend another 6 years depressed and lonely again. I love my daughter but she doesn't bring me the same happiness that a new women would Then don't! You have the ability to make your life better not anyone else! You can't be codependent on others to make you feel happy. You have to make yourself happy my friend. Happiness comes from within. Get on anti-depressants if all else fails but I think you may just not even be trying much at all. You can't be lazy in life. You have to fight your way through the hard times and believe in yourself. Even when you feel like no one else does. You're living for you. What's the point you ask?? Because life is for living. You were born to die, yes, we all are but you're not born to kill yourself! Or just waste away. You need to look at all the good things about your life and if it's not enough then focus on ways to improve it. It's all up to you. Edited August 8, 2014 by me85
Author pappa k Posted August 8, 2014 Author Posted August 8, 2014 I'm never going to be happy again no matter what I do. I tried working out, I tried spoiling myself with things I've wanted, I changed up my wardrobe. I've tried it all . I'm going to die alone no matter what. I may as well kill myself and get it out of the way so I don't have to live in misery anymore. Women are disgusted by me. I'm going to die alone so I might as well get it over with
me85 Posted August 8, 2014 Posted August 8, 2014 I'm never going to be happy again no matter what I do. I tried working out, I tried spoiling myself with things I've wanted, I changed up my wardrobe. I've tried it all . I'm going to die alone no matter what. I may as well kill myself and get it out of the way so I don't have to live in misery anymore. Women are disgusted by me. I'm going to die alone so I might as well get it over with Then try harder. Hopefully you get some professional help for your major depression. Best wishes, J
Author pappa k Posted August 8, 2014 Author Posted August 8, 2014 I've talked to professional and it didn't help. I'm dieing alone just like my worse fears may as well kill myself since I'm never going to find someone
Recommended Posts