ChinaBalm Posted August 4, 2014 Posted August 4, 2014 I am currently in a relationship of around 10 months with my also-female partner. Around six weeks ago, I sent a message to an ex on Facebook. The ex in question, well... that whole period was very complicated and I was seeking closure from it. I also told my best friend that I missed her and 'loved' her, in another conversation on Facebook. I don't, so I can't think why I even did such a thing. Anyway, my girlfriend found these messages and wasn't too happy. Yes, I know it was stupid, I'm an idiot, I have heard it all. I feel sick about it every day. So anyway, here we are. My girlfriend hasn't left me, she says she still loves me and wants to be with me despite what I've done. But she is VERY resentful toward me. We live together, as well if that's relevant. She thinks I was trying to cheat on her, no matter how many times I explain that I wanted closure from a complex situation I was in. I would never cheat on anyone, and I never have - it's just not me. She is currently away with her family, and last night we had a major row. We seemed to be making progress - we were slipping back into normal life, starting to have sex again etc, but now we're arguing everyday. Obviously, I know she's hurting and feeling very angry. She has held onto the screenshots of this conversation between me and my friend and the ex, and sends them to me every so often. I feel that while she has those. she won't be able to try and start forgiving me. I am aware I have made a terrible mistake, and am expecting her to leave me any day now. I have never felt such pain - but will she be resentful forever? Why is she still with me if she hates me so much? Wouldn't it be easier to just leave? What can I do to try and ease her pain?
Dork Vader Posted August 4, 2014 Posted August 4, 2014 No she will not be resentful for forever. But you best believe you are on thin ice. Nothinf justifies what you did closure, cheating, other motives.. Nothing will justify it or make it better. Your only option is to ask her to put it in the past and delete the messages/screen shots. If she does that means you too have to delete that person from your life. You'll be the one having to prove you can be trusted and ya you're going to walk through a lot of BS to get there. You should be thankful you have someone that is so understanding and committed to you.. It is rare to find.. Yeah you slip up again she'll be gone.. But you yourself put yourself in that position.. Not her.. So deal with your actions..
Author ChinaBalm Posted August 4, 2014 Author Posted August 4, 2014 No she will not be resentful for forever. But you best believe you are on thin ice. Nothinf justifies what you did closure, cheating, other motives.. Nothing will justify it or make it better. Your only option is to ask her to put it in the past and delete the messages/screen shots. If she does that means you too have to delete that person from your life. You'll be the one having to prove you can be trusted and ya you're going to walk through a lot of BS to get there. You should be thankful you have someone that is so understanding and committed to you.. It is rare to find.. Yeah you slip up again she'll be gone.. But you yourself put yourself in that position.. Not her.. So deal with your actions.. I am very thankful for her, and I am dealing with what I have done... it isn#'t her fault. I have asked her to delete those screenshots but she is refusing, for now. But thank you for the reply.
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